Funny story:  Buffon's Needle Proves That God = π. OR Randomness Can Not Exist.

Buffon's Needle Proves That God = π. OR Randomness Can Not Exist.

Write the following statements on a rock: Randomness Does not Exist. The Key To The Unified Field Theory, And God Himself, is Pi. Buffon's Needle --easily one of the oldest tests of randomness, and problems in the field of geometrical probability-- yields one of the most amazing things this writer has ever seen. Because from the so-called random output of the test, the same result can consis...
View 'Buffon's Needle Proves That God = π. OR Randomness Can Not Exist.'
Funny story:  Lindsay Lohan Says She Is Absolutely Furious At The Judge For Sentencing Her To Prison - Well Duh!

Lindsay Lohan Says She Is Absolutely Furious At The Judge For Sentencing Her To Prison - Well Duh!

LOS ANGELES - Hollywood starlet-spoiled brat Lindsay Lohan told her attorney Shawtessa "Jolly" Holley that she does not appreciate the fact that Los Angeles Superior Court Judge Stephanie "The Shark" Sautner has sentenced her to 120 days in Prison.
View 'Lindsay Lohan Says She Is Absolutely Furious At The Judge For Sentencing Her To Prison - Well Duh!'
Funny story:  Katie Couric Makes It Official - She Is Quitting The CBS Evening News And Explains Exactly Why

Katie Couric Makes It Official - She Is Quitting The CBS Evening News And Explains Exactly Why

CARPINTERIA, California - Katie Couric, anchor woman on The CBS Evening News was addressing an assembly of future television news media students at the highly prestigious Left Coast College in Carpinteria, California. She was asked which world figure that she had interviewed stood out in her mind as the most interesting. Couric giggled and said that it would have to be North Korea'a Kim Jong...
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Funny story:  USA Toupé?

USA Toupé?

Washington DC: Entrepreneur, television personality and Republican presidential hopeful Donald Trump is facing claims that his hair was born outside of the United States, thereby rendering it ineligible to hold the nation's highest office. Liberal...
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Funny story:  Satan, Gloria Allred Announce Terms of Deal With Patriots' QB Tom Brady.

Satan, Gloria Allred Announce Terms of Deal With Patriots' QB Tom Brady.

Satan, CEO of Hell, Hades and the Los Angeles Dodgers, joined attorney Gloria Allred during one of her hourly press conferences to announce that he has reached terms with Boston Patriots' QB Tom Brady, guaranteeing him his place in the Pro Football H...
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Funny story:  Daily Mail Liz Taylor 'exclusive' sourced to Spoof news story

Daily Mail Liz Taylor 'exclusive' sourced to Spoof news story

London - One month after a Spoof news writer revealed the existence of Liz Taylor's secret love child the Daily Mail has wowed its readers with an exclusive. Queen Mudder's original March 27 Spoof news item laid bare the sordid details of Taylor's...
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Funny story:  Joe Zee To Redo Obama White House

Joe Zee To Redo Obama White House

Joe Zee, of Sundance Channel's All On The Line, who manages to resuscitate failing fashion houses, giving them a second chance, might just have a look-see at Barack Obama's White House. Yes, we can! Questionable the second time around. All On T...
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Funny story:  Hubble Space Telescope Sees Giant Marijuana Leaf In Outer Space

Hubble Space Telescope Sees Giant Marijuana Leaf In Outer Space

Houston, TX - NASA is reporting today that a gigantic marijuana leaf has been spotted on the other side of the Universe. The seven-pointed 'leaf' is actually eight galaxies coming together in a colossal collision. The Hubble Space Telescope spotted...
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Funny story:  The Comedy Entertainers Pecking Order

The Comedy Entertainers Pecking Order

1.: Revered, dead comics: Richard Pryor, Redd Foxx, Carlin, etc. 2.: A-List movie comics: Jim Carrey, Sandler, Stiller, etc. 3.: A-List TV comics: Seinfeld, Steve Carell, etc. 4.: A-List Stand-up Comics: Chris Rock... Uh, Chris Rock. 5.: Local-Regional stand-up comics. 6.: Comedy book writers 7.: TV writers 8.: Radio comics (O&A, Stern, etc.) 9.: That guy in your offic...
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Funny story:  6 Successful Italian Americans You Don't Know Sh-t About (Part 2)

