Written by President Bush
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Topics: Larry King, Atlanta

Sunday, 8 October 2006

image for Larry King Live Dead
King Live as a Lad

Larry King Live was found dead .. blindfolded, stabbed, bound and gagged stuffed in a dumpster outside a posh Atlanta adult bookstore late last night.

Police suspect foul play.

Was King there to purchase essential adult supplies or there instead to conduct an insider interview with insiders inside the thriving adult entertainment industry?

Whatever reason he was there he's dead .. Larry King Live.

King, born at an early age then named Horatio Von Gublesweitzer soon had his his name legally changed to "Larry King Live" at the age of 18 for personal reasons King explained in his most recent book, "Larry King Live".

When asked why he changed his last name to "Live" King replied that he didn't know, he just "did it". A smart move many analysts say when years later a young fledgling cable network called "CNN" needed a talk show host with the word "Live" somewhere in their name.

"Gublesweitzer (King Live) fit the bill perfectly" CNN executives told reporters saying

"We had a concept for a LIVE late night talk show about total nothing, we stumbled upon a strange looking creature with the word LIVE in his name, Larry King, we put two and two together .. BINGO .. we've got four AND we've got LARRY KING LIVE. How cool is that?"

Noted for asking the "tough" questions Larry King Live once got the living snot slapped out of him on camera when he once asked Madonna what it was like to be a certified slut.

"She walloped him REAL good King Live" one CNN cameraman on the scene noted.

King's interview with Jesus Christ which never hit the airways was perhaps the pinnacle of his career. CNN, concerned about backlash from non-Christian viewers chose instead that night to air King's interview with Ozzie Ozbourne's Dope Dealer who to this day swears Ozzie's kicked the liquid nitrogen snorting habit .. "as far as the dope dealer knows" although, according to sources Ozbourne does periodically cough up fur balls, tri-glycerides and random nitrous oxide pellets when agitated, aroused or riled.

Atlanta police, still suspecting possible foul play in the death of Larry King Live questioned CNN's Anderson Cooper and CNN's Wolf Blitzer who've also conducted "interviews" at the same posh Atlanta adult bookstore, Cooper assuring police that he and Wolf would get to the bottom of King's mysterious demise just as soon as they finished interviewing the DVD's in viewing room 12 of the posh Atlanta adult book store where Larry King Live was found dead, in a dumpster.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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