Written by Monkey Woods
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Monday, 15 December 2008

image for Strictly Come Dancing - Semi-Final To Be Re-Danced
Dancing: how low can it get?

In view of the tremendous amount of anger expressed by viewers of its dance show, Strictly Come Dancing, and the amount of publicity it has received, it is considering scrapping the result of Saturday's episode, and having the whole sorry mess re-danced.

During Saturday's semi-final, Lisa and Rachel and their partners were given top points by the show's judges, meaning Tom could not be saved from a dance-off to decide who left.

All three qualified, however.

OUTRAGE

Immediately, the switchboard in India was besieged by thousands upon thousands of irate callers*, some of whom were viewers disgusted by the shenanigans.

So angry were some of these, an emergency meeting was held on Sunday to discuss the implications of the public's outrage.

Present at that meeting, were Ken Blaggard, head of Moneymaking, the new chief of Entertainment, Barry Scrounge, and ousted former contestant, John Sergeant.

SILLY

Sergeant told us later:

"It was just getting silly. There was a real danger I was going to win."

POTS OF CASH

In the last five minutes, the following statement was issued:

"Due to the outrage caused by Saturday's ridiculous decision, the most sensible thing to do is to have all three dancers perform again, with the re-introduction of John Sergeant, and to broadcast the show on Christmas Day after the Queen's speech. This way, everybody wins, and we end up making pots of cash."


* Many of the calls had been wrongly connected from a similarly-numbered X Factor line.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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