Written by President Bush
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Monday, 1 January 2007

image for Brad Pitt Catches Angelina Jolie With Jennifer Aniston
Snapped by Paparazzi chasing police chasing Pitt chasing his 'wives'

As if the whole Ménage à Ménage couldn't get any Ménagier, Ocean's Thirteen star Brad Pitt walked in on his live-in wife Angelina Jolie who, one Paparazzi source said was in the embrace of his EX-wife, Jennifer Aniston. Police, on the scene after an anonymous 911 call described the scene that followed saying:

"Mr Pitt quickly left the home, parked outside and waited for Jolie and Aniston to drive off in Jolie's car. Pitt pursued them. We pursued Pitt. The Paparazzi pursued everybody God only knows who pursued them. We can't specify the name of the motel where Jolie and Aniston stopped but it had vibrating beds and a picture of a neon donkey on the sign."

Motel Owner Phil (lastname with-held) told reporters after the rucus,

"I .. they, Mz Jolie and Aniston, Pitt I thought they all just wanted a room to .. I didn't know the whole gang and the donkey were going to level the place."

Pitt, his hair a bit ruffled in two places is now in Seguna county jail charged with one count of impersonating a donkey and 2 counts of roughing up his wives (neither of them of course BEING his wife).

Jolie's estranged father Jon Voight told police that as far as he knew his daughter and Jennifer Aniston were great lifelong childhood friends until that "dumping the wife" incident. Voight told reporters,

"I felt sorry for Jen when Brad left her but I knew she'd understand, Brad going to the arms of the childhood friend Jen used to play jacks with. I GUESS that's what Jen and Angie were doing way back then with the door closed. And the windows locked. And the radio turned up loud. And sighs coming from the room those sure must have been some darned good Jacks games."

Bond for Brad Pitt has been set at whatever he can afford to pay.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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