Spoof news stories from October 2010
There were 1,650 spoof news stories published in October 2010. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.
Mr. Spock Says Star Trek Cast 'Always Stoned'
Hollywood, CA-- Leonard Nimoy, better known as Mr. Spock, confessed today the entire Star Trek cast "was stoned out of their minds" during filming. Mr. Nimoy claimed the legendary show was nicknamed 'Bong Trek', because everyone was constantly smoki...
Cheryl Cole and Cher Lloyd in naked mud wrestling showdown
X-Factor judge Cheryl Cole and wannabe Cheryl Cole and notorious bully in the Malvern area, Cher Lloyd are set to go head to head in a live mud wrestling extravaganza to find out just who is the hardest bitch on prime time Saturday evening television...
Chile Miner Site to be turned into Theme Park
The President of Chile Uno Gomez has announced the mining disaster site will be preserved as a theme park for tourists to discover 'the spirit of Chile'
Once the miners have been rescued, Sidney World Entertainment Co. (Chile) will move in and com...
"Cher Lloyd Was A Rat-Faced Pikey Bully At School" Claims Schoolmate
Fragile X-Factor wannabe from Malvern, Cher Lloyd was described by an ex schoolfriend as being a rat-faced pikey bully girl last night.
Glenda Sloot, 17, also from Malvern described how the vulnerable looking singer was a nightmare at school.
"...
X-Factor Katie Waissel Nude Sex Video Inevitable Says Buffty Ginslinger
From Storm Brewing In Teacup Inc - in association with Skoob Entertainment News (SEN)
News that there exists a 'naughty' DVD of X-Factor contestant and Madonna wannabe Katie Waissel may have had the nation choking on its porridge this morning as t...
Katy Perry gets cold feet
Singer Katy Perry - soon to be wed to long haired television personality Russell Brand has reportedly told how she has started to get cold feet. VERY cold feet.
An inside source says that now the wedding is getting closer, Katy has been putting m...
Mary Byrne And Cher Lloyd Deny Nude X-Factor Lesbian Romp With Katie Waissel
Hot on the heels of rumours that X-Factor wannabe, Katie Waissel has been getting down n dirty with fellow contestant Matt Cardle - rumours Matt strenuously denied - insiders say that Cher Lloyd and Mary Byrne have also denied having a nude XXX Rated...
A Welshman's Guide to Welsh Slang
In Wales, you'll need about 15 words to get by. Many are slang. Here's just a few you can use to successfully blend in. Why not buy a Welsh flag and a T-shirt with Cymru imprinted on it?
1) Poppity ping: use this one at McDonalds if your sandwich ever gets cold. Slang for microwave
"Can I put the sandwich in the poppity ping?"
2) Boyo: Use this one if you want to express feelings of imme...
Miley Cyrus Is A Little Bit Pregnant?!
After being accused of being pregnant half a dozen times in the past, it may finally be true, as Miley Cyrus apparently told reporters at her house this morning.
Since this reporter has been banned by the Cyrus family after our mistaken 'cannibal...
Fresh Beats' Shayna Rose Now Only Young Star Never to be Arrested, Rehabbed, or Photographed Without Panties
26-year-old actress Shayna Rose, widely acclaimed for such memorable TV roles as 'Girl #2', 'Onlooker #5' and 'The Younger Wench' before becomming Marina on Nick, Jr.'s pandering "The Fresh Beat Band", has been named the only female actress under 30...
Michael McIntyre Isn't Chinese - And That's Official
Stand up comic Michael McIntyre last night confirmed on the Paul O'Grady Show that he is not actually half Chinese or Japanese.
Contrary to rumours circulated by stupid, dumb assed step daughters who believe everything they read on the internet.
Gay Man Annoys Neighbour By Putting His Penis in Wife's Ear
A gay man has been sending his neighbour around the bend with his hilarious pranks.
Larry Sabu, 20, likes nothing better than sliding into bed next to his neighbour's wife and slotting his flaccid penis into her ear, then taking a picture of it, p...
Karl Pilkington To Do 'An Idiot Abroad 2' ? - Internet Campaign Begins
Ricky Gervais wants Karl Pilkington to make another series of 'An Idiot Abroad' after the runaway success of Pilkington's first series.
In that series, Pilkington - a grumpy Mancunian who hates travelling - visted the seven wonders of the world, a...
