Written by Monkey Woods
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Monday, 20 October 2008

image for George Lucas To Film New 'Italian Job' Series Of Movies
Hang on lads; I've got an idea

Star Wars director George Lucas, has said in an interview that he is ready to start filming his new project, a rehash of the classic 1969 British film caper, The Italian Job.

Originally starring Michael Caine as Charlie Croker, the new movie stars Michael Caine as Charlie Croker, and bears a striking similarity to its predecessor.

Lucas, though, has developed The Italian Job idea to extraordinary lengths; instead of just the one original film, he has planned a whole series of Italian Jobs, with as many as NINE sequels and prequels!

In the first, Croker's gang, assembled from East End barrowboys and 'homosexuals just out of jail', travels once more to Rome, with the intention of stealing the Pope. Things go wrong, people get 'beaten up', others are 'beaten' and bishops get 'bashed'. Some bloody doors also get blown off.

The trademark Mini Coopers are there, but no Benny Hill this time. He's dead.

Lucas sticks to the Star Wars formula in the prequel Italian Job -2, when he introduces the Force, and gives it to Mr Bridger, the incarcerated criminal mastermind who 'runs things' from his cell. Mr Bridger, played by TV host Graham Norton, uses the Force to good effect when meting-out justice to his underlings, one of whom is Camp Freddie, this time played by Dale Winton.

New to movies, Norton gets to utter the famous line:

"The Force is strong in this one",

as he merrily bums an inmate on the young offender wing.

Steven Spielberg is 102.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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