Written by Robert W. Armijo
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Sunday, 10 February 2008

image for Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana 3D image causes seizures in Japan
Japanese adolescents suddenly came down with seizures, while watching the popular entertainer perform on the big screen in 3D

Tokyo, Japan - Japanese government officials took immediate action to ban the Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana 3D Movie: "Best of Both Worlds Concert Tour," after it was reported that a number of Japanese adolescents suddenly came down with seizures, while watching the popular entertainer perform on the big screen in 3D. Officials say the measure was taken to prevent other children from having seizures as well and safeguard the wealth and welfare of its nation's most precious resource.

All the children were healthily before they saw Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana in 3D, said a spokesman for the director of health services of the Tokyo prefecture.

According to the medical reports, the children were just sitting in their movie theater seats watching the Miley Cyrus 3D movie, singing along like they do at the local neighborhood Karaoke bar when they suddenly they fell to their knees, rolled between the rows and into the aisles shaking and violently convulsing before falling into a coma.

"Everybody was so happy,' said Aki Suko, a local movie theater proprietor who was an eyewitness to the phenomena. "They we all so happy, I was a happy too, singing along too."

Suko said the trouble began as soon as the first 3D imagine flashed onto the big screen lighting up the darkened theater.

"Bad Hannah Montana. She comes on the movie screen in the 3D and all the happy signing stop. All except my happy signing. I think, 'Why did all the happy singing stop?"

Suko then checked up on his silent movie going patrons. To his surprise and dismay, he and his ushers found the theater once filled with signing Japanese adolescents just moments before, now filled with children rolling, shaking and violently convulsing on the floor. Some were unconscious, already in an advanced state of coma.

"They don't happy sing no more or talk no more too. Just sleep. All the time sleep. That's no good," said Suko.

Officials state that the ban of the Miley Cyrus 3D special will go on indefinitely until they can figure out what caused the seizures.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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