Written by Abel Rodriguez
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Monday, 3 June 2013

image for Kristen Stewart May Pose In The Nude In Order To Get Back In The Hollywood Spotlight
A photo of Avalonia McBricker, K-Stew's stunt double in The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2.

WEST HOLLYWOOD - The star of The Twilight Saga series, Kristen Stewart is said to be feeling very down and depressed about the fact that her career has seemed to hit a fortified brick wall.

Stewart recently spoke with Barbara Walters on The View and told her that if she did not know any better she would swear that someone has put an evil Louisiana voodoo curse on her.

She remarked that things have all been going downhill with her ever since she had her infamous affair with Rayburn Fandersketti, her accent coach on the film Snow White and The Huntsman.

Shortly after that she says that Rob Pattinson, the love of her life, the man of her dreams, and the guy who stirs the hormones nestled deep within her groin region dropped her like a hot Idaho potato.

She pointed out that shortly after that she was falsely accused of trying to steal a double A battery from a Zippity Doo Dah Electronic Store in La Brea.

And most recently she was involved in a Tall Timbers Supermarket shopping cart incident with supermarket tabloid writer Skippy Viperwater.

Viperwater is employed by the publication Say What? and he wrote a 400 word story that included 14 extremely unflattering photos of Stewart.

K-Stew said that she recently spoke with her close friend Paris Hilton and she suggested that in order for her to get back in the Tinsel Town spotlight she will need to appear in a nude layout.

SIDENOTE: Kristen is presently in talks with PlayMale Magazine and hopes to appear in an upcoming issue.

Make Abel Rodriguez's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 4 plus 4?

5 3 8 11

Go to top