Funny story:  Professor Norton Folgate's Theory on Starlings

Professor Norton Folgate's Theory on Starlings

In the sometime occasional series by Professor Norton Folgate there have been many fascinating and intriguing topics and today's is no exception. Today we contemplate the joys and dangers of witnessing Starlings in huge numbers. "Now is the time of year to see millions of Starlings. Well it is if you live somewhere like Ham Wall, near Glastonbury or somewhere else where they all roost. In...
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Funny story:  Herman Cain Tells Politico  Reporter To "Occupy This"

Herman Cain Tells Politico Reporter To "Occupy This"

WASHINGTON - The usually good natured and smiling Herman Cain, obviously tired of answering questions concerning his alleged sexual harassment of two or three nymphet sparrows who claim that Mr. Cain was trying to hit on them while he was President o...
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Funny story:  Mitt Romney Converts from Mormon to Evangelicalism

Mitt Romney Converts from Mormon to Evangelicalism

Following in the footsteps of President Barack Obama who ran out of Jeremiah Wright's Trinity United Church of Christ in order to become President in 2008 today Mitt Romney was born again into Evangelicism. In a public dunking in the Jordan River tod...
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Funny story:  Cain:  "For every NO, I got seven YESSES!"

Cain: "For every NO, I got seven YESSES!"

Herman Cain took the podium triumphantly at an announced press conference this morning. The room was filled with his Tea Party supporters. Cain stated: "For every NO, there were seven YESSES!" The crowd roared its approval. Cain: "Would you want...
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Funny story:  Bank of America Backs Down From Debit Card Fees

Bank of America Backs Down From Debit Card Fees

Bank of America spokesman Bill M. Tweed released a statement to the financial media this morning outlining the reversal of the recent bank policy of instituting a monthly fee of $5.00 to customers using debit cards. "Our customers have shared thei...
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Funny story:  New Luddite Party Wants To Sew It Up

New Luddite Party Wants To Sew It Up

Special to INS - Liam Breton, who fell short in his attempt to incite a national rebellion, has decided to run for U.S. President on the Luddite Party ticket. The Luddite Party was founded by Breton in response to the failure of the major politic...
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Funny story:  UK policy on immigration slammed for including legislation on dog owners

UK policy on immigration slammed for including legislation on dog owners

UK immigration policy was once again the subject of abject ridicule today when it was revealed that new legislation on tightening the law on immigration featured rules targeting those intending to bring dogs with them into the country. Under prop...
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Funny story:  Recipe for Disaster

Recipe for Disaster

Take one dictatorship posing as a democracy Slow roast until the heart is black and the meat is thirsty Add two or three cracked liberalists Whisk together with million dollar missiles Pour in a few hundred thousand dead soldiers And a good pinch of murdered women and children Let it rise for a few years in a lukewarm temperature of media hype and propaganda masquerading as fact Nuke it al...
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Funny story:  X-Factor Girl Band have to change their name...again!

X-Factor Girl Band have to change their name...again!

Hapless X-Factor girl band 'Little Mix' have been forced into yet another name change after it emerged that 'Little Mix' is also the name of a brand of dog food for miniature dog breeds. The band are said to be mortified by the discovery and will...
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Funny story:  Frodo Baggins Finally Loses His Virginity

Frodo Baggins Finally Loses His Virginity

The afterparty was great. After the afterparty was even better. Well, at least for 50-year old former virgin, Frodo Baggins. In a pretty dramatic finish to a celebration of S-Day, or victory over Sauron Day, Frodo Baggins was caught in the act of...
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Funny story:  John Terry finally apologises?

John Terry finally apologises?

John Terry came forward today to make an apologetic statement regarding the race row that has torn football apart. "I am deeply sorry, for the upset I have caused over the alleged racial comments I might, or might not have made. My conduct has cau...
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Funny story:  Jealous UK woman throws bucket of cold water at hot pussy!

Jealous UK woman throws bucket of cold water at hot pussy!

