Written by Norton Folgate
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Topics: The Apprentice

Tuesday, 6 May 2008

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The current series of The Apprentice continues to shock, surprise and entertain the viewing public.

In the wake of Sir Alan Sugar being fired we now learn that in this week's task there is not one single argument, back-biting, bullying or bitching.

Team members Lucinda and Jenny looked set to 'lock horns' when Lucinda told Jenny to go and f*ck herself. As the other house mates retreated to the sanctuary of the garden for their own safety, Jenny's response was in a passive tone. 'What Lucinda just said to me, whilst offensive, was direct, to the point and exactly what Sir Alan is looking for. Lucinda has shown her female assertiveness in a very much male dominated arena and I respect her for that'.

Responding to Jenny's verdict, Lucinda said in what only can be described as a TV moment 'the way Jenny dealt with my negative comment confirmed that she is all woman and a superb contestant. If I don't win The Apprentice then I sincerely hope she does.

Next week's task has the two teams given 100Ibs of pure cocaine which they must sell throughout London.

The team with the highest net profit wins and as usual, someone will be fired.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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