Flower, a turkey pardoned by President Bush in November of 2007, is now accused of murdering a family of 5 in upper New York State. The Norton family of Rowling, New York, were enjoying a quiet Sunday afternoon at home when the alleged crime took pla...
This is a piece I have written for a certain African tyrant who will be easily recognised by the perceptive reader. This is no spoof. It is a heartfelt piece.
Some of the content might be disturbing for the more sensitive or less bloodthirsty reader, so be warned. It was never my intention when I penned these words to cause offence or to upset anyone. What I did want to do was to give expressi...
Glasgow - A Scottish Environment Agency canteen sausage roll sent the geiger counter ballistic this afternoon prompting an immediate phone call to Buckingham Palace.
"We advise an immediate change of pantiliner, Ma'am," the Government's chief scie...
Today, in the wake of the passing and publication of the revolutionary new budget repair bill, the Walker administration unveiled "Citizen Gamers", a new initiative for disseminating important policy and budgetary information to the public using vide...
At exactly 00.01 hours on April 1st a particularly nasty virus - part Trojan, part Worm, part BLING (Bin Laden is a Ninja Ghost), will hit computer, laptop, and even Blackberry users worldwide and will remain active until 2012.
Known only as E=mc2...
The world's biggest supermarket chain, W**mart, is being sued by some of its female employees because of sexual discrimination and "gender bending"!
It seems that W**mart prefers 1st: hetero males; 2nd: gay men, 3rd: transvestites 4th: lesbians, 5...
The Cosmos - (You Canna Be Sirius Mess): The entire Syrian Administration has resigned following public dismay at the craft's Dome of the Rock transit over Israel in last month.
The 30-strong Canis Major Federation cabinet was booted out - er...su...
Have you ever wondered why family photos in Movies look so unconvincing? No? Well neither have we, but that's not going to stop us writing about it.
Family photos in movies. You know the ones, images of the leading cast members badly photoshopped together in an attempt to create a fictiontalised quasi-life between two jobbing actors who probably only met at the first read-through. Perhaps it w...
The snake missing from the Bronx Zoo has been found at the site of the Conservative Iowa Caucus! No one can determine how the snake made it from New York to Iowa but speculation is that it somehow boarded an airplane bound for De Moines, possibly ass...
News has reached us that, before Paul the Psychic Octopus passed on to the great blue yonder, scientists in Germany had a plan to clone him. After all, they had nothing to lose and everything to gain.
This top secret scientific plan was passed on...
HOLLYWOOD - It was an evening when the male contestants on Dancing With The Stars all really brought their "A-Game."
And when the dancing dust had settled the three top judges vote getter's were wrestling champion Chris Jericho and his partner Che...
LOS ANGELES - Casey Abrams, the American Idol contestant who is the first to ever appear on the show with a 'stand up bass' is ecstatic at the fact that he has been nominated for an Emmy Award.
Abrams was notified by certified mail that The Academ...
Cheryl has said that she does not want to go back on to UK X-Factor as a judge after becoming a big 'talent' in the US. Simon Cowell as good as 'promised' her a place on the panel of US X-Factor. Cheryl is angered that he promised her something whi...
Satan, the Prince of Darkness, is to set up a call centre in Gainsborough, the call centre capital of England.
"It's the logical place," said Aleister Crowley, spokesman for Hell Incorporated. "Gainsborough is already Hell on Earth, so there are p...
The wire services are reporting today that a robot will be the GOP nominee for president in 2012!
The Koch brothers, long known as the principal backers of the conservatives in the GOP, have contracted with IBM to develop a robot similar to Watso...
It was a moment the world was waiting for as President Obama prepared to take the stage in what some have described as his shining moment as he prepared to discuss recent actions involving on again off again actions involving middle east unrest and...
CABO SAN LUCAS, Mexico - Renee Zellweger was vacationing down in sunny old Mexico with an old high school friend from Katy, Texas identified as Palapita Underhook.
While sunning at the beach in front of The El Super Matador Hotel Zellweger, who wa...
LOS ANGELES - After months and months of sweating out the possibility that he could end up in prison, the judge in the Mel "From Hell" Gibson - Oksana "The Pretty Pianist" Grigorieva assault case has ruled that the "Mad Aussie" will be placed on prob...
Troubled Man City star Mario Balotelli has been involved in another incident with the club.
Its emerged that, only days after being sent off in the Champions League tie against Dynamo Kiev, the striker is alleged to have thrown a dart at a youth p...
DETROIT - Lady Gaga was in the "Motor City" taking a tour of one of the city's two carburetor plants.
Ever since she was a little girl growing up in New York City, Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta had always, for some strange unknown reason, bee...
British singer Adele's second album 21 has matched Madonna's 'The Immaculate Collection' by spending 9 weeks at the top of the UK album chart.
The London based soul singer has based her career and persona on the American legend and other similarit...
Traditionalists are preparing themselves after it was revealed that a new BBC version of 'Wuthering Heights' will contain swearing,other industrial language and will be put in a contemporary setting.
The Radio 3 production will be littered with ex...