A jealous UK woman named Edna (name changed for legal reasons) was sure her hubby was having an affair with some strange pussy, who's name just happened to be Dolores, (name also changed, but not for legal reasons this time) who loves licking milky,...
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Funny story:  Herman Cain not interested in 'small insignificant states' unless they're bombing us

Herman Cain not interested in 'small insignificant states' unless they're bombing us

WASHINGTON, D.C.--Herman Cain has taken a slight lead in the Republican nomination contest, but is currently the leader by a large margin in the Gaffe Factor. When asked who the president of Uzbekistan was, Cain replied, "When they ask me who is t...
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Funny story:  Sarah Palin Tells Herman Cain To Hang In There Cause It'll Get Lots Worse

Sarah Palin Tells Herman Cain To Hang In There Cause It'll Get Lots Worse

WASILLA, Alaska - Sarah Palin recently confided some personal observations to one of her neighbors, but not the one next door, Jebediah McGillicuddy, who wrote the exposé book on her that sunk the hell out of her political fishing boat. According...
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Funny story:  Pastafarianism to be taught in Creationist Faith Schools

Pastafarianism to be taught in Creationist Faith Schools

In a landmark ruling the fabricated religion Pastafarianism, the religion of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, is to be taught in Physics in US Creationist Faith Schools. "We are quite upset," said leading Creationist, Michael Behe. "For...
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Funny story:  'Spooky' children's ditty clue to EU fiasco

'Spooky' children's ditty clue to EU fiasco

London - A 'prescient' scribble in a 1930s primary school history textbook found smouldering in a skip outside the EU's London HQ has shed new light on the Euro mess as G20 heads of government continued their Cannes of Worms summit today. 'Germany...
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Funny story:  On hold? There's an app for that

On hold? There's an app for that

Apple Core Labs are releasing their latest app to the relief of thousands of people across the world, iQueue (pronounced IQ) has been designed with the intention of solving that interminable problem of the modern age: Being on hold. "This is a vit...
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Funny story:  Shame, Stupidity and Rotten Fruit Follow NBA Negotiations

Shame, Stupidity and Rotten Fruit Follow NBA Negotiations

Following months of what fans might call ridiculous and economically insulting negotiations over how much money players or NBA team owners actually deserve, one grass roots group of blue-collar fans is letting them all know exactly how they feel, wit...
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Funny story:  Kim Kardashian Still Pining for Bond Girl Role

Kim Kardashian Still Pining for Bond Girl Role

Following a personal appeal to Daniel Craig and a failed screen test on the set of Bond 23 yesterday, Kim Kardashian has reportedly created a demo video to highlight her other talents in the hope of being reconsidered for the role of the next Bond Gi...
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Funny story:  Government bring in tax on Gay Men

Government bring in tax on Gay Men

Chancellor George Osboring has put forward plans to tax Gay men. His new stealth tax will be brought into force in the next tax year without a commons vote. Mr Osboring said; "Gay men spend far to much money on curtains cushions rugs piercings and...
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Funny story:  Democracy in Greece Horror

Democracy in Greece Horror

Shock at the G20 Summit in Cannes as the Greek Prime Minister disturbed world order by deciding to ask the Greek people what they thought about the deal he made made with Europe over their future. 'We all believe in democracy' blurted Sarkorsy 'bu...
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Funny story:  Fears growing over potential Westlife reunion

Fears growing over potential Westlife reunion

The world of showbiz was today rocked to it's very foundations, to its actual core, in fact (get on with it - Editor) er, ok, er with the threatened possibility of a Westlife reunion. Still reeling from the non-split in 2004 when Brian McFadden qu...
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Funny story:  Jailed cricketers who made the sport almost interesting, set to appeal

Jailed cricketers who made the sport almost interesting, set to appeal

Three former Pakistani internationals Cricketers jailed for their part in an elaborate conspiracy to elevate their sport from tedious to only slightly less tedious, have declared their intent to appeal against the decision. Former captain Salman B...
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Funny story:  A True Diary of Woe - Part Twenty-six

A True Diary of Woe - Part Twenty-six

A diary of one man's utter failure, depression, frustration, cock-ups, depression and impecuniousness, starting in August 1947 Chapter 42 - Guarding the Submarine Pens So there we were, me and Dave, a lad from Newcastle, posted along with many others to man the outer defences (wire fencing) around the submarine base, in response to some threat or other received by the top brass. Of course...
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Funny story:  The Cannes Sham Time-share Scam

