Written by Karen Fish
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Topics: Amanda Bynes

Friday, 22 March 2013

image for Amanda Bynes Meant Drake Bell

In 'The Little Prince' the fox says "Words are a source of misunderstanding." Today Amanda Bynes has set the net on fire by tweeting "I want Drake @ Drake to murder my vagina." The Twittersphere thinks that Amanda Bynes is talking about the Jewish rat packer Aubrey Drake Graham. Sammy Davis Jr. must be rolling over in his urn.

Lily Tomlin is to Vagina Murder what Anderson Cooper is to Gefilte Fish. Would Pope Francis reform the Catholic Church to put Jesus Christ aka Joshua aka Yeshua aka Eshua on the cross with a long beard, black coat, black hat ie in full rabbinical garb? Are you ready Tehran?

Normally the media speaks in euphemisms to make it PG but today Amanda Bynes broke the profanity barrier. "You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell, You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell, You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell, You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell, you can ring my bell, you can ring my bell, (ding, dong, ding, do-ong), you can ring my bell, you can ring my bell, (ding, dong, ding, do-ong, ring it!)". Ring it!

Passover is Monday and Easter is next Son Day. Why doesn't every Catholic know that The Last Supper was the first Seder? "Why do birds suddenly appear, Every time you are near? Just like me, they long to be, Close to you." "If I were a carpenter, And you were a lady, Would you marry me anyway, Would you have my baby?"

Last week white smoke poured out of the Sistine Chapel, giant bells rang out in Vatican City, doves flew out of the Roman Colosseum and Anderson Cooper overcome with emotion pounded Kathy Griffin to proclaim the election of the little gay basher from Buenos Aires. We may be insane vicious murderers about to go extinct in Nuclear World War III following our Holy Bibles to murder everyone outside of our group but you can't say that we aren't interesting.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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