6 Successful Italian Americans You Don't Know Sh-t About (Part 2)

How do you make a Dago successful in business? Give him a gun! Bwaa, haa, haa. That is f--king hysterical! 6 Successful Italian Americans You Don't Know Sh-t About (Part 2) 2.) Amadeo Giannini (1870 - 1949) founder in 1904 of Bank of Italy, which later became Bank of America, the largest bank in the United States. Amadeo Giannini --whose parents were Italian immigrants from Favale di Ma...
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Funny story:  6 Successful Italian Americans You Don't Know Sh-t About  (Part  1)

6 Successful Italian Americans You Don't Know Sh-t About (Part 1)

How do you make a Dago successful in business? Give him a gun! Bwaa, haa, haa. That is f--king hysterical! Here's six Italian-Americans who succeeded in business without having their competitors killed, the body thrown in a cement mixer, and poured into the foundation of a Howard Johnson's. (Because, ya know, that's what happened to that f--ker Hoffa. We all know where he is. We just can't tell...
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Funny story:  Wikileaks Reveals Details of Kate Middleton's Wedding Dress

Wikileaks Reveals Details of Kate Middleton's Wedding Dress

With only three days to go until the royal wedding, Wikileaks have released full details of Kate Middleton's dress. The dress was to be kept secret, but a naughty tailor at Buckingham Palace is said to have sold the design to internet whistle-blowers...
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Funny story:  New Poll:  More Americans Believe In Easter Bunny Than Obama Born In USA

New Poll: More Americans Believe In Easter Bunny Than Obama Born In USA

The new Rasmussen Pole today revealed that only 38% of voting age Americans believe that President Barack Obama was born in the USA. The same poll showed that over 42% of those polled believe in the Easter Bunny. When asked the question: If the...
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Funny story:  Celebrities 'Up the Junction'

Celebrities 'Up the Junction'

Several celebrities, we cannot name even in a joke, are being protected up the junction. They are known by many as the Clapham Sextet, because they have been up the junction at least six times. 'It's super up there' said one well known celebrity w...
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Funny story:  New Book Reveals That Lassie Was A Right Old Dog

New Book Reveals That Lassie Was A Right Old Dog

Some shocking revelations emerge in Seymour Basilca's recently released biography, "Lassie Was A Right Old Dog," alleging that Hollywood's all time canine favourite was no better than any other old dog. The book portrays Lassie as a hard drinking,...
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Funny story:  Nixon, September 24, 1973: "The Italians. They are not like us.  Difference is they smell different, they look different, act different."

Nixon, September 24, 1973: "The Italians. They are not like us. Difference is they smell different, they look different, act different."

President Richard M. Nixon, September 24, 1973, while conversing with aide John Ehrlichman about rewarding groups that had voted for him. Nixon: "The Italians. We mustn't forget the Italians. Must do something for them. The, ah, we forget them. They are not like us. Difference is they smell different, they look different, act different. After all, you can't blame them. Oh no. Can't do...
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Funny story:  Avram Grant Is A Right Old Tramp!

Avram Grant Is A Right Old Tramp!

Beleaguered West Ham United manager Avram Grant, has been dubbed 'a right old tramp' by the club's long-suffering fans, who have had to put up with the Israeli's hangdog expression and dour personality all season long. And some fans have even foun...
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Funny story:  UK suicide help desks implode as Royal Wedding approaches!

UK suicide help desks implode as Royal Wedding approaches!

