Written by Jean Le Fete
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Monday, 9 January 2012

image for Paul McCartney and Rolling Stones to Pay for Breast Implant Replacements
Handle With Care!

In Parliament today, angry protestors pushed their way through security pulling a hose from a tanker truck filled with thousands of gallons of industrial silicone. The kind alledged to be in thousands of breast implants in thousands of women.

The British government said there was still not enough evidence to recommend routine removal of breast implants made by defunct French company using silicone of dubious quality. It said it would pay for removal, but only 50% for replacements.

Wanda Jones a protestor today said,"I'd like Andrew Lasley to tell his freakin' wife he's only going to replace one of her breasts! And that's just for them whose breasts was dun by the National Health Service! Anybody of the other 50,000 or more is stuck with the damned things!"

The thousands of gallons of silicone pumped into the British House of Commons caught MPs by surprise, "It's a bit slimy when its not in a breast," said Frank Wideman.

"We did this to let lawmakers physically see what's inside these bad implants!", said Wanda.

In related news, Paul McCartney, the Rolling Stones, U-2, and UB-40, have started a fund for women affected by the implants.

Keith Richards said, "These lasses have put their trust and breasts in the hands of surgeons so that we men can have something nice to look at. The least we can do is chip in to help them rebuild their gams.:

Paul McCartney's Linda died of breast cancer and so it was a natural for him to donate, "So many are not just cosmetic replacements now are they? Rather they lost them to cancer."

The fund will be supported by a special concert to be held at Albert Hall in summer of 2012.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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