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Friday, 10 July 2009

image for Britney:  From Now On, I'm Fighting Reporter's Shit With Shit!
"The Paparazzi Poop!"

Britney has taken some time off "Circus" for a break and gone on a diet that purges EVERYTHING out of her system and, not unlike Oprah, the singer began describing about her flushing toxins from her systems in an "amazing" two week and a half detox program which she didn't do alone as Britney's doctor recommended she have a leading cardiologist to assist in the liquid plumber-like flush.

After being cornered by the press who asked about her looking so fresh, Britney stated, "I feel nice and pure and happy and much lighter, " Britney confided.

"I finally dropped most of those extra pounds that I had gained after the babies. I plan to do a longer one later."

"Detox specialist Dr. Richard Prentice oversaw my Cleanse which included a 110 per cent organic diet mixed with sauna sessions, alternating hot and cold baths, massages and I spent most of the time on a commode. You should have seen the stuff that came out!"

Then, as she noticed an uneasiness among the reporters, Britney began a long description about extra long, stinking feces that had been up her rectum.

She next went into the older crap that had "probably been in there for years" as the number of news hounds began thinning out.

Next came the parasites...and suddenly there was no one around except her and a girlfriend who had been on their way to go shopping.

"Did you see that?", she asked. "I have GOT to perfect and make it even worse. Remind me to get on the web this evening and talk to some docs, maybe even some embalmers or something."

"From now on I'm fighting shit with shit!" Britney enthused.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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