Cheryl Cole Reveals Part Of New Tattoo - It's On Her Arse
Cheryl Cole, former wife of that Chelsea love rat, X-Factor judge, part time Girls Aloud vocalist, (providing Nadine Coyle isn't included) solo artiste and celebrity extraordinaire, revealed at least a part of her new tattoo as she unveiled a waxwork...
Robert Pattinson Thinks Taylor Lautner May Be Gay
In a stunner this morning during an interview with Robert Pattinson about the upcoming Twilight movie, Robert Pattinson let slip that he thinks that fellow actor, Taylor Lautner may be gay.
After a long question and answer session about the movies...
Noisy Neighbours Silenced By Lech Poznan Fans
City Of Manchester Stadium (home of Wayne Rooney Ltd) Thursday.
A somewhat embarrassing experience here for City fans last night. The normally noisy neighbours were put to shame by visiting fans of Polish Champions, Lech Poznan.
No rousing rend...
Taylor Swift Writes About Her Life, Loves, Lautner & Lack Of Boobs!
Singer Taylor Swift told reporters yesterday in Nashville, where she is recording her latest album, that all the songs she writes are about her own life, loves and lack of boobs.
"In fact, that's the name of my new album, "Life, Love, Lautner &...
Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart's Steamy Vampire Sex Scene In Twilight: Breaking Dawn
Insiders who have seen parts of the scripts for "Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn" have hinted that there will be a very steamy sex scene between the two leading stars, Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart.
"Parts of the script were left on someone's...
X-Factor's Katie Waissel's Dark Secret Past Revealed
The dark tragedy of Katie Waissel's past is about to be revealed and its a real shocker. Friends are so worried about what the revelations will do to Katie, that they have even offered journalists money to withhold their information. But here, at S...
Katie Waissel-Cher Lloyd Girl On Girl Action DVD Faked By Buffty Ginslinger
In a Skoob Entertainment News exclusive, we can reveal here for the first time, that the hot lesbian sex action DVD which was on sale in certain Soho outlets from this morning, purporting to feature Katie Waissel and Cher Lloyd off the X-Factor, is a...
Kate Humble Nude - New Fashion And Make-Up Lines
As if the long-running story concerning fans demanding their idols wear fewer or more clothes was not complex enough, another group has entered the fray.
'Humbly For Kate' is a group of fans who eagerly tune in to watch Kate Humble present Autumnw...
Lindsay Lohan Converts to Islam to Beat Alcohol and Cocaine Addictions
People think that fame and fortune are the road to eternal happiness; this is the American Dream fostered by American Idol. Yesterday Michael Douglas visited his sister Lindsay Lohan at the Betty Ford Center on family day. At a press conference after...
Taylor Momsen In Shock NY Gig Titty Flash Incident
Seventeen year old wild child and Gossip Girl starlet Taylor Momsen shocked even hardened New Yorkers recently by baring her breasts part way through a gig with her band The Pretty Reckless.
Having already shocked the audience when she appeared on...
X-Factor Gamu can stay, hoody chavs sent to Zimbabwe in her place.
The Home Secretary has been urged to take a personal interest in the case of X Factor reject Gamu Nhengu, who faces deportation to Zimbabwe.
Scotland's Culture Minister Fiona Hyslop has said the teenager had the potential to be a 'great asset' to...
Benefits funded my boob job
As many families face losing benefits, or at the very least seeing them reduced, one unemployed single mother has decided to treat herself.
Schappelle Rooty-Fucknuckle, 34, has never worked, has five children by four different fathers and claims b...
Russell Brand and Katy Perry Divorce
Mere moments after saying, "I do!", Russell Brand and Katy Perry and Russell Brand have jointly announced their divorce.
"Russell Brand and Katy Perry are overjoyed to confirm that their marriage was terminated via divorce on Saturday, October 23.
Taylor Swift Says "Two Headlights" About Jakob Dylan
Taylor Swift says that her song, "Two Headlights" is as real as all her other songs and has nothing to do with her lack of boobs but is a tribute to Jakob and Bob Dylan whom she admires.
"I've loved Jakob Dylan's singing for a long time. He has th...
Wayne Rooney Signs New Contract
In one of the biggest about-turns in recent footballing memory, Manchester United and England striker Wayne Rooney has today signed a new three-year contract agreement.
Rooney, 24, went with his wife Coleen to his local branch of Currys and purcha...
