Funny story:  Cheryl Cole and Cher Lloyd in naked mud wrestling showdown

Cheryl Cole and Cher Lloyd in naked mud wrestling showdown

X-Factor judge Cheryl Cole and wannabe Cheryl Cole and notorious bully in the Malvern area, Cher Lloyd are set to go head to head in a live mud wrestling extravaganza to find out just who is the hardest bitch on prime time Saturday evening television...
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Funny story:  'Hills' actress typecast...as herself

'Hills' actress typecast...as herself

LOS ANGELES, CA (SN) - Audrina Patridge roamed 'The Hills' and lived the life of high society for six seasons on one of MTV's most successful reality shows to date. Now, Patridge, 25, is having trouble finding work after a successful TV show. The r...
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Funny story:  Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart Fool Their Many Fans

Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart Fool Their Many Fans

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart went unrecognized at a recent gig last week as they came up with a great disguise. The 'Twilight' stars - who have long been rumoured to be a real life couple at many of the hotels and motels around the count...
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Funny story:  Rachel Maddow Denies Using Hazelnut Douche Bags To Lure Chicks

Rachel Maddow Denies Using Hazelnut Douche Bags To Lure Chicks

MSNBC superstar, Rachel Maddow, who affectionately calls Keith Olbermann, "Little Dick," seems content to allow reports that she uses hazelnut douche bags to lure young chicks into her lair remain uncontested. Supposedly, this rumor was first releas...
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Funny story:  "New Earth" Discovery Update: Could Be Future Of Man

"New Earth" Discovery Update: Could Be Future Of Man

Astronomers say they have for the first time ever, spotted a planet beyond our own in what is sometimes called the 'Goldilocks' zone for life: Not too hot, not too cold. but juuuust right. "That sounds a little like Dr. Seuss but with our breakthr...
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Funny story:  Astrology shocker as 7,000-ton gasoline tanker YM Uranus pranged

Astrology shocker as 7,000-ton gasoline tanker YM Uranus pranged

Brest, Finisterre - (Retrograde Stuff): A massive 179,000-ton Panamanian tanker, the Hanjin Rizhao, has been in collision with the Turkish-registered YM Uranus, carrier of 7,000 tons of gasoline solvent called heavy pygas. The accident, off Finis...
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Funny story:  Justin Bieber To Star On MTV's Revived 'Punk'd' With Guests From Miley Cyrus To Ashley Greene

Justin Bieber To Star On MTV's Revived 'Punk'd' With Guests From Miley Cyrus To Ashley Greene

MTV is revamping "Punk'd," and this time around, Justin Bieber will be hosting, instead of Ashton Kutcher. Kutcher, however, will continue as an executive producer. In an interview with the hottest new tabloid 'The Daily Blabbermouth', Bieber s...
View 'Justin Bieber To Star On MTV's Revived 'Punk'd' With Guests From Miley Cyrus To Ashley Greene'
Funny story:  Born to Spoof Chapter 7: The Expended.

Born to Spoof Chapter 7: The Expended.

There was suddenly a hive of activity in the bar. Doormen appeared from no-where and everywhere, each one rapidly speaking into radios and rushing towards the door. In the dark gloom, many of them tripped up and before long there was a big pile of blacksuited monkey men in the middle of the floor. But still they appeared, and still they headed towards the front door. From the distance, a...
View 'Born to Spoof Chapter 7: The Expended.'
Funny story:  Stuxnet sucks net lifeblood on 10/10/10

Stuxnet sucks net lifeblood on 10/10/10

Cyberspace - (Malware): A numerologically absurd proposition will test theories this weekend that the internet is about to collapse under the weight of the numbers game. The Stuxnet virus's programmed life span is due to detonate millions of lapto...
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Funny story:  Ex-Chevron director General Jones dumps Obama

Ex-Chevron director General Jones dumps Obama

Washington AC/DC - (Crude Stuff): The lifeblood drained from the collective testicles of the Obama entourage today as former NATO supreme commander Gen James Jones walked away from his National Security Adviser post. Scrotally depleted and shrive...
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Funny story:  Twins Target JCPenney for Takeover

Twins Target JCPenney for Takeover

In the business world, rumors of hostile takeovers are as common as your ugly aunt's underwear and, if you know anything about time management, most of them hardly deserve a moment of your attention. Unfortunately, a certain percentage of rumors turn...
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Funny story:  Norton Folgate's Theory On Trees

Norton Folgate's Theory On Trees

Professor Norton Folgate has a theory about trees. And, as usual, he was only too willing to share his theory with us. As it is too much like hard work to edit what the Prof witters on about, we are, once again, printing his latest theory in full. "Trees are everywhere. Most people think they are wonderful things. In fact there are some who go around hugging them. Can you believe th...
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Funny story:  We're Out of Debt!!!

