Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Friday, 6 July 2012

image for Ian Somerhalder and Nina Dobrev Buy Russell Brand's The Blue Tattoo Ranch In Texas
The Blue Tattoo Ranch shown during a little old Texas "Gully Washer."

SAN ANTONIO - The young stars of The Vampire Diaries flew into San Antonio to tour the 3,000 acre Blue Tattoo Ranch which is owned by Russell Brand.

The beautiful, sprawling, working cattle ranch was originally owned by country legend George Strait who had a tremendous hit with his song "Amarillo By Morning" and then the follow up "Topeka By Evening."

Straight sold The Blue Tattoo to San Antonio Spurs guard Manu Ginobili who eventually sold it to Jesse James, Sandra Bullock's ex-husband.

After James ended his engagement to Kat Von D, he decided to sell the ranch and he put it on the market.

A conglomerate from Uruguay expressed an interest in purchasing the cattle ranch, but after a background check it was determined that the group was actually a front for a llama blanket counterfeit ring.

Ian first found out that the ranch was for sale when he saw a story on the Ranch's history in an edition of the TV news magazine Bedroom Pillow Talk.

He immediately contacted Brand and he and Nina flew to San Antonio.

When they arrived at the ranch The Vampire Diaries couple was simply spellbound. They both instantly fell in love with the luscious green pastured ranch, the longhorn cattle, the oil wells, the trophy bucks, and the fact that the ranch had two creeks; one flowing with hot water and one flowing with cold water.

Jesse told them that the ranch house is 4,000 square feet and the ranch has its own private small airplane landing strip.

He also informed the couple that The Blue Tattoo is one of the few ranches in South Texas that has the ultra modern, state-of-the-art Vaca X 7,000, which is a very impressive cattle branding machine that can brand 13 cattle per minute.

James also mentioned to Nina that the ranch house is equipped with a 20 by 20 square foot three station beauty salon which was one of the very first of its kind in the entire state of Texas.

SIDENOTE: Somerhalder and Dobrev were very impressed with the ranch and agreed to the asking price of $21.9 million.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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