Funny story:  Terrorists to receive acting lessons from Charlie Sheen

Terrorists to receive acting lessons from Charlie Sheen

"Action" is what the Hollywood A-Lister Charlie Sheen shouts to the 30 or so men on a boiling film set in Afghanistan, but far from directing a new film about the war in Afghanistan, Charlie Sheen has been giving acting lessons to Al-Qaeda. Havin...
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Funny story:  Madonna And Barack Obama To Collaborate In Song And Dance Routine Of Mr. Bojangles At Super Bowl

Madonna And Barack Obama To Collaborate In Song And Dance Routine Of Mr. Bojangles At Super Bowl

NEW YORK CITY - Confirming a not-so-well-kept secret, the NFL and NBC announced today that President Barack Obama will indeed collaborate with the Material Woman in a song and dance rendition of Mr. Bojangles during the half-time show of Super Bowl X...
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Funny story:  Fascist care home calls in cops as son takes Mum home for Christmas dinner

Fascist care home calls in cops as son takes Mum home for Christmas dinner

Somerset - The news from the UK is grim tonight amid confirmation that the Third Reich has seized control of an old people's home and is persecuting residents' relatives over basic human rights. At the heart of the controversy is a concerned man w...
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Funny story:  NYPD Threatens To Shut Down Times Square On New Year's Eve

NYPD Threatens To Shut Down Times Square On New Year's Eve

Police in New York have announced a plan to block the city's New Year's Eve celebration, contending that its crowd control responsibilities in Times Square interfere with a more essential duty. "The public forgets that New York is one of the world...
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Funny story:  The Sales of IPhone 4S. Skyrocket by 50% after Abusive Message

The Sales of IPhone 4S. Skyrocket by 50% after Abusive Message

Apple, the producers of the iPhone 4S should be very pleased with themselves after rave reviews of the latest smart phone with has the ability to talk back to you. With so much positive feedback, the phone has become a market leader and is certain to...
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Funny story:  Dorking to get an international airport?

Dorking to get an international airport?

The small Surrey town of Dorking is to get London's fifth international airport. Although officially part of Gatwick, the Dorking airport will have all its own facilities, including duty free and a Tie Rack. "This extension to Gatwick will crea...
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Funny story:  Jim Carrey Mimes His Way Into Love

Jim Carrey Mimes His Way Into Love

Jim Carrey has been active on the dating scene recently, culminating in his new role as the strict sugardaddy to Russian college student Anastasia Vitkina, more affectionately known as "the whole wheat sugar baby." They met this Winter in New York...
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Funny story:  European Central Bank Restores Euro Confidence in 10 Trillion Recapitalization with Hasbro

European Central Bank Restores Euro Confidence in 10 Trillion Recapitalization with Hasbro

FRANKFURT, Germany - The European Central Bank announced at a joint press conference today with Hasbro (NASDAQ: HAS) a new partnership to restore credibility to the European money supply and ensure the future safety of the Eurozone. The plan is to...
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Funny story:  'Toronto' Mayor Rob Ford Gets Into The 'Eggnog'

'Toronto' Mayor Rob Ford Gets Into The 'Eggnog'

Early Christmas morning, police were summoned to the suburban 'castle' of Mayor Rob Ford about a reported serious domestic dispute. It was the second such call in many months for the popular 'potty mouthed prince'. On Oct. 25, less than 15 hours a...
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Funny story:  Taarabt and Chamakh to eat for Morocco in the Africa Cup.

Taarabt and Chamakh to eat for Morocco in the Africa Cup.

Queens Park Rangers' Adel Taarabt and Arsenal's Marouane Chamakh are both included in Morocco's 23-man squad for the Africa Cup of Nations finals. Chamakh has been selected despite only managing to eat a tagine just once in eight starts for Arsena...
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Funny story:  Kelly Clarkson Is Shocked At The Haters Remarks Regarding Her Support of Ron Paul

Kelly Clarkson Is Shocked At The Haters Remarks Regarding Her Support of Ron Paul

WEST HOLLYWOOD - Popular songstress Kelly Clarkson has stated that she cannot believe the mean-spirited comments and remarks that she has been receiving on Twitter from individuals who lashed out at her for her remarks in support of GOP presidential...
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Funny story:  The Adventure Of The Missing Christmas Goose Pt II; A Festive Shylock Humes Mystery

The Adventure Of The Missing Christmas Goose Pt II; A Festive Shylock Humes Mystery

Having clambered down from the scaffolding, I made my way to the window, where my friend Shylock Humes was looking out onto a wintry Candlestick Maker Street. "Yes, doctor", said Humes, "this is the carriage I was expecting." "But there is something amiss here!" I ejaculated, and immediately regretted it. Mrs Dudson was away visiting her cousin Effie at Ecclefechan. How would we clear up in...
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Funny story:  The Mass Exodus From GoDaddy Continues As Experts Predict It Could Soon Become GoneDaddy

