Written by Karl Mercer
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Wednesday, 12 November 2008

image for Baddy or Goody
More talent in this, than in Jade Goody's lifetime (sadly to be cut short)

A recent survey has revealed that 85% of the general public have no sympathy whatsoever for Jade Goody in her harrowing cancer battle.

One man, 44, from Lincs. said "Better people have fought cancer and died from it. I wouldn't be surprised if this is some psychic shit...that so many of the general public actually wanted her to get it and she did". We thought this was a bit harsh.

Jade, famous for....

...

...

...

...scrap that, found out she had contracted the life threatening cell-mutating illness cervical cancer on the Indian big brother show.

Cervical cancer has been proved to have at least one definite, proximate cause and that is the venereal disease HPV, or human papilloma virus, actually a collective of various herpes and rash based viruses. A recent vaccination has been introduced to the general British public slags.

This means that, it is quite possibly Jade's own fault that she has cancer, for having unprotected coitus with some disease ridden scumbag.

There are young women in the UK, however, for whom cancer is not possibly self-inflicted, they die in a torrent of emotional wreckage and leave behind young families who don't have the money, or contacts at heat magazine to really milk it, they just have to get on with their lives with dignity, and bravery and respect; And it is those people who deserve the column inches, not some VD'd slapper who is famous for nothing.

I mean sure, I have a bit of sympathy for her kids but, to be honest, they probably want rid of the racist daft tart too, so they have a chance of developing some brain cells in their lifetime.

Make Karl Mercer's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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