Written by Valmerk
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Topics: Economy, Music

Friday, 10 April 2009

image for Blame The Economy - Rock Band Nickelback Changes Name To Pennyback
Pennyback's tour bus - when it had wheels.

The bad economy affects everyone and everything, and now it finally has its clutches wrapped around the fannypacks of the rock music industry. And the popular Canadian rock band Nickelback has just become its first casualty. This reporter recently spoke with a band member of the group that will now be known as Pennyback.

He confessed with a sense of deep regret in his voice, "We didn't want to raise our prices, but we really had no choice. The economy has hit me and all of my bandmates real hard, man. We just started buying old high school band instruments from garage sales. We switched to generic makeup and no frills hairspray from Walmart. Hell man, we even had to sell the wheels on our tour bus. We just can't spring for new ones right now. We just load all our our stuff in it and push it around on the highway. Sure, our feet get run over and our bodies are sore, but we suck it up and fight the pain at every concert, because our fans are the greatest fans in the world, and we love 'em."

He continued, "Yesterday, one of our roadies got side-swiped by a Smart Car. He's out and and he ain't gonna be replaced. Can you please pass me the Advil? It's the 500 count bottle. It's to your left, sitting on the broken folding table. Would you mind opening it for me? Its got a wicked hard childproof cap and my hands hurt. Thanks, dude."

In regard to the name change the band member stated, "At least with the new name you'll still get a penny back. Every time you earn 100 of them by supporting us, you can reward yourself by buying yourself something worth 25 cents at the dollar store."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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