Funny story:  The Dorking Review To Spawn A Sequel? You're Having A Turkish!

The Dorking Review To Spawn A Sequel? You're Having A Turkish!

Rumours currently circulating around the offices of the Spoof website in Lancaster, suggest that a number of the site's contributors are planning on releasing a sequel to the massively unpopular, very nearly mediocre selling paperback book, 'The Dork...
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Funny story:  Russians Outraged at the Treatment of Victor Bout's Mustache

Russians Outraged at the Treatment of Victor Bout's Mustache

Reacting to the sentence handed down by a U.S. court yesterday against arms dealer Victor Bout a.k.a. the 'Merchant of Death,' Russian officials vowed to challenge the ruling, calling it "a tragedy of historical proportions." When asked how anyo...
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Funny story:  Obama Announces Initiative to Find Divisibility Test for 7

Obama Announces Initiative to Find Divisibility Test for 7

President Obama announced that for the remainder of his presidential term, his administration's primary security initiative will be to find a divisibility test for the number 7. "A divisibility test for 7 has been a sort of Holy Grail, eluding us...
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Funny story:  GOP:  "Dems declare war on head lice!"

GOP: "Dems declare war on head lice!"

Reince Priebus, Chairman of the Republican National Committee held a press conference this morning to announce that President Barack Obama and the Democratic establishment had declared a war on head lice in the US. Priebus stated in his opening re...
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Funny story:  New York Presbyterian Adopts Radical New Post-Op Cancer Treatment: Cross Fingers and Hope for Best

New York Presbyterian Adopts Radical New Post-Op Cancer Treatment: Cross Fingers and Hope for Best

As part of its ongoing mission to improve quality of care while lowering health care costs, New York Presbyterian Hospital recently announced that it was adopting a radical new treatment methodology for post-operative cancer patients: cross fingers a...
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Funny story:  GOP Primary Voters Would Like to Use One of Their Lifelines Please

GOP Primary Voters Would Like to Use One of Their Lifelines Please

Faced with an unpleasant choice in a rapidly narrowing but still unappealing field of presidential hopefuls, Republican voters this week asked television host Meredith Vieira if they could please use one of their lifelines to help them pick the corre...
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Funny story:  Prescott brain goes under the hammer

Prescott brain goes under the hammer

Nathaniel Prescott, previously known as John has put his old brain up for auction with a reserve price of between 4 - 6 million Euros according to Burnhams Auction house in Mayfair. Director, David Spinks believes it will be of special interest to...
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Funny story:  Princess Diana Memorial Fountain gushing raw sewage

Princess Diana Memorial Fountain gushing raw sewage

London - The lavatory seat-shaped water feature is the latest victim of the hosepipe ban after a thick brownish sludge was seen spurting from its hydro-aeration vents. Hype Park officials ordered a shutdown of the main pumping mechanism responsibl...
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Funny story:  Strange Old English Laws: Real or Myth?

Strange Old English Laws: Real or Myth?

The Law Commission has proposed the abolition of 800 antiquated laws, but there is a wealth of mythology about what is and isn't illegal. For instance, it is well known that urinating in a public building is an offence. And yet by sticking a draw...
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Funny story:  Confusion at 'NI cops sent sexagerian texts' headline

Confusion at 'NI cops sent sexagerian texts' headline

Sussex - A sixty-something lady from Bognor has complained about misleading headlines blaming policemen, suspected of receiving News International bungs, for sending her inappropriate S&M texts. Retired soprano Mrs Aida Bumburst said today the...
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Funny story:  High speed rail link 3 ready by 2075

High speed rail link 3 ready by 2075

The government has given the green light to the HS3 project that will see trains travelling from London to Dublin in under 30 minutes. The all new trains will be fitted with custom made nuclear reactors that will pump out nearly 2 million horse po...
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Funny story:  Gay chickens cannot be slaughtered rules EU

Gay chickens cannot be slaughtered rules EU

In a landmark case, the EU has rules that "Gay birds prefer cocks" and under the latest rooster charter must be individually considered for a right to family life. Given that some 2 billion chickens are pecking about across europe, this is expecte...
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Funny story:  Ron 'n' Fred's Easter Chat

