Written by queen mudder
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Topics: Amy Winehouse, Hair

Sunday, 13 July 2008

image for Amy Winehouse's hair extentions harvested from corpse
Corpse hair extensions like these are endemic in the coiffeur trade

London - (Ass Mess): Camden Town residents are gobsmacked after a local grave robber admitted supplying Bong 'n' Spliff Superstars Hair Salon with tresses harvested from a corpse in Golders Green Cemetery that then ended up on singer Amy Winehouse's barnet.

Roger Shaghnasty of no fixed abode told Horseferry Road Magsitrates Court that the hair-raising exploit had been his soul (sic) source of income.

Co-defendant Muriel Licesquisher, 69, a hairdresser from Barking, admitted five counts of fencing stolen property and being an accomplice to grave robbery.

Their joint plea of mitigation was sent on to the High Court after Magistrate Mrs Oona Razorstrop JP, noted that the hair extensions that ended up on Winehouse's head had been carefully matched "because the singer is a walking dead ringer for the donor corpse."

Pete Doherty is paralytic.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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