Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 27 February 2014

image for Blake Shelton To Perform At The White House - But Under One Very Strict Condition
Blake Shelton said that performing at the White House has been his dream ever since he was 7.

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The White House has confirmed that country music artist Blake Shelton will be performing at an upcoming White House Hoedown.

White House Press Secretary Cal Colfax informed the White House press corps that the one stipulation that is being made is that Mr. Shelton must perform while 100 percent sober.

Colfax said that the White House fully understands that Mr. Shelton has a history of tossing back the beer bottles and for that reason he will be required to take a breathalyzer test one hour before performing.

If Shelton is found to have any alcohol in his body whatsoever he will be escorted out of the White House and off the property by Secret Service agents.

SIDENOTE: Blake's wife, fellow country singer Miranda Lambert has assured Mr. Colfax that her husband will be sober, because if he isn't she will take a broom and proceed to beat the beer out of him.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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