Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 5 June 2013

image for Tom Cruise Caught Parked At The La Brea Tar Pits With a Katie Holmes Blowup Doll
Friends of Tom say that the actor has pretty much subsisted on burgers since his divorce from Katie Holmes.

LA BREA - Friends of Tom Cruise are concerned about him and say that he is still really bothered at the fact that last summer's movie Rock of Ages flopped at the box office big time.

According to Silver Screen Showcase Magazine the film cost $75 million to make and it only brought in a little less than $40 million.

One long time friend said that Tom recently told him that he was so depressed about his divorce and then about the movie tanking that he actually considered moving down to Costa Rica and buying a banana farm.

Tom has been keeping pretty much to himself and his hair stylist FuFi Fondue says that Tom's extent of dining out is limited to his going through the drive thru window at Burger Bandit.

Fondue did say that Cruise is embarrassed at the fact that last week he was caught parked at the La Brea Tar Pits with a Katie Holmes Blowup Doll.

Tom told the investigating officers that he misses Katie more than anyone could ever know.

The officers confiscated the doll and told him to drive home and stop acting like Katie Holmes is the last girl on the face of the Earth.

In Late Breaking News. Kim Kardashian has stated that her doctor told her that her most recent sonogram shows that her baby could end up weighing 13 pounds at birth.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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