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Wednesday, 27 June 2007

image for "There's Somebody At The Door!" Rod Hull Speaks From The Grave
A solitary Emu feather - left at Rods grave on the anniversary of his death

Deceased puppet master, wiry ginger bloke and children's entertainer Rod Hull has sensationally contacted Emu from beyond the grave.

Rod came through a spiritual medium hired by the wacky blue bird to help Emu come to terms with his guilt after sending Rod up onto the roof of their shared home, on the 17th of March 1999.

In an inquest to his death, East Sussex Coroner Alan Craze recorded a verdict of accidental death six weeks after Mr Hull died following a fall from the roof of his home at Winchelsea, near Rye. He was attempting to adjust the TV aerial in order to get a better picture of the Football Club Internazionale Milano v Manchester United Champions League Quarter Final, 2nd Leg.

Emu at the time was putting some more cans of beer in the fridge and ordering a Chinese, and has never forgiven himself as at the time of his death Rod was 63 and Emu was comparatively young.

Upon Hull's death, Michael Parkinson reminisced that he had found him to be "a very charming, intelligent and sensitive man - quite unlike the Emu." He observed that the puppet "was the dark side of Rod's personality, and very funny, provided it was not on top of you."

Rod is reported to have told Emu to move on, and stop blaming himself. He also told Emu to forgive Grotbags for all the horrible things she did to both of them throughout their career.

A spokesman said "Emu is very comforted by this revelation, and now feels he has closure on this very difficult chapter of his puppet life."

Emu is presently out of retirement, biting peoples faces and crotches up and down the UK, and working with Toby Hull, one of Rods five children by two marriages.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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