Ron 'n' Fred's Easter Chat

"Art'anoon Fred, happy Easter mate. There yer go, got a pint in all ready f'yer on table 'ere. Sit yerself dahn 'n' get that dahn inside yer. Bit nippy out there innit." "Is a bit, yeah Ron. Still, it's only five minutes walk fer me t' get from my 'ouse to 'ere at The Golden Lion." "Easter in this country? Waste of time in my 'umble opinion Fred. Okay in Rio like, nice 'n' warm in Rio 'cause...
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Funny story:  Primrose Hill drug orgy leaves US ambassador seething

Primrose Hill drug orgy leaves US ambassador seething

London - Royal Parks Agency has been asked to install CCTV around the famous grassy knoll following rumors of drug-fuelled orgies on Primrose Hill, opposite the American ambassador's residence. Reports of teenage girls engaging in rampant gang sex...
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Funny story:  Stan Van Gundy Tugs on Superman's Cape

Stan Van Gundy Tugs on Superman's Cape

Management of the Orlando Magic informed their coach that superstar Dwight Howard wants his head on a platter. During a press conference when asked about the duplicity and rumors of duplicity of Dwight Howard, the coach threw the superstar under t...
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Funny story:  Ghost Ship Mystery

Ghost Ship Mystery

A mysterious ship without a crew has been found off the coast of America. This modern 'Marie Celeste' was thought to be a vessel of Ghosts who were scared of the gigantic seas and dived overboard in a panic. A well known communicator with spirits...
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Funny story:  Devil to be investigated by Trading Standards after "shafting" customers out of their souls

Devil to be investigated by Trading Standards after "shafting" customers out of their souls

News filtered in last night that The Devil is set to be investigated by a team of professionals from Trading Standards after accusations that he has been offering poor deals to people wishing to sell their souls. In the past The Devil has been kno...
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Funny story:  Tourette Man to be Voice of London's Tube during Olympics

Tourette Man to be Voice of London's Tube during Olympics

London Underground have chosen a Tourette's syndrome sufferer to voice all their station and train announcements throughout the two weeks of this year's Summer Olympics. In conjunction with the London Organising Committee of the Olympic Games (LOC...
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Funny story:  Bad Friday - congregation held under

Bad Friday - congregation held under

A service was held under 6 feet of water this morning in Morton-twix-Heron after occultists burst a nearby reservoir in preparation for their own Easter thanksgiving. In their version of events, a frogman in a white shroud emerges from a watery cr...
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Funny story:  BBC Axes Total Wipeout - TV Repair Man Promises Repercussions

BBC Axes Total Wipeout - TV Repair Man Promises Repercussions

Shadowy TV vigilante group TV Repair Man has promised to take action over the BBC's decision to axe a popular Saturday show. The corporation announced last week that it was cancelling Total Wipeout after six series. Fronted by Richard Hammond a...
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Funny story:  Dorking pensioner traps testicles during shower

Dorking pensioner traps testicles during shower

A pensioner had to be taken to hospital after they caught their testicles in a shower seat last week. Dorking fire crews were called out to the pensioner's house in Dorking on April 6th to help cut them free after getting their private parts trapp...
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Funny story:  10,000 police officers suspended for racist slurs

10,000 police officers suspended for racist slurs

Up to a quarter of all police officers are to be suspended with immediate effect pending an investigation into institutional ageism, fatism, simplism and racism. The whistle was blown by the Sun newspaper who have an arrangement with the home offi...
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Funny story:  Good Friday? What's Good About It? Asks Local Misery

Good Friday? What's Good About It? Asks Local Misery

A local misery was today questioning the traditional name for the Friday of the Easter holidays. The day has been named 'Good Friday' since time immemorial and comes after 'Maundy Thursday' and before, simply, Saturday and Easter Sunday and Monday...
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Funny story:  American Idol Sends The Obama Family's Favorite Contestant, Deandre Brackensick Back Home

American Idol Sends The Obama Family's Favorite Contestant, Deandre Brackensick Back Home

HOLLYWOOD - Way back in 1968, Dionne Warwick sang the song "Do You Know The Way To San Jose?" And after this week's American Idol elimination, in which Deandre Brackensick was eliminated, the extremely curly-haired falsetto-voiced 17-year-old will...
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Funny story:  Oprah Winfrey Wants To Sign Sandra Brick To Star In Her Very Own Reality Show