Chinese UFO Mystery Solved as Liu Xiaobo Accepts Peace Prize
Recent sightings of UFOs in China have had Chinese government officials quite puzzled as an almost regular procession of gigantic glowing spacecraft have been hovering dangerously close to the Baotou and Xiaoshan Airports. At last count, there have...
Taylor Momsen Did Not Shoot XXX Lesbian Carpet Munching Scene With X-Factor's Katie Waissel
Hollywood - Pretty Reckless singer Taylor Momsen unleashed yet another foul mouthed tirade at reporters and paparazzi here today when she was asked to confirm or deny the existence of an XXX rated DVD featuring her and Katie Waissel off the X-Factor...
Trapped Chilean miners to be greeted by Gamu Nhengu
X-Factor reject Gamu Nhengu is travelling to the San Jose mine in Chile in time to greet the 33 trapped miners as they are pulled to safety.
Gamu will sing the Chilean National Anthem to each miner as they see daylight for the first time in over 6...
Chicharito Double Strike Stuns Stoke City
Stoke City's Britannia Stadium certainly lived up to its billing as the Premier League's noisiest arena as the Manchester United roadshow swept into town.
A pulsating encounter saw United take the lead courtesy of a spectacular back-header by Unit...
Invisible UFO Spotted Over Manhattan
New York, NY-- An invisible UFO was seen by millions of people in New York City yesterday. The invisible craft hovered over Manhattan for several hours before disappearing. Curious onlookers tied up traffic in the Big Apple, as thousands of people...
Kate Gosselin Getting Vajazzled to Jazz Up Kate Plus Eight
Not one to let a few cancellation rumors get her down, Kate Gosselin has decided that in order to keep herself and her kids on top of the reality show game, she is going to have to pull out all the stops. She has just announced that in an upcoming ep...
Taylor Swift Named Itty Bitty Titty Czar By Barack Obama To Represent Flat Chested and Breastless Women
Country Music singing sensation Taylor Swift may have to put her entertainment career on hold for the next two years. She has been appointed the latest "Czar" by President Barack Obama. Her new, cabinet level, non-constitutional post will make the...
Woman dies in freak accident while trying to defrost her car
A Rochdale woman died this morning while trying to defrost her car. In a bizarre sequence of events, Brenda Protheroe successfully removed herself from the human gene pool.
Ms Protheroe walked out of her house to find her 15 year old Fiat Panda co...
Chicharito Spotted With Pixie Lott At The Sheriff of Nottingham Restaurant In Manchester's Piccadilly Gardens
MANCHESTER - Javier Hernandez Balcazar, alias Chicharito, was reportedly seen at the swank Sheriff of Nottingham Restaurant in Piccadilly Gardens in the company of the gorgeously sexy singer, dancer, actress Pixie Lott.
An unnamed source said that...
Time traveller in Chaplin's film reveals time travel conspiracy
It has come to light that the time traveller spotted in the Charlie Chaplin film of 1928 is the genuine article, and on top of this, a lot of the rebuttals against this being the genuine article are from Time Travellers themselves. A rogue time trave...
World's most disabled person found
Bob lives in Milton Keynes and is cared for by his mother, Ethel. Bob suffered terrible birth defects during his mother's somewhat difficult pregnancy. He is now 35 years old.
Bob was born with no arms, no legs, no mouth, no ears and only one eye,...
Nigella Lawson Burns Left Nipple In Chicken Noodle Soup Mishap
Unconfirmed reports are coming in to the Skoob Entertainment News office, that Nigella Lawson, the TV chef with the big bazookas has been involved in an unfortunate kitchen mishap when her left nipple became scalded as she bent over a pan of hot chi...
Stuxnet sinks Royal Navy's HMS Astute flagship sub
Isle of Skye - (Pie-in-the-Sky Mess): Fears that the Stuxnet virus may have sunk the latest and most sophisticated British nuclear submarine have shaken the MoD.
The billion pound attack stealth vessel was last seen listing badly off Scottish terr...
School dinner lady in child sex grooming scandal
A dinner lady at a primary school in County Durham has not worked for two years, after being warned that her actions could be construed as grooming a child for the purposes of having sex.
Mrs Dot Lavatory, 97, was witnessed by a supervisor offerin...
Tory fatcat 'is secret £113 million lotto winner'
London - (Big Money Balls Mess): A prominent government front bencher has been outed as the secret winner of last week's £113 million lottery draw.
