Written by Auntie Jean
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Topics: Oil, Protest, Fracking

Thursday, 19 December 2013

image for Protests as Oil shale deposits under the UK mean widespread frotting
Oil frotting donkey

Oil reserves in shale deposits underneath 90% of the U.K. can be extracted cheaply and would boost the economy of the country beyond our wildest dreams, said an energy spokesperson this morning. "But by the time everybody has stopped whingeing and objecting to its extraction, Germany will probably have bought it at a knock down price" he added.

"Admittedly some of the oil will have to be extracted by frotting. But there is no evidence that frotting ever really hurt anyone. The technique was invented by frustrated Japanese businessmen who did it on the Tokyo tubes. Tests have been carried out on Hampstead Heath with no adverse reports, other than one gentleman who reported coming over a little queer.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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