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Friday, 27 February 2009

image for Scot Sir Fred Claims Purse Moths Have Consumed his £16M Pension
Royal Entomologists will be examining the detritus of insects for the missing money

The Royal national bank has lost 24 billion this last year under the leadership of Sir Fred of Scotland. Most of that loss will fall on the broad but weary shoulders of the islanders of John Bull. When Lord Awl Myners realized that Sir Fred was making his get away with a pension of 16 million, he demanded that the retirement bonus be returned to the British people.

Sir Fred said that he would have been more than happy to return the sum except that when he went to retrieve it from his purse, he discovered that the moths had eaten every farthing.

When consulted, the British Association of Entomologists Winged creature Division, an insect like young larvae of a scientist buzzed down the stairs to speak. Professor Meta Morphosis was asked how many moths it would take to consume a pension of 16 million. Rubbing his feelers together and scratching his antennae, Professor Morphosis asked:

"Were they Scottish Frugal moths or the Welsh variety of Motharium Inebriensis?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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