Written by queen mudder
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Thursday, 25 January 2007

image for Kidman in zombie state after crash
Nicole is still in a state of zombification

Los Angeles, Ca - (Rioters): Actress Nicole Kidman is reported to be hospitalised in a zombie state tonight after crashing a car in a carcrash scene during the filming of her latest movie The Invasion.

Her publicist said Ms Kidman had been trying to shake zombies off the bonnet of her Jaguar when the car spun off the road.

The accident occured on an LA public highway which had been sealed off for filming. Eye-witnesses reported seeing the zombies strike at about 0100 (0900 GMT) on Thursday.

Both Ms Kidman and the zombies were then taken to hospital where their condition has been described as hysterical.

Studio bosses are still looking for their stunt team who fled in terror of the zombies when they first appeared off-cue during filming of the car chase scene.

Nicole Kidman, 43, has made a number of entertaining films, a few turkeys and Moulin Rouge - which to this date defies categorisation beyond jaw-wrenchingly vomit-inducingly goddawful beyond comparison with anything else of its genre.

Apart from the subsequent Channel No 5 Xmas ad.

Postscript: reporter's son is adamant 'The Others' is cruel and unusual beyond Geneva Convention standards of torture.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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