The anonymous MP - previously an all-party House of Commons adviser on the lottery - is said to be...
Unions threaten French-style riots over public sector job cuts
A furious union backlash is expected, in response to the government's announcement that 490,000 public sector jobs will be cut. Union leaders have joined forces in condemning the decision and have compared the cuts to those recently made in France.
Wayne Rooney is going nowhere, says Colleen
Media speculation has been mounting over the departure of Wayne Rooney from Manchester United after a supposed bust-up between him and Alex Ferguson. However, according to his wife, Colleen Rooney, Rooney will be staying in Manchester.
There has b...
Taylor Lautner Gets Out Restraining Order To Keep Adam Lambert Away!
After having Adam Lambert pop up at several locations where he usually hangs out, Taylor Lautner has had his attorney go before a judge who has ordered a restraining order to keep Lambert from following Lautner everywhere.
"I hated to do it", Laut...
Ashton Kutcher & Demi Moore Headed For Divorce Court
After admitting to seeing other women, Ashton Kutcher says that his marriage to Demi Moore is practically over. They only need to file the divorce papers.
The May-December marriage has lasted longer than most predicted but there has been a constan...
Kim Kardashian's Nude Outsells Farah's Iconic 1976 Poster
Counted in terms of subscription downloads added to the number of magazine units sold, Kim Kardashian's recent nude poster is about to overtake perhaps the most famous bathing suit poster ever sold.
Farah Fawcett's famous one-piece beach poster,...
Nude Porno Pics Of David Cameron And Boris Johnson Giving Katie Price One Up The Arse Are Fakes
Following an exhaustive investigation, Skoob News can finally reveal that the photographs displayed on the interweb of Prime Minister David Cameron, and London Mayor, Boris Johnson, giving Katie Price one up the arse are photoshopped fakes.
Acting...
Mel Gibson reportedly mulling aid to Joran Van Der Sloot
A waiter at an upscale Malibu bistro reports that Mel Gibson is considering extending an offer of assistance to suspected killer Joran van Der Sloot.
"As I was serving Mr. Gibson and his publicist, I overheard them discussing damage control strat...
Camilla mistaken for Diana in Commonwealth Games gaffe
As Prince Charles and his drop-dead gorgeous wife, Camilla, arrived at the Commonwealth Games in Delhi yesterday, the President of the Games made an embarrassing mistake.
Whilst greeting the royal couple, Mr Mahatma Koat shook hands with the old m...
More X-Factor Controversy As Chloe Mafia Rumoured To Take Wild Card Slot Over Gamu
Controversy continues to dog Simon Cowell's X-Factor show as rumours surfaced today that a wild card slot will be awarded to alleged Wakefield prostitute Chloe Mafia, once again leaving the people's choice, Gamu Nhengu out in the cold.
A friend of...
Heidi Montag and Oksana Grigorieva To Pose Nude In a Girl-On-Girl Photo Layout In PlayGuy
CHICAGO - Mel Gibson's ex-former girlfriend and ex-future wife Oksana Grigorieva says that she is not going to wait around for Mel from hell to cough up money which is owed to her and their baby.
The Russian born pianist has consulted with the edi...
Illuminati rapture as 'missing' crystal skull found in Sir David Attenborough's garden!
London - (Artefux): Since the dawn of time the billion year-old amethyst skull has nestled under the foundations of the TV pundit's back side - er...yard!
This weekend the London Abasement Company's builders were gobsmacked when a mystery object u...
Cheryl Cole Admits Dying Hair Red - Denies Anal Bleaching
Skoob Entertainment News supremo, Buffty Ginslinger, today revealed that sources had revealed that X-factor judge and mentor Cheryl Cole had admitted having her hair dyed red but strenuously denied having her anus bleached or vajazzled in line with a...
H&R Block Sues HSBC: We Can't Overcharge Our Clients For RALs Without Their Help.
In an unprecedented move, HSBC Bank USA has decided to back out of providing funding for Refund Anticipation Loans (RAL) for the upcoming season, leaving perennial f---k-ups H&R Block with their proverbial d--ks in their hands. But my $26.50 a s...
Chicharito's Head "Back to Front"
Manchester United striker Javier Hernandez has revealed the secret of his baffling goal against Stoke, which was apparently scored with the back of his head.
It turns out the Mexican international, known as Chicharito - which translates as "the li...
