Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Friday, 28 September 2012

image for Taylor Swift Says She'll Be A Kennedy
A strand of her hair that Taylor gave to Conor as a good luck symbol. (Photo by Ethel Kennedy).

NASHVILLE - Taylor Swift has sold over 22 million albums and has appeared on episodes of CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, Two and A Half Men, and The Cupcake Wars.

She has also dated the likes of well-known Hollywood personalities such as Joe Jonas, Taylor Lautner, John Mayer, and Jake Gyllenhaal.

The 22-year-old country singer has millions of fans all over the globe including 147 in the little African country of Loombeezi.

She recently told Fajita San Guacamole with Hollywood Innuendo that when she is with Conor Kennedy that she's as happy as a bull with a herd of 100 nymphomaniacal cows.

Conor, who is only 18, and still in high school, is the son of Robert F. Kennedy Jr., and the grandson of Robert F. Kennedy. He is the proud owner of seven skateboards.

Taylor says that Conor has the Kennedy hair, the Kennedy voice, and the Kennedy money.

San Guacamole learned that Taylor is just Conor's third girlfriend. His first two were Rydelle Dorfenderry and Hannah Oxkowski.

He broke up with Rydelle because her father Air Force General Tyrus T. Dorfenderry got transferred to Juan Valdez Air Force Base in Pitalito, Colombia.

And Hannah left him to join the Ringling Brothers Barnum & Bailey Circus as a human cannonball.

Right before dating Conor, Taylor dated his cousin Patrick Schwarzenegger, son of Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver, but he broke up with Taylor at the insistence of his mother Maria and his Great Aunt Caroline Kennedy who threatened Swift with a lawsuit.

SIDENOTE: Taylor recently confided to Hollywood hair stylist FuFi Fondue that she has had lots of records in the Top Ten and she has won lots of Grammies but that her goal now is to one day become Mrs. Conor Kennedy also known as Taylor Swift-Kennedy.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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