We're Out of Debt!!!

The United Kingdom is OFFICIALLY OUT OF DEBTwe can exclusively reveal, following a statement by Mr. George Osbourne earlier today. The UK has managed to clear all of it's National Debts in one go. But it's at a cost. Earlier this year, New...
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Funny story:  This takes the biscuit

This takes the biscuit

It is reported that following a two year campaign to clear her name. a Northern Irish school dinner lady has been successful. The lady, who cannot be named, was suspected of grooming a pupil after she gave him a biscuit. A spokesperson for the...
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Funny story:  Dora The Explorer Voice Breaks

Dora The Explorer Voice Breaks

Children's Hispanic TV character, Dora the Explorer, has said in a statement released today, that she will not pay wages claimed by her voice artist Caitlin Sanchez, because the latter's voice has broken. Sanchez, 14, claims that she is owed more...
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Funny story:  Chinese UFO Mystery Solved as Liu Xiaobo Accepts Peace Prize

Chinese UFO Mystery Solved as Liu Xiaobo Accepts Peace Prize

Recent sightings of UFOs in China have had Chinese government officials quite puzzled as an almost regular procession of gigantic glowing spacecraft have been hovering dangerously close to the Baotou and Xiaoshan Airports. At last count, there have...
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Funny story:  Justin Beiber surprise nominee for Nobel Peace Prize Award

Justin Beiber surprise nominee for Nobel Peace Prize Award

He's had bottles thrown at him. He's sang a load of shit songs. And he's practically murdered the pop scene today. But toddler/teenager Justin "B-Man" Beiber has been nominated to win the Nobel Peace Prize. The lad, who's just about to sit his...
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Funny story:  Luddite invents machine to destroy technology quicker.

Luddite invents machine to destroy technology quicker.

A local Luddite movement in Englandshire is up in non-mechanical arms this week, as one of their young brethrens attempt to do a good turn has taken a turn for the unpleasant, with name calling and even some physical gesticulating in the general dire...
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Funny story:  British Gas Makes Energy from Sewage

British Gas Makes Energy from Sewage

British Gas has teamed up with local water authorities to utilise sewage farms to make gas. Sewage is stirred and aerated and methane gas is made by the action of bacteria. The amount of solid waste produced by each person each year can supply eno...
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Funny story:  Shadow Cabinet anouncement was "clerical error"

Shadow Cabinet anouncement was "clerical error"

A Labour Party spokesman today blamed the Shadow Cabinet announcement on a clerical error. The leader's secretary was taking dictation from Mr Miliband when he allegedly shouted "Balls!" in exasperation at forgetting the name of the MP he had chos...
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Funny story:  Blog gets read

Blog gets read

The Twitterati whipped themselves up into a frenzy this afternoon after a blog got read. "I got a hit!" Tweeted the blogger, excitedly. "And it wasn't from my family, Twitter followers nor anyone from my local group therapy session either!" ... ..
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Funny story:  Virus checkers "A bigger problem than viruses"

Virus checkers "A bigger problem than viruses"

McNorton, the largest supplier of virus checkers in the world have come out and admitted that their products cause more disruption than the very viruses that they protect against. "There are so many viruses out in the wild now," said Casper Skye,...
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Funny story:  Grandchester Utd profit hurts burger vans

Grandchester Utd profit hurts burger vans

Granchester United, hit by one-off finance charges and reduced revenues from the sale of teacups, has reported an annual pre-tax loss of £4.96p. The loss for the 12 months to 30 June compares with a profit of £18.00 for the year before, when reven...
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Funny story:  Anna Chapman stowaway on Soyuz flight to International Space Station!

Anna Chapman stowaway on Soyuz flight to International Space Station!

Kazakhstan - (Pie-in-the-Sky): The red haired bombshell arrived at the Baikonur cosmodrome under a blanket of secrecy before being smuggled aboard a Soyuz craft bound for outer space. Camouflaged as a piece of baggage belonging to cosmonauts Alexa...
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Funny story:  Did Former Pirate from Manchester Win $175M Lottery? Mum's The Word Says His Barrister!

Did Former Pirate from Manchester Win $175M Lottery? Mum's The Word Says His Barrister!

Despite universal silence on the matter, rumours are circulating that a former Pirate, butcher, and shite cook has scored the nation's biggest lotto payoff since Wayne Rooney & David Beckham made off with everything but the crown jewels in their...
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Funny story:  Obama Drops an SBD in the Rose Garden

Obama Drops an SBD in the Rose Garden

Washington, DC - In a speech from the White House rose garden President Obama talking about curbs on greenhouse-gas emissions, let loose a 'silent but deadly,' "that, had it been indoors, would have left everybody gasping for breath," according to an...
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Funny story:  European intelligence claims that US President, Campaigner in Chief Obama's raised terror alerts, are 'nonsensical'!

