Written by Proffitt
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Topics: NASA, toyota

Thursday, 11 March 2010

image for NASA sacks Toyota

Johnny Pluto, head of big rockets at NASA today unceremoniously sacked Toyota. Riding on the crest of a wave some 6 years ago they were tasked with designing a ship to take man to Mars, but the dream is now over.

Mr Pluto said "They simply can't be trusted any more. Who wants to set off for the Red Planet only to over shoot due to a sticking throttle and end up on Jupiter, I mean Jupiter who wants to go there?"

Speculation is GM will now be awarded the contract and that points to a remarkable turnaround for the famous Detroit banger maker. Bing Spangler is the favourite to get the job of designing the new rocket likely to be based on the Hummer. "The Hummy may not be economical but it's durable and it's from the good ol' US of A," said Bing.

But Toyota aren't about to give up space travel just yet. After spending hundreds of yen on little plastic ships in the shape of a Prius they are now in talks with Vlad 'The Impaler' Putin about a joint venture. It's common knowledge that Vlad is keen to get himself into orbit and this could be his chance. The budding cosmonaut was hoping to rekindle the Lada project but that seems less likely considering how unreliable the Lada is.

When we asked Bing about the likelihood of a Toyota and Lada project he roared with laughter for a good five minutes and with tears rolling down his puffy red cheeks said, "Are you pissin me?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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