OXNARD, California - Charlie Sheen is still celebrating from his recent $25 million settlement which he received for being wrongly terminated from his role as Charlie Harper in the sit-com Two and A Half Men.
The "Space Cadet" as he is known recen...
Theresa May has been found trapped inside a wheelie bin in Westminster, just 24 hours after her Tory Party Conference speech. The meanie Tory says she was dumped in the bin by a six foot Cat.
But Cat lovers have said they don't believe this. Th...
TYNE. Big wetty. Not left right wetty. Up down wetty.
Also windy, windy. Like bum after hot curry. No go there. Very bad.
987 falling.
DOGGER. Like woof-woof or man making sex in car parking.
1053 falling. Not know what that mean. Maybe good. Maybe not.
Precipitation soon. Not know what that mean either.
WEIR. Scorchio. Very good. No windy windy. Like river back home. Number 1.
1015 ri...
A new virus, Taqqya.exe, has been found. It is first time that the virus has been detected and analyzed. The Trojan horses like Arabism, racism, Aryanism, Christianism, Islamism, Americanism, anti-Americanism, Eurocentricism, Hitlerism, Leftism active in the Western body politic and the West's addiction to crude oil had made its detection almost impossible so far.
Because of these Trojans, T...
Trenton, New Jersey - Gov. Chris Christie, who turned down the chance to run for president of the United States earlier this week, has announced his candidacy for Ruler of Occupied Wall Street.
"Being president is not for me. You have to be certif...
High flying QPR have dashed Chelsea's dreams of sharing a luxury new stadium in Shepherd's Bush.
The upwardly mobile West London club have realised that their bijou dwelling in Loftus Road is too small for Champion's League football and are looki...
The Eurozone crisis, caused mainly by Greece defaulting on its debts, has forced the Greeks into desperate measures and leading the way are their winemakers.
Athens announced that all Greek wines will be flogged off at 50p a bottle, in spite of vi...
SEATTLE, Wa.--Several schools in the Northwest have rescinded job offers made to Amanda Knox to teach Italian after an Italian reporter published a story saying that Knox really had no command of the language, even after having spent four years in an...
LOS ANGELES - Producers, actors, crew members, hair stylists, and fake Playboy bunnies were all stunned as the highly-touted and extremely publicized new show The Playboy Club has just had the dubious distinction of being the very first casualty of t...
The hit TV show "The Biggest Loser" recently passed a milestone by airing it's 180th episode with no fatal incidents.
A spokesman for the show said he "was sure someone would have had a stroke or heart attack by now, or just strangled one of th...
Wall Street has been closed for business whilst crowds go on a tour of sites in the area. The call for people to join the tour gained an unexpected response after Police provided a kettle for the tourists.
'It used to be when America catches a col...
A five year old golden retriever from Fort Lauderdale Florida has filed a lawsuit against his owner citing that his former master violated his canine rights.
Sebastian, who has now left his owner and is residing with friends claims that his former...
Popular, and very camp, fashionista Gok Wan has requested to be added to the 999 emergency services list.
"Well, honey," said Gok (he insisted on being called just by his first name), "there are a lot of women out there that need my help. I just c...
Holly Madison, who qualified recently as a self-styled celebrity (please drop the "t" when saying the word "celebrity" out loud) as a result of making a prat of herself on national television (lack of) reality show, was today refused insurance for he...
In a special episode of the Hairy Bikers where they teamed up with the remaining Fat Lady, Clarissa Dickinson Wright, alert deaf viewers spotted that the subtitles for the show were interspersed with adverts for a popular bingo web site.
"We were...
Manchester - A rather flea-bitten mog with iffy ratting credentials is all that stands between David Cameron and immediate repatriation Home Secretary Theresa May has told the Conservative Conference.
The 60-something politician - known as Cat Wom...
Britney Spears, Lady Gaga, LeAnn Rimes and many other leading pop artists are all the creation of two computer support technicians from Pittsburg, it was claimed today.
In an exclusive interview in Melody Maker, Dwayne Poindexter and Dwight P. La...
The Discovery Institute, the For Prophets organisation set up to preach and teach about intelligent design, has decided the time is right for a junior wing to the movement after repeated failures to convince anybody with an IQ above minus fifty that...
It was the fermented apples that did it, the moose claimed, but some suspected that he had been sipping the bubbly for quite some time and was simply on a bender.
Anyway, as he awaited rescue from the tree, the moose cheerfully entertained one a...
A row between the Treasury and health experts over NHS cuts descended into a squabble about TV quiz show University Challenge last night.
The row had escalated earlier in the day after a group of health experts published criticisms of the Governme...
HOLLYWOOD - The mere fact that the beautifully sexy and talented dancer Kristen Cavallari was even in the bottom three was shocking enough for the Dancing With The Stars judges as well as the audience members.
But when host Tom Bergeron named Kris...
London - British Rocker/Rapper/and unknown other genres man Artois Armond Gordon is up in arms over a recent review and dismissal of his self proclaimed classic Envelope of Urine.
Writer for The Spoof, Ellie James, reviewed Envelope of Urine for...
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock was left reeling last night, when he returned home from work, only to find that he is not actually a real person, and even more devastatingly, to discover that not only is his name not actually his own, but that it was i...
At a press conference this afternoon, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie put the final nail in the coffin that he had put the final nail in last week by declaring he was not running for President of the Unites States.
Reporters, like horny college...
New York- Today, reporters at the city's most prestigious newspaper office kept working as usual as protestors from the Occupy Wall Street movement set up a base camp in their building.
A protestor who goes by Greg stated that he and a few of his...
NASHVILLE - Hank Williams Jr., has hollered out "Are You Ready For Some Football?" on The Monday Night Football Show for the past 20 years, but this past Monday night the old country boy didn't.
ESPN pulled him off the show after Hank Jr., had ear...