Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 9 February 2013

image for Paula Deen Getting That Huge Navel Orange Look
Paula Deen has become a great big fan of spray on tans. (Photo courtesy of Reba McEntire).

MEMPHIS - Paula Deen was in Memphis visiting her high school home economics teacher Mrs. Orchid Burlapinski.

Mrs. Burlapinski, who turned 91, on January 19, which also happens to be Paula's birthday as well, was shocked to see that her former pupil has changed so much just in the past few months.

For one thing the Southern Fried Dixie Grandma, as Michelle Obama calls her, has lost 40½ pounds, she has lightened her hair, and she has become obsessed with tanning beds.

A close friend of the 66-year-old Deen told Tittle Tattle Tonight that Paula has also become a fan of spray tan in a can and has been rumored to go through a dozen cans a week.

The unnamed friend also revealed that when she last saw Paula a week ago at a local Tall Timbers Supermarket the TV cooking show host had a huge navel orange look about her.

Friends, family, and fans of the platinum blonde culinary countess are worried that if she keeps on using that tanning spray and frequenting those tanning salons she could end up looking like the biggest pumpkin south of the Mason-Dixon Line.

SIDENOTE: Paula Deen's show is still as popular as over. Miami Heat superstar LeBron James recently stated in an interview in Sports Balls Illustrated Daily that Miss Deen can take three-day old road kill and make it taste like Chicken and Dumplings.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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