Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 23 May 2012

image for Dancing With The Stars Crowns Green Bay Packer Wide Receiver Donald Driver As The 2012 Mirror Ball Champion
A pet snake named "Mr. Jive" that Maksim Chmerkovskiy gave to Jaleel White. (Photo by Val Chmerkovskiy).

HOLLYWOOD - The 14th season of Dancing With The Stars had without a doubt the best celebrity dancers in the shows history.

This year's final three consisted of Welsh opera singer Katherine Jenkins (paired with Mark Ballas), Mexico's top soap opera star William Levy (paired with Cheryl Burke), and Green Bay Packer wide receiver Donald Driver (paired with Peta Murgatroyd).

Len "The Grouchy Grouch" Goodman stated to Pico de Gallo with Tittle Tattle Tonight that any one of the three could have easily won any of the previous 13 championships.

Bruno "The Gaytalian" Tonioli said that he has a tremendous crush on both Donald and William. Carrie Ann Inaba said that she totally agreed with Bruno.

This season had its share of injuries from Maria Menounos (paired with Derek "The Dancing Dude" Hough) spraining her tongue to Melissa Gilbert getting her nose bruised after her partner Maksim Chmerkovskiy accidentally hit her with a bandit's sombrero during a paso doble routine.

Sherri Shepherd of The View was dropped on her head by Maksim's younger brother Val Chmerkovskiy but luckily she somehow managed to land on her sweater vest which helped to cushion the fall.

And Martina Navratilova (paired with Tony Dovolani) re-injured an old tennis elbow injury she had received in Kirkintilloch, Scotland back in 1991.

Of the three couples that were left, William Levy and his partner Carrie Ann Inaba lookalike Cheryl Burke were the first to get eliminated.

Levy thanked the audience and said that Cheryl taught him a lot about dancing, dedication, devotion, and dating.

When host Tom Bergeron announced that Donald Driver had won DD jumped into the audience ala The Lambeau Leap. His partner the astoundingly sexy Peta Murgatroyd followed him but somehow got her bikini top caught on the tie of a very surprised but thrilled beyond belief elderly gentleman.

President Obama called from the White House and congratulated Donald on the air telling him that he was proud of the way that the brutha moved on the dance floor. The president then asked him to say hello to the sensuously erotic Peta Murgatroyd.

SIDENOTE: Along with winning the coveted Mirror Ball Trophy Donald and Peta will also get a three day, three night all-expenses paid vacation to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico where they will stay at The Whole Enchilada Hotel & Spa.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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