European intelligence claims that US President, Campaigner in Chief Obama's raised terror alerts, are 'nonsensical'!

MI5 and MI6, Cheltenham GCHQ: Over the past few days the Western Security Apparatus has been on very high alert after the US secret intelligence agencies controlled by the Pentagon issued warnings that al-Qaida was plotting to attack targets in the...
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Funny story:  NHS buys New Dyson Birthing Machine

NHS buys New Dyson Birthing Machine

The NHS has purchased 217 Dyson Birthing Machines for maternity units throughout England. The birthing machine is described as a revolution for mothers experiencing a difficult birth. It incorporates Dyson's patented Root Cyclone technology and, w...
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Funny story:  "Cher Lloyd Was A Rat-Faced Pikey Bully At School" Claims Schoolmate

"Cher Lloyd Was A Rat-Faced Pikey Bully At School" Claims Schoolmate

Fragile X-Factor wannabe from Malvern, Cher Lloyd was described by an ex schoolfriend as being a rat-faced pikey bully girl last night. Glenda Sloot, 17, also from Malvern described how the vulnerable looking singer was a nightmare at school. "...
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Funny story:  Unemployment at all time low...

Unemployment at all time low...

...in Afghanistan. Heavy US reliance on private security in Afghanistan has helped to line the pockets of the Taliban, a US Senate report says. Some 26,000 private security personnel, mostly Afghans, operate in Afghanistan paid for from the U.
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Funny story:  Isle of Wight Man Allows Facial Hair To Grow

Isle of Wight Man Allows Facial Hair To Grow

A Newport man has surprised friends and colleagues by allowing his facial hair to grow for several weeks. Simon Crimp, who works for a local sanitary supplies company, woke up one morning too late to have a shave before he left for the office.
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Funny story:  Scrabble.

Scrabble.

MAIEUTICS is the kind of word that you shouldn't use in Scrabble. Everyone will think you're an arse, and it will only get you into trouble Even if you genuinely know it or it was just a random guess They will all talk at you in stentorian tones of your sesquipedalian excess Don't use words like "epiphenomenal," "diegetic" or "proprioceptive." too It's just that kind of malarkey that will...
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Funny story:  Benefit cut benefits

Benefit cut benefits

Following the announcement by British Prime Minister that child benefit payments will be cut researchers have unearthed some of the otherwise unseen benefits that are to come. Whilst some of the public are left seething by the PM's news others are mo...
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Funny story:  So Women Do Merely Glow

So Women Do Merely Glow

The old saying that 'horses sweat, men perspire and women glow' is true, according to a Japanese study. "It appears that women are at a disadvantage when they need to sweat during exercise," said research co-ordnator Yoshimitsu Inoue, in the journ...
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Funny story:  Italy Plans 'Ban The Burkha' Vote

Italy Plans 'Ban The Burkha' Vote

Italy's right-wing Northern League party has put forward a bill calling for the burkha to be banned in public. The bill comes just weeks after France made the controversial veil illegal on security grounds. If it is passed, observers reckon the pr...
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Funny story:  David Cameron Set To Approve Aircraft Carriers Order - Thanks To Airfix!

David Cameron Set To Approve Aircraft Carriers Order - Thanks To Airfix!

Prime Minister David Cameron is poised to approve a £5 billion order for two new aircraft carriers for the Royal Navy - thanks to a boyhood hobby. The decision follows a meeting of the national security council he chaired yesterday. And it comes a...
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Funny story:  Ode to West Nile Virus

Ode to West Nile Virus

An Ode to a Certain Malevolent Maladie on the Occasion of a Major Epidemic that has Acquired a Pathogenicity that Imperils Mankind Across the Globe and May Destroy Civilization as It Is Known to Us Presented in Its Entirety by the Poet Laureate on the Mundane, the Preposterous, and the Absurd: Sir Percival Blink, Esq. to His Most Excellent, Gracious Majesty, Humbert II, as He Succumbs to Ye Ol...
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Funny story:  Albania issues Norman Wisdom commemorative bath plug

Albania issues Norman Wisdom commemorative bath plug

The Albanian government has announced that a commemorative bath plug is to be issued honouring the memory of Norman Wisdom who died earlier this week. In a press interview, Albania's foreign minister said "The death of Mr Pitkin was a terrible blo...
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Funny story:  Schoolgirl Donates Tooth Fairy Money To Help Economy