The forthcoming Royal Wedding is driving Brits absolutely nuts and now it's been officially confirmed. Mental institutes, suicide help desks, psychiatrists, emergency wards, morgues, funeral parlours, etc, are being overloaded by people sick to d...
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Funny story:  The disasters of Capitalism

The disasters of Capitalism

The horrible problems created by capitalism that Karl Marx tried to fix in Europe have occurred again but in America after a decade since Marx first wrote his Communist Manifesto. Marx who was born into a wealthy family was concerned about his European brothers and sisters suffering under the deplorable conditions created by Capitalism. Two armed men who were desperate to pay for their gran...
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Funny story:  "It's Gwyneth Paltrow Who's The C**t Here" Says 76 Year Old Gran

"It's Gwyneth Paltrow Who's The C**t Here" Says 76 Year Old Gran

76 year old grandmother of eight, Jean Vincent, of Hapton near Burnley in the UK reacted angrily to Gwyneth Paltrow's outrageous dropping of the 'C' word on Chelsea Handler's US TV show. Paltrow, feebly attempting to be risque and 'out there' drop...
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Funny story:  Donald Trump to build a golf course and village in Somerset

Donald Trump to build a golf course and village in Somerset

Donald Trump, American, billionaire tycoon and golf lover is set to rejuvenate a run down area of Somerset by building a state of the art golf course and village on the site of an old, derelict tin mine. The new golfing village will have it's own...
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Funny story:  Robert Pattinson Reveals Some Shocking Behind-The-Scenes Insights About His New Movie "Water For Elephants"

Robert Pattinson Reveals Some Shocking Behind-The-Scenes Insights About His New Movie "Water For Elephants"

CHICAGO - The star of the Twilight movies Rob Pattinson and his Water For Elephants co-star Reese Witherspoon were in Chicago promoting the highly touted circus themed motion picture which is set during The Great Depression. In the film RPattz sta...
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Funny story:  More fabulous Royal Wedding souvenirs announced

More fabulous Royal Wedding souvenirs announced

To celebrate the Royal Wedding of whatsisname to whodyamacallit at the church place in London, amongst many companies jumping on the bandwagon, er, producing fine items of memorabilia, the Pound-Doubler group of discount stores have announced a feast...
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Funny story:  Barrowboy takes the bus

Barrowboy takes the bus

When fourteen year old Reece Furness realised he had got on the wrong bus, heading for Dalton instead of Walney Island, he did what any youth from Barrow would do: he hijacked the bus. "I was scared for me life," said pensioner Betty Newbiggin. "T...
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Funny story:  Shock as BNP accused of going "bust"

Shock as BNP accused of going "bust"

Having run up debts of over half a million pounds, the BNP - the British Nazi Party - denies that it is going bust. According to BNP leader, Nick Nasty, and backed up by party accountant Fidelma Bookes, the party would never even dream of going bu...
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Funny story:  Susan Boyle to serenade newlyweds with 1964 Dixie Cups smash hit 'Chapel of Love'

Susan Boyle to serenade newlyweds with 1964 Dixie Cups smash hit 'Chapel of Love'

London - The Phil Spector No 1 featured in the 1994 box orifice blockbusta 'For Weddings & A Funeral' and has been specially requested by Wills and Kate to open Friday night's nuptial entertainment. Boyle, accompanied by backing vocals from th...
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Funny story:  Human cannonball 'was practising for royal wedding cake stunt'

Human cannonball 'was practising for royal wedding cake stunt'

Maidstone, Kent - Tragic human cannonball Max the Manx Crank had been booked to shoot out of a royal wedding cake this Friday reports have revealed. The 23 year-old was to have performed a Full Monty kind of surprise ejection (sic) based on the la...
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Funny story:  Kirstie & Phil in New XXX Rated Show

Kirstie & Phil in New XXX Rated Show

After the success of Location, Location, Location and the new Vacation, Vacation, Vacation, Kirstie & Phil are set to make a triple X rated show. The programme will feature Phil shagging Kirstie in a variety of positions in different rooms, ac...
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Funny story:  Hurricane Dodi to lash royal wedding

Hurricane Dodi to lash royal wedding

London - A compilation video of twenty-five men 'and Dodi Fayed' that Diana shagged during her marriage threatens to put a dampener on Friday's royal nuptials. News of 30 minute Royal YouBoob! channel footage of the Princess pleasuring herself has...
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Funny story:  Shock as Entire Celtic team resign

Shock as Entire Celtic team resign

Manager of Stalybridge Celtic, Jim Harvey, admitted his shock when he discovered that the entire team had resigned. "I was told by a text message," Harvey said in a press conference at the club's Bower Fold ground. "Chairman Rob Gorski sent it."...
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Funny story:  Dancing With The Stars: Ralph "The Karate Kid" Macchio's Partner Karina Smirnoff Takes A Very Nasty Fall During Their Live Performance

