Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Sunday, 26 January 2014

image for Justin Bieber Confesses He Is One Hell Of A Mess
Justin says that a space alien has taken over his life.

HOLLYWOOD - A close friend of Justin Bieber who did not want his name mentioned has commented that Justin told him that he has no idea what the hell is going on with him.

Bieber confided to the friend that he is one hell of a mess and he feels that a space creature has taken over his life.

Justin said, "Man, this space alien has taken over my brain, and my body, and my mind, and my head, and my brain."

Bieber paused for a moment and said, "Hey did I just repeat the word brain twice or was it the word head?"

The pop singer who is spiraling downward at a high rate of speed said that he partially blames his ex-girlfriend Selena Gomez for his being a mess.

Justy Boy, as his very short mother Pattie Mallette calls him, said that he is very embarrassed because the mug shots of him that were taken in Florida showed all of his pimples since the officers made him take off his Covergirl makeup.

SIDENOTE: Justin Bieber is extremely despondent. And he also blames Ann Coulter, Kobe Bryant, Omarosa, Sheriff Joe "Pinky" Arpaio, and that damn dishwater blonde skank Chelsea Handler.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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