Rooney cancels birthday bash
Somewhat surprisingly, Wayne Rooney has cancelled his much publicised 90 grand birthday bash at the last minute.
A close friend of Rooney said, "After the week's events, it turned out that the only people who still wanted to come were the Men In B...
Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart Fool Their Many Fans
Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart went unrecognized at a recent gig last week as they came up with a great disguise.
The 'Twilight' stars - who have long been rumoured to be a real life couple at many of the hotels and motels around the count...
Katie Waissel Angrily Denies X-Factor Fix Corruption Scandal Rumours
Skoob Entertainment News can exclusively reveal that much reviled X-Factor wannabe Katie Waissel will survive this weekend's X-Factor, because word from a little bird has it that the whole show is fixed.
SEN supremo Buffty Ginslinger has been busi...
The Spoof Fans Rate ThinkPoint Virus 4.7 out of 5 Stars
TheSpoof fans turned their attention briefly away from Lady Gaga and Adam Lambert to become immersed in the most hilarious new computer virus ever.
"ThinkPoint is an absolutely five-star hilarious computer virus!", said one user still rolling on t...
Trouble! Kevin Jonas & Wife Overheard Quarreling! He Walks Out!
There's trouble in paradise for Kevin and Danielle Jonas according to some of the biggest tabloids, although Kevin's brothers refuse to comment in any way.
According to a recent article in "Under The Sun Magazine", the two have been sleeping in s...
Rooney donates brain to medical science
Wayne Rooney has astounded his friends, family, Sir Alex Ferguson and the scientific community. In a completely selfless act, Rooney has donated his brain for medical research.
Rooney said "They gave me some forms to put me mark on, saying they co...
Taylor Lautner's Family Jewells Grabbed By Unknown Teenage Girl
Star of the Twilight movies, Taylor Lautner had several witnesses with him that agree that an unknown teenage girl had grabbed him by the goodies and squeezed them before coming up out of the water in a hotel pool Tuesday afternoon.
After several...
Rochdale property prices boom after release of new job figures
Newly released government job figures have led to a huge rise in people seeking to live in Rochdale. Houses are being purchased quicker than the local council can demolish them, to make way for new low cost housing.
The government figures driving...
Joran van der Sloot Claims He Should be Rescued Too
Upon getting word while incarnated in a Peruvian prison that one-by-one, the 33 Chilean miners who have been trapped underground since August 5 are now being brought out of the mine, alleged murderer Joran van der Sloot issued a statement through his...
Brand-Perry Marriage on Rocks Already After Camel Sex
Russell Brand and Katy Perry's marriage is already on the rocks, according to showbiz gossip websites, after Brand was caught having sex with one of the camels used in the ceremony.
The news came just hours after the pair released a statement toge...
Erin Andrews Claims She Never Received Nude Pix of Brett Farve and Threatens to Sue Her Internet Provider!
Erin Andrews, ESPN's Keyhole Kutie, reacted today when she found out that apparently she was the only female sideline analyst that hadn't received pictures of Brett Farve's Privates on her Cell Phone!
"I think it's outrageous," she said vehemently...
Kristen Stewart Admits She Is Also Attracted To Justin Bieber
Move over Miley Cyrus, Kristen Stewart in a new interview in this week's "The Daily Doozer", candidly admits that she has also been interested in young singing sensation, Justin Bieber.
"I don't think Miley and I are the only ones", she told the T...
Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart And Taylor Lautner To Host Hollywood Halloween Sex Party?
According to Skoob Entertainment News Hollywood correspondent, Brick McMuffin, the hottest ticket in town this week is for a themed Halloween party at a rented mansion in a secret location, high in the Hollywood Hills.
Hosted by Twilight triumvira...
Aircraft carrier fiasco takes a turn for the worse
Today, the government announced that construction of the Royal Navy's two new aircraft carriers is to go ahead. However, for the first two years of their service, they will have no aircraft, due to dire cuts in the defence budget and the axing of the...
Whitney Houston, Bobby Brown Release New Holiday CD
Back together and reportedly clean and sober again, Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown are set to release a new Christmas CD that chronicles the trials and tribulations of their former troubled lives set to the sounds of Christmas.
"It was a painful...
Austrian lad mag Wiener planning naked ballerina follow-up vid
Vienna - (YouBoob! News): Her naked glamor shots from a recent performance of The Nutcracker are already an internet sensation.
And