Dancing With The Stars: Ralph "The Karate Kid" Macchio's Partner Karina Smirnoff Takes A Very Nasty Fall During Their Live Performance

HOLLYWOOD - There have been more spills, falls, lost shoes, and popped off bras during this year's edition of Dancing With The Stars than any of the previous years. Several weeks ago Maksim Chmerkovskiy fell after he was kicked in his Ukrainian family jewels by Kirstie Alley's humongous left foot. The following week Kirstie lost one of her shoes after Maks flung her across the dance floor a...
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Funny story:  "Russ Well" said to be preparing his coming-out

"Russ Well" said to be preparing his coming-out

Earthly life can have its benefits: cornflakes 'n' dried seaweed for breakfast, some hot desert worms for lunch and fillet of rattlesnake for supper, all washed down with the finest New Mexico tequila. Russ has been living this luxury life for the last sixty odd years, ever since his parent's weekend trip turned to disaster: it only took one false maneuver somewhere past Saturn to send their sh...
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Funny story:  Manchester United's Rooney To Be Subject To Schalke Winking Campaign

Manchester United's Rooney To Be Subject To Schalke Winking Campaign

United's England star strike, Wayne Rooney, will face some unusual tactics in the European Championship quarter final tonight. It has emerged that FC Scalke 04 players plan to wink at him throughout the match in an effort to put him off his game.
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Funny story:  Mel Gibson To Portray Nicolas Cage and Nicolas Cage To Portray Mel Gibson In The Film "The Totally Whacked Out Dipsticks"

Mel Gibson To Portray Nicolas Cage and Nicolas Cage To Portray Mel Gibson In The Film "The Totally Whacked Out Dipsticks"

LOS ANGELES - Noted Italian Director Vilandro Gorianzanni in association with Lions Face Films and TouchRock Pictures will direct Mel Gibson and Nicolas Cage in the motion picture The Totally Whacked Out Dipsticks. The film is loosely based on the...
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Funny story:  Fernando Torres To Leave Chelsea For Barcelona In Summer

Fernando Torres To Leave Chelsea For Barcelona In Summer

Fernando Torres, the Chelsea striker who scored his first goal for the club in the 3-0 win over West Ham at the weekend, has indicated that he may leave Chelsea for Barcelona in the summer. Torres, 27, endured 903 minutes of football before he fin...
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Funny story:  Angelina Jolie Angrily Denies She Cheated On Brad Pitt With George Clooney

Angelina Jolie Angrily Denies She Cheated On Brad Pitt With George Clooney

NEW ORLEANS - The entire Brad Pitt - Angelina Jolie family is in New Orleans while Pitt films the latest in the Indiana Jones series, Indiana Jones - The Search For The Alternate Life Style. The film stars Harrison Ford and co-stars Neil Patrick H...
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Funny story:  West Ham Boss Depressed After Chelsea Defeat

West Ham Boss Depressed After Chelsea Defeat

The 3-0 defeat at the hands of fellow Londoners Chelsea has seen West Ham boss Avram Grant virtually concede that his club is a dead cert to be relegated. Losing so heavily at this time of the season is always hard to take, a world weary Grant com...
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Funny story:  Dr Kenwood's Worst-Case Scenario Casebook # 2: Am I Going To Die?

Dr Kenwood's Worst-Case Scenario Casebook # 2: Am I Going To Die?

Hello again everyone. I have in front of me a letter from a concerned patient, worried sick that he might be 'terminally ill'. Now, as you know, death is not a trifling thing, and is certainly not something we should be making fun of, but it happens to us all in the end, and we shouldn't be afraid to die. That's what I tell my patients if I think they are going to snuff it, anyway. The l...
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Funny story:  Manchester United Boss Sir Alex Ferguson Wary Over Schalke 04 Semi-Final Threat