The Mass Exodus From GoDaddy Continues As Experts Predict It Could Soon Become GoneDaddy

NEW YORK CITY - The once proud domain king is now starting to look more and more like the domain jester as the nationwide Dump GoDaddy Day boycott has resulted in over 70,000 customers leaving the world's largest web hosting site. A spokesperson f...
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Funny story:  Arab League to Send Observer Team to Iowa Caucus

Arab League to Send Observer Team to Iowa Caucus

CAIRO, Egypt - The Arab League is preparing to send 20 monitors to ensure peace in the imminent Iowa Caucus and monitor the situation in case of trouble emerging. According to Nabil El Araby, the General Secretary of the Arab League, "We are conce...
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Funny story:  Thierry Henry Nears Arsenal Return - and more old gunners want in

Thierry Henry Nears Arsenal Return - and more old gunners want in

Arsene Wenger has confirmed Thierry Henry will sign a two-month deal to return to Arsenal if insurance agreements can be worked out with New York Red Bulls. Wenger wants Henry to fill the supporting striker void which will be left when Chamakh and...
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Funny story:  NASA with novel idea: traveling to moon will get kids interested in math and science

NASA with novel idea: traveling to moon will get kids interested in math and science

CAPE CANAVERAL, Fl.- Although President Obama insists that trying to land on an asteroid would be much more interesting, NASA is pushing ahead with its plans to revisit an old friend: the moon. Like a tipsy uncle at a family gathering, NASA is con...
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Funny story:  'A London brothel called The Vatican' revealed in Thatcher archives

'A London brothel called The Vatican' revealed in Thatcher archives

London - Newly released papers under the 30 year rule show officials turned a blind eye to the existence of the Central London cat house, it has been revealed. St Pussycats made a ton of dosh and even won a government bite mark - er...kite mark! -...
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Funny story:  BBC Tells Football League Fans To "Shove It!"

BBC Tells Football League Fans To "Shove It!"

Fans of Football League clubs have been told to "shove it" after they complained about the lack of BBC coverage over the festive period. Highlights and goal packages from matches in the three leagues below the Premier League are usually shown afte...
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Funny story:  Thatcher considered abandoning Britain

Thatcher considered abandoning Britain

Recently released files from the national archives from 1981 suggest that the government of the time considered a plan to abandon Britain to its fate, leaving it in a state of "managed decline". The secret documents have just been released, following...
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Funny story:  Slap Happy Holidays

Slap Happy Holidays

Newark, NJ - Traveling anywhere these days can be quite the never ending, here to there, and, hopefully, all the way back, painful experience. All of which, of course, gets a decided, rollover-like irritation boost, of sorts, during the holidays. And, especially if, by chance, said travel plans takes you along a sometimes, anything but unamused, international-like route. That, more often t...
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Funny story:  Badger Cull Blamed on Panda

Badger Cull Blamed on Panda

A Dorking vet called Barry Badger was arrested yesterday following the suspicious death of Mrs Gertie Grimbottom, 67, of Dorking. Mrs Grimbottom was taken to the vet by her grandson Herbert, 11, who asked to have her put down. Badger initially ref...
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Funny story:  Auld Lang Syne Lyrics A Mystery

Auld Lang Syne Lyrics A Mystery

Most Britons make up the lyrics to the traditional New Year ditty Auld Lang Syne a survey has discovered. Researchers discovered that 37 per cent of us don't know any of the words to the song, written by Robert Burns in 1788. Most of the adults...
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Funny story:  Santa in trouble with law

Santa in trouble with law

Nome, Alaska. In dramatic scenes here today, Father Christmas (otherwise known as Santa Claus) has been detained by Police on suspicion of being extremely inebriated while pursuing his annual delivery of Christmas presents to eager children all over...
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Funny story:  Pittsburgh Steelers Quarterback Ben Roethlisberger Finally Agrees To Change His Last Name

Pittsburgh Steelers Quarterback Ben Roethlisberger Finally Agrees To Change His Last Name

PITTSBURGH - After adamantly stating that hell would freeze over and all of the Kardashians would move to Armenia before he would change his last name Ben Roethlisberger has changed his mind. "Big Ben" as he is known by his Tweeter fans has been t...
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Funny story:  Top Ten Rundown - Most Annoying News Items From 2011

Top Ten Rundown - Most Annoying News Items From 2011

Many things annoy us, from women leaving the toilet seat down, public transport, the price of fuel and annoying junk mail, to women who complain you left the toilet seat up, family members who come visiting and never quite seem to know when it's time they fucked off, taxes, computer viruses and people who talk absolute bollocks about subjects they know nothing about. Here's our chart rundown of...
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