Written by David Hawkins
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Wednesday, 7 May 2008

image for Traffic Cameras Too Expensive Let Peeping Ted Do It
Perverted Old Dickhead Takes Photos Of Speeders - SPIT A GOOBER on him.

Expert economics professor Elmereesha Eelsniffer at Stanford University in California just finished a study. So says a flying chimp that nearly broke the windshield of my car on the way into OZ today. The study was an economical feasibility study to determine whether or not the stupid stoplight cameras were making any profit for the state.

Every time a camera gums up or breaks it needs to be fixed. Tickets also need to be fixed. There have only been 1% more drivers caught breaking laws. Hardly enough to warrant all the expense they have gone to in order to spy on everyone picking their beezil and talking on the Tumor Cell Phone.

Elmereesha suggested to California Bureau of Just Plain Idiotically Paranoid Stuff, CBJPIPS, that they might as well get some old peeping toms to help them out since they are out there anyway taking photos of who knows what. You really don't have to pay them. Just give them a fancy title and tell them they are secret agents and there you have it. Then they can sell all the spy cams on eBay.

It's a win win situation. So if you see a tattered old pervert standing on a corner taking your picture
just hoik up a good loogie with a lot of phlegm and as you drive by him, turn that gagging spitload into a projectile of sorts and see if you can land it on his face. Then flip him the finger and call him a perverted old dickhead. That should work.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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