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Topics: Poo, Toilet, Bob Dylan

Monday, 16 March 2009

image for Bob Dylan's Toilet Blowing In The Neighbor's Wind
Dylan's "Mighty Quinn" Port-O-Potty

Trouble may be "blowing in the wind" in Malibu, where a couple is accusing their neighbor, Bob Dylan, of permanently parking a stinking portable potty next to their mutual property line.

In a letter to the editor published by the Malibu Surfside News, Cindy and Dave Emminger publicly complained that the City of Malibu has been unable to help them solve the problem.

"I just don't think they give a shit", a second neighbor stated.

"Just trying to be neighborly", Dylan reportedly stated. "During a national emergency, we may need that crapper. So "come on without, come on within, you'll not see nothing like the Mighty Quinn", I've named it Quinn."

The Emmingers accused Dylan of "renting a toxic, hazardous, carcinogenic chemical toilet" and "plopping it down" next to their home, in a rural section of the city overlooking the ocean.

"This toilet is apparently intended by my neighbor, Bob Dylan, to be a permanent fixture on his property," the couple complained. They said the city's code enforcement staff has been unable to force its removal.

Dylan reportedly stated that the toilet could come in handy one day. "Just think, no water in any commodes. There's a shortage of water in California right now. Whether the Guvenator cuts us off or we get rationed, the Mighty Quinn for us to sit in, will be there. "Oh no, are we gonna fly, down in my easy chair."

A spokesman for Dylan and his Grey Water Park Productions was not available Sunday, and the City of Malibu routinely refuses comment on specific code enforcement issues.

Dylan has lived in Malibu for decades, and has pieced together an equestrian compound out of several lots in an older section of the city, not far from Zuma Beach.

"Seriously, the people taking care of the horses need to have a bathroom", Dylan told a reporter.

"Oh they'll pinch themselves and squeal and they'll know that it's for real, the hour that the shit comes in!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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