Oprah Winfrey Wants To Sign Sandra Brick To Star In Her Very Own Reality Show

CHICAGO - Oprah Winfrey, founder and CEO of OWN, the Oprah Winfrey Network, says that she finds 41-year-old, self-proclaimed British beauty Sandra Brick so fascinating that she has offered the English lady her very own reality show. Winfrey spoke...
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Funny story:  Angelina Jolie Explains Her Upskirt Photos

Angelina Jolie Explains Her Upskirt Photos

NEW YORK CITY - Angelina Jolie was in New York City on a promotional tour for her brand new line of perfume named Scent of Jolie. As the actress was getting out of a cab in downtown Manhattan several members of the Big Apple paparazzi managed to s...
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Funny story:  Samantha Brick To Be Guest Of Honour At The Etihad Next Wednesday

Samantha Brick To Be Guest Of Honour At The Etihad Next Wednesday

In his boldest psychological warfare tactic yet, Sir Alex Ferguson has announced through intermediaries that self promoting journalist, Samantha - I'm so beautiful it pains me - Brick, is to be 'Guest Of Honour' next Wednesday at The Etihad, when Man...
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Funny story:  Good Friday Pilgrims Flock To Pay Homage To Brian

Good Friday Pilgrims Flock To Pay Homage To Brian

Tunisia: - Millions of Good Friday pilgrims were gathering here in Tunisia today, in order to pay homage to Brian, a fictional, sort of Jesus-like character in the film, 'Monty Python's Life Of Brian.' Pilgrims flooded into the country from such d...
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Funny story:  Mancini - "I've Bought Super Mario An Easter Egg - That Oughta Sort It!"

Mancini - "I've Bought Super Mario An Easter Egg - That Oughta Sort It!"

In the face of ever mounting criticism following Manchester City's end of season disintegration, scarf wearing head coach, Roberto Mancini has announced that he has taken the first steps in the process of papering over the cracks with unsettled strik...
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Funny story:  Old Hats Are Old Hat Says Hat Manufacturer

Old Hats Are Old Hat Says Hat Manufacturer

The UK's leading designer and manufacturer of quality headgear, Onme Edson, of the Ilkley Moor Hat Firm Inc of Spewing Malden Mill, Dorking, today announced that old hats are old hat, and that anybody who's anybody in the world today is investing in...
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Funny story:  Hosepipe banned in Kew Gardens!

Hosepipe banned in Kew Gardens!

So much for the hosepipe ban: The sprinklers that keep the grass lush outside Parliament are still pumping out water! * But the rest of us, the proletariat, the voters, the riff-raff and Spoofers, will face £1,000 fines for washing the patio? *...
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Funny story:  Cougars Upset Over Amount Of Unwanted Attention The MILF Market Has Brought Them

Cougars Upset Over Amount Of Unwanted Attention The MILF Market Has Brought Them

ISSAQUAH, WA-Cougars, long since held as nature's third coolest cat (behind lions and tigers, respectively), have recently come into a bit of an identity crisis. This is due in large part to the recent branding of 40-somethings who romantically t...
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Funny story:  Well It Looks Like Kim Kardashian Is Sticking With The "Ks" As She And Kanye West Are Now An Item

Well It Looks Like Kim Kardashian Is Sticking With The "Ks" As She And Kanye West Are Now An Item

HOLLYWOOD - It appears that Kim Kardashian is finally over the heartbreak of the termination of her much heralded 72-day mock marriage to NBA hoopster Kris Humphries. And according to a reporter for Tittle Tattle Tonight the Kardashian diva has ta...
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Funny story:  New Starbucks Opens Up Inside Starbucks

New Starbucks Opens Up Inside Starbucks

Residents of New York City's Union Square area were delighted when a new Starbucks store opened up inside Union Square's already-existing Starbucks. Sean Kingsley, a graduate film student at nearby New York University, said that the opening of the...
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Funny story:  Victor Bout, 'Merchant of Death,' sentenced to wear mustache for life

Victor Bout, 'Merchant of Death,' sentenced to wear mustache for life

When prosecutors asserted that former Soviet military officer sold weapons to Columbian rebels for the sole purpose of killing Americans, Bout stood and shouted, "It's a lie!" in front of a packed courtroom. "Those guns were never intended to ki...
View 'Victor Bout, 'Merchant of Death,' sentenced to wear mustache for life'
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