Written by Jalapenoman
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Topics: Michael Jackson

Thursday, 25 June 2009

In a news conference outside of Harlem's Apollo Theatre, Al Sharpton took the microphone and blamed the death of Michael Jackson (heart attack in his Los Angeles area home) on "Whitey."

When asked how whitey was responsible for the death of a former (and still suspected) drug user who has been in rehab in the past, who has had multiple surgeries to change his skin tone and his nose, cheeks, and chin, and has long been suspected of child molestation, Sharpton could not give exact details.

He did, however, bring up as part of his blame the civil rights movement, the Bush administration, the war in Iraq, and the increased cost of Kentucky Fried Chicken.

If, at any time in the near future, Sharpton ever issues a clear and concise statement where he can substantiate anything he has ever said, it will be reported as actual news.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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