Manchester City manager Roberto Mancini has caught the mood of the country when it comes to cycling, riding a smart new sky-blue bike to City's training ground.
(Metro)
Rumours he bought the bike from Arsene Wenger for £2 million have been denied by sources at City.
AC Milan have joined Liverpool and Arsenal in the race to sign Turkish international Nuri Sahin from Real Madrid after Jose Mour...
With the sun finally coming out for the final few days of the Olympics, a new problem has emerged, with pollution set to make breathing dangerous for athletes.
"Ozone levels are so high," said Boris Johnson, Mayor of London, who has decided to rem...
Once again the world at large has been deviously deceived by none other than the Queen of sensation publicity, Paris Hilton.
As I reported before Paris has opened a covert, underground publicity agency that only caters to specific, willing cliente...
Mitt Romney's tax returns were found Wednesday stacked in a recycling bin outside a fish market in Lucerne, Switzerland. The thousands of pages of documents were being used to wrap carp, catfish, and a variety of other ichthyoids by a fish monger who...
Mayor Bloomberg, stymied in his efforts to regulate consumption of sugary drinks and his insistence on women suckling their new born, is now poised to issue Uzis to the toll collectors on the City's bridges.
This follows his moves to have all toll...
Wembley HQ, England: With Team GB consolidating their third position in the Olympic tables, now it is time to shout a big "Hurrah" for the England Football team, who are third best at infighting, shagging each others wife's, getting boo'ded at by th...
Aries
March 21st - April 19th
Your must win at any cost attitude must be kerbed this September, for the sake of the less violent people around you, and to help prevent the high risk levels from the 4th to the 11th, of your making yourself look a bigger prat than usual. Especially if fail to think before talking!
Your silent but deadly passing of wind, will reach new heights around the 14th,...
London, England-- Although they haven't ended yet, the 2012 Olympic Games in London seem destined to go down in history as the best! Everyone seems to agree there are three things that make it the most beloved Olympics ever--the weather, the food, a...
While many are still stunned about David Beckham's omission from Team GB's football team, it has been confirmed that the former Manchester United and England star has been taking part in London 2012 after all.
However, his role has surprised many...
Isle of Dogs, London - The erection of a 50 foot blow-up Stonehenge replica at Barking Park is causing ructions among indigenous Druids.
They fear whordes of stoned New Age nuts amassing at the inflatable monument are f++king up the natural cosmic...
Dear Constituents
I have had a very hectic week and am now way behind with my Newsletters.
This is because I have been focussing hard on my training for the 2016 Olympic Games. I reckon four years should be enough for me to qualify for Team GB although we first need to get my sport recognised by the IOC.
As a sport, donkey dressage, donkey cross-country and donkey show jumping is not as r...
The story so far…
Analicia Cobalt is a young woman, recently graduated and on a teacher training assignment in her home town of Watford. When she goes to the job centre to tell them she is no longer looking for work, she meets Marcus Beige, a dashing young man to whom she is immediately attracted. Following a date at a coffee shop, Marcus invites Analicia back to his house. They chat in the...
Pity the humorist that is thought to be sober-sided and dull.
In New England for years we have heard the hue and cry that Bill Belichick is the most humorless person in sports and that his deadpan delivery kills them in the aisles.
No one has s...
Following the recent shootings in Colorado and Wisconsin, isn't it time that the US stood back, took a good long look at itself and focused the telescopic sight on the elephant in the room?
The pro-gun lobby rants about the fact that lone nutters will always kill people, regardless of gun controls. Psychiatrists will tell you, and rightly so, the lone nutters are relatively rare and that there...
A local playground is the centre of Great Britain's hopes for gymnastic gold in 2016 and beyond.
While groups of yummy mummies and alpha mums look on with pride, toddlers and youngsters barely out of nappies are learning the ropes on the apparatus...
Box office records for the latest NASA blockbuster based on an unmanned landing on planet Mars have proved disappointing.
Filmed at the massive open air studio known as 'Area 51', the latest would be blockbuster was shot in the barren desert there...
Whatabout,ID-Micheal "Micro" Shoft thanked a returning soldier he met at a restaurant and a firefighter he met in line at the grocery store. He even thank the garbage man for his service when he met him at the curb one morning after forgetting to set...
TUCSON, Arizona - The sad state of the nation's economy is having an adverse affect on everyone and the Ku Klux Klan is no exception.
The Arizona chapter of the KKK is reporting that due to a tightening of their budget they will be having to do so...
WEST HOLLYWOOD - Tom Cruise appears to be feeling a little bit better about his divorce from Katie "The Kid" Holmes.
Cruise and the sultry Latina Eva Longoria were seen dancing and doing a bit of bumpin' and thumpin' at the SalsaLand Dance Hall.
Every year hundreds of corporations throughout the United States spend millions of dollars trying to capitalize on already existing products in the hopes that they will be as successful as the originals.
And every now and then some of these consumer product spin-offs make it and they are wholeheartedly accepted and embraced by the American buying public.
But sad to say, most of the times the...
BILLINGSGATE POST - The San Francisco Chapter of Dykes on Bikes announced today that they were joining with The Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence in endorsing President Obama in the November election.
In 1976, a small group of women motorcyclists ga...