Schoolgirl Donates Tooth Fairy Money To Help Economy

A big hearted six year old girl has donated her £1.00 tooth fairy money to David Cameron in a bid to revive Britain's ailing economy. Pint sized Niamh Lewis, from Irlam, nr Manchester was horrified to learn of public sector cuts, an increase in th...
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Funny story:  500 Years Later, 53rd Card  Makes Debut in Decks

500 Years Later, 53rd Card Makes Debut in Decks

The introduction of a new playing card to standard decks is creating a furor among card players, casino owners, psychics, gypsies, 3-car monty dealers and kids with bicycles. Introduced last week without fan fare, the new card, marked with the let...
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Funny story:  Brown invades Comm Games

Brown invades Comm Games

Delhi, India. The nineteenth Commonwealth Games have been further dragged down as a sporting contest when former UK Prime Minister Gordon Brown appeared controversially in a number of contests here in Delhi. The first event Brown was spotted in wa...
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Funny story:  Doggers get police protection

Doggers get police protection

Police officers around the UK have been given guidelines to help them protect people who engage in dogging from hate crimes. Chief Superintendent Phil McCavity, from Burgess Hill police station said, "Having sex in public places is only a crime w...
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Funny story:  "Congratulations." Thus spake The Spoof. "You've Won!" Fire! Atwitter! Heart apace with the fleetest steed's, for I am about to be draped in the fineries of that that have heretofore been not mine to possess.

"Congratulations." Thus spake The Spoof. "You've Won!" Fire! Atwitter! Heart apace with the fleetest steed's, for I am about to be draped in the fineries of that that have heretofore been not mine to possess.

"Congratulations." Thus spake The Spoof. "You've Won!" Fire! Atwitter! Heart apace with the fleetest steed's, for I am about to be draped in the fineries of that that have heretofore been not mine to possess. It is The Spoof, whose heartfelt announcement broke the silence that cast itself throughout my office; a speaker harkens to me when no task from it was asked. I search: On no horizo...
View '"Congratulations." Thus spake The Spoof. "You've Won!" Fire! Atwitter! Heart apace with the fleetest steed's, for I am about to be draped in the fineries of that that have heretofore been not mine to possess.'
Funny story:  Defence cuts to reduce Royal Navy to smallest size

Defence cuts to reduce Royal Navy to smallest size

In a desperate bid to save two new aircraft carriers which are under construction, Royal Navy chiefs have agreed with government demands to reduce the number of warships in the fleet by almost 75%. This move will cut the Navy down to a size last seen...
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Funny story:  Following God on Twitter Replaces Going To Church For Many

Following God on Twitter Replaces Going To Church For Many

For Mildred Finklesplat, 92, of Keyport, NJ, getting to the 9:30AM Sunday sermon at the First Baptist Church on Main Street meant getting up at 6:00AM, just to get ready. "I take 22 pills every morning," said Finklesplat, whose husband met his Cre...
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Funny story:  Animal Rights Group To Girl Who Threw Puppies In River: Let US Kill Them Next Time!

Animal Rights Group To Girl Who Threw Puppies In River: Let US Kill Them Next Time!

The girl who lit up Youtube's comment feature by being shown throwing puppies into a raging river was commended for "nice form" by an animal rights group of People who champion the rights of animals. In the 43-second clip, a young woman or girl w...
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Funny story:  Cabinet Minister causes storm in a condom

Cabinet Minister causes storm in a condom

A senior government figure has provoked a storm of indignation from the population of Essex. His remarks were made at a luncheon hosted by a local Family Planning Association. Culture Secretary Jeremy Blunt suggested the bleeding obvious, when he...
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Funny story:  Senior Tory denies that he's a Mormon

Senior Tory denies that he's a Mormon

Foreign Secretary William Hague has today issued a statement refuting rumours that he is a secret Mormon Elder' There is no truth whatsoever in these scurrilous rumours' he told reporters. 'I admit that over the last few months I have regularly share...
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Funny story:  Nude Porno Pics Of David Cameron And Boris Johnson Giving Katie Price One Up The Arse Are Fakes

Nude Porno Pics Of David Cameron And Boris Johnson Giving Katie Price One Up The Arse Are Fakes

Following an exhaustive investigation, Skoob News can finally reveal that the photographs displayed on the interweb of Prime Minister David Cameron, and London Mayor, Boris Johnson, giving Katie Price one up the arse are photoshopped fakes. Acting...
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Funny story:  UK house market in freefall

UK house market in freefall

Latest figures from the second Bank of England, Northern Rock, have revealed that UK house prices are in freefall. In September, six grand was wiped off the value of an average house, more if it was a posh house and less if it was a caravan or a shed...
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