The Cannes Sham Time-share Scam

A diplomatic storm is brewing as leaders of the G20 nations gathered in Cannes on the promise of a bit of a chat about the economy, a slap up buffet and some of the best wine that the local branch of Carrefour could offer. Instead, sources from withi...
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Funny story:  Bank Of America Is Bullied By Recent College Graduate Single-Handedly And Overturns Stupidity

Bank Of America Is Bullied By Recent College Graduate Single-Handedly And Overturns Stupidity

WASHINGTON DC - Recent college graduate Molly Katchpole who not only is broke like a joke but also an aspiring politician earned her ticket to the White House when she single-handedly pulled the nations second largest bank's hands out of her pockets...
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Funny story:  NBA Player Loses First Month of Paycheck Moves Into Mom's House And Has To Sleep In His Childhood Bed

NBA Player Loses First Month of Paycheck Moves Into Mom's House And Has To Sleep In His Childhood Bed

NEW YORK CITY - Whether it's true or not that half of the NBA players are starving, one thing's for sure, twenty-five year old New York Knick unemployed backup guard to the backup guard Andy Rautins is moving back to mom's house. "I'm not happy ha...
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Funny story:  Children's Books Banished To The Top Shelf

Children's Books Banished To The Top Shelf

In a move which has outraged traditionalists in children's education, many UK book shops have removed a number of much loved children's favourites from shelves and placed them in the adult section of their shops. Books have been withdrawn on the grou...
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Funny story:  Justin Bieber Tells Selena Gomez That The Baby Does Not Look Anything At All Like Him

Justin Bieber Tells Selena Gomez That The Baby Does Not Look Anything At All Like Him

VENICE BEACH - Justin Bieber was having breakfast at Tacos, Tacos, and Mucho More Tacos in Venice Beach with his mentor Usher when he was approached by a reporter for Hollywood Innuendo. Ty Tickler with HI asked Bieber about the recent allegations...
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Funny story:  X-Factor: The Real Reason Why The Judges Sent The Ten-Member Group InTENsity Packing

X-Factor: The Real Reason Why The Judges Sent The Ten-Member Group InTENsity Packing

LOS ANGELES - X-Factor finally got down to having the viewers vote for their favorite performers. No doubt that the leading vote getter's were surely Melanie Amaro, Josh Krajcik, LeRoy Belle, and Stacy Francis. On the other side of the coin and...
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Funny story:  Dorking Crab Boat Mothballed

Dorking Crab Boat Mothballed

It's bad news from Dorking, as the town's last remaining Bering Sea crab boat has been mothballed, due to financial constraints, and being unable to compete with their Alaskan counterparts, such as those featured on Discovery Channel's 'Deadliest Cat...
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Funny story:  Study Reveals, Everybody Loves a Vagina

Study Reveals, Everybody Loves a Vagina

Biologists of the Human Anatomy have done a world wide survey as to, what is the most popular body part, the resounding overwhelming response has been the vagina. Adam was seduced into bondage by vagina against the advice of God. Now that's seduction, to choose vagina over God. Paris Hilton flashes her vagina and the world stops spinning on its axis. Lindsay Lohan flashes a little gas...
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Funny story:  Rev Jesse Jackson Calls Cain "Poozle Chasing Uncle Tom Honky Loving Republican"

Rev Jesse Jackson Calls Cain "Poozle Chasing Uncle Tom Honky Loving Republican"

CHICAGO - Jumping into the raging controversy regarding Herman Cain's alleged sexual harassment of two or more female workers, the Reverend Jesse Jackson today dumped more coals on the fire by calling Cain a "Poozle chasing Uncle Tom honky loving Rep...
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Funny story:  Early Migrating Humans Fought Sabre Toothed Tigers To Settle In Burnley

Early Migrating Humans Fought Sabre Toothed Tigers To Settle In Burnley

Archaeological evidence supports the theory that the earliest human migrants battled woolly mammoths, sabre toothed tigers, wild lions, hippos, and wild boar, in their quest to reach the Lancashire settlement of Burnley. Historians agree that the...
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Funny story:  Ghostly Image Spotted In Burnley Double-Yolker Fried Egg

Ghostly Image Spotted In Burnley Double-Yolker Fried Egg

Burnley man, Charlie Splutterthwaite got more than he bargained for this morning as he went into the kitchen to prepare a fried egg sandwich. Cracking an egg into the frying pan, Splutterthwaite was surprised and delighted when the egg turned out to...
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