Written by Jeff Brone
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Topics: Gay, clothing

Thursday, 3 July 2008

Employees at NorthCom Inc. offered a broad based opinion that the polo shirt they were given as part of an "employee appreciation" week recently is "pretty fruity" and "sort of gay."

"I'm not saying that I don't appreciate a free shirt" said auditor Doug Graybere, "but it's definitely one that I won't be wearing much." The shirt, which is "kind of a dark pink color" and has a logo which says "I (heart symbol) NorthCom" has been the subject of some discontent in the employee ranks.

Sean Harent, the HR director who was responsible for picking out the shirts, agrees that "they are gay, but not that gay."

He explained that the first choice for a shirt logo, the company insignia and the company name in bold letters, was "too complicated" and "looked too harsh and military."

Harent went on to say "At least that's what some people thought, so they decided to get this junk. I suggested we just go with dark blue shirts and no logo, but forget that. Some people even wanted to put an arrow through the heart, which I told them was a total fem festival. Thank God they listened to that."

He later added, "If you don't wear them with the collar up, they look less gay."

An anonymous employee added "At least it's better than last year's gift: a scented candle and a Judy Garland CD."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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