Manchester United Boss Sir Alex Ferguson Wary Over Schalke 04 Semi-Final Threat

Manchester United manager Sir Alex Ferguson has told reporters that he is wary over the threat posed by German side Schalke 04 ahead of the Champions League semi-final first leg clash tonight. Said the Scot: "Aye, it's going to be a tricky one.
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Funny story:  Dunfermline Mascot Condemned After Stunt

Dunfermline Mascot Condemned After Stunt

Scottish First Division club Dunfermline Athletic have been slammed after their mascot "Sammy The Tammy" took to the field dressed as a tank and appeared to aim at rival fans before the top of the table clash at East End Park last Saturday. Former...
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Funny story:  Cameron Told House Of Lords Is Full

Cameron Told House Of Lords Is Full

A cross party group of peers has told Prime Minister David Cameron that he can't create any more peers as the House of Lords is already full. The Coalition leader has created a record breaking number of peers in less than a year and the chamber is...
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Funny story:  My review of Amor Triumfo (which is Spanish for Love Triumphs)

My review of Amor Triumfo (which is Spanish for Love Triumphs)

Normally, I watch Castle on Monday nights. However, tonight was a rerun and nothing else was on TV so I found myself watch the Spanish channel Univision and began watching this telenovela, which is a Spanish soap opera. I am fluent in Spanish and have lived in Mexico (seriously), but I have a hard time understanding these shows because the actors talk so fast. Here is the synopsis and review...
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Funny story:  Idowu To Skip Royal Wedding

Idowu To Skip Royal Wedding

Triple Jump World Record holder Phillips Idowu is to skip the Royal Wedding on April 29th to raise funds. The Belgrave Harrier is planning to hop, step and jump along the route from Buckingham Palace to Westminster Abbey and then back to the Palac...
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Funny story:  Rachel "Bree" Oberlin, One of Charlie Sheen's 'Goddesses' Explains Why She Dumped His 'Winning' Butt

Rachel "Bree" Oberlin, One of Charlie Sheen's 'Goddesses' Explains Why She Dumped His 'Winning' Butt

FORT LAUDERDALE - Charlie Sheen's Traveling Dysfunctional Carnival Sideshow and Ego Booster Tour aka My Violent Winning Torpedo of Truth Vs. The Losing Trolls of Lies Tour rode into Fort Lauderdale, Florida minus one of "Carlito" Sheen's two goddesse...
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Funny story:  British Hair In A Bottle?  American Women Say, 'No Way!"

British Hair In A Bottle? American Women Say, 'No Way!"

With the intense media coverage of Kate Middleton's pending entry into the rarified world of fashion icon-istic-fabulosity, American women who are always the primary targets of such rot, are being told by media pundits that Miss Middleton is the po...
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Funny story:  Texas Legislature Votes for Product Placement in Texas Classrooms

Texas Legislature Votes for Product Placement in Texas Classrooms

Fort Worth: In order to help bring more money into the educational system in Texas, the legislature has voted on a bill that would allow product placement and ad wraps in classrooms. Product placement has become popular in movies and American te...
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Funny story:  eBooks Heat Up; Fire Brigades Stand by for Action

eBooks Heat Up; Fire Brigades Stand by for Action

Once upon a time, book censorship standards were strict, and authors had to watch their plots and their language. Not anymore. That's why the latest trend is the forthcoming publication of ebook "restored" versions of print works from the 50s and...
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Funny story:  City Gun For Champions League Berth - Nobody Notices

City Gun For Champions League Berth - Nobody Notices

Manchester City made a clear declaration of intent last night as they went walkabout in the darkest wilds of Blackburn, beating aside all manner of attacks from woolly backed, flat cap and muffler wearing ferret toting Blackburnianites. It was just a football match. Nobody really bothered to tune in to Sky Sports to watch it because it clashed with Corrie and Ade Edmondson messing about with...
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Funny story:  The Dalai Lama's Boot Camp called "Transience"

The Dalai Lama's Boot Camp called "Transience"

I am Theo Seemore, editor of "Oculus" a magazine devoted to enlightenment. Recently I traveled to Poona in India to meet with The Dalai Lama. I was interested in the clinic he had established there and which he runs with his monks. Called "Transience" it deals with an unusual type of invalid, one which we in the West do not consider an invalid at all. I met Tibet's great spiritual leader in hi...
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