Shocks reverberated round the Royal Albert Hall last night, when Sir Bob Geldoff announced that Saddam Hussein was voted the Scruffiest Git of the Year'.
Insiders thought that Mr Williams, the Archbishop of Canterbury would romp home with the title.
However, it was obvious that Saddam would get the title when pictures were beamed round the world, following his capture.
The Archbishop was visibly upset by the news that he was only the second scruffiest person of the year.
I really tried hard to win this competition,' Mr Williams confessed.
I have often felt a bonding with the tramps and detritus of our sick and sickening society,'
By dressing like a hobo and sporting a dirty, unkempt beard I reinforce this message to the world.'
When asked if he felt that the competition judges had positively discriminated on the grounds of race and religion, the Canterbury cleric reflected.
Jesus was a foreigner', he stated.
And he was a very fine chap.'