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Saturday, 31 December 2011

image for David Beckham and Lady Gaga To Open Chain Of Pie and Mash Shops
Shop Location: Refurbishment Starts in January

In terms of musical collaborations you might have expected Lady Gaga to duet with the 'Posh of Spice' Victoria Beckham, but records at companies House suggest that it's hubby David who will be partnering with the Gaga in 2012 - but not in the studio making music - they're opening an international chain of Pie and Mash shops.

BIZARRE

The bizarre business plan was concocted after Bacon lover Lady G heard that Becks missed his favourite meal of pie and mash while staying in Los Angeles. Gaga herself was looking to make inroads into the east End of London after pop rivals Britney and Rihananananana flocked to the area and DVB7 was the perfect partner after hailing from the area.

Britney filmed her recent 'Criminal' video in downtown Dalston, while Rihanna is secretly dating a model from London Fields who appeared in her latest video. In fact, the song 'We Found Love In A Hopeless Place' actually refers to the rundown area of Hackney where he grew up.

LOCATIONS

The as yet unconfirmed locations are Bethnal Green Road, opposite the Astro Star Cafe, Hackney Road opposite Ye Olde Axe strippers bar and one on the LA strip next to the Galaxy training ground.

But the main branch will be on the second tier of the Olympic Stadium - where Lady Gaga will personally distribute leaflets with a 20% discount voucher, while Becks cooks the liquor. THe deal was negotiated when Lady Gaga was asked to sing at the opening ceremony.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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