Written by Dan Bristol
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Friday, 21 May 2004

NEW YORK - Heavy metal pioneers Black Sabbath will reunite for Ozzfest, which begins July 10 in Hartford, Conn., according to the Ozzfest Web site.

Original Black Sabbath members Ozzy Osbourne, Tony Iommi and Geezer Butler, and Osbourne-solo band member Mike Bordin, will perform 26 shows. It will be their first live appearance since 2001.

"W'faughgl th'thing m'mwayby," said Osbourne. "You know, we got to have a . . . hmmawbbbble . . . d'you understand what I'm talking about?" Osbourne then drooled for several moments, farted and passed out cold.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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