Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 24 October 2012

image for Bristol "The Pistol" Palin Is Said To Be Very Depressed
Bristol shown driving down Igloo Boulevard in downtown Wasilla, Alaska.

WASILLA, Alaska - According to Bristol Palin's younger sister Willow, Bristol known as The Baby Moose, is devastated at having been eliminated from Dancing With The Stars.

Willow said that Bristy had told her that she was going to win the prestigious Mirror Ball Trophy and that dancers like Shawn "Shortcake" Johnson, Gilles The Frenchman" Marini, Emmitt "Cowboy" Smith, and Sabrina "Cheetah Girl" Bryan were not going to stand in her way.

Well the girl who loves to cuss up a storm found out that she was not the fantastically tremendous dancer that she and her mommy, Sarah "The Loose Moose" Palin thought she was.

Bristol was already feeling down due to the fact that her reality show Bristol Palin: Life's A Tripp was cancelled after airing only two episodes.

The word out of Tinsel Town was that after the second show the three sponsors Cellulite-Be-Gone Cream, Rapunzel's Hair Extensions Inc., and Paul Bunyan Brand Condoms all cancelled their advertising contracts with the show citing the fact that only about 617 or so people had watched the nationally televised show.

SIDENOTE: Sarah and Todd are very concerned about Bristol's well-being and her state of mind and have suggested that in order to appreciate what she has that perhaps she and Tripp should take a trip to one of the Blue States so she can see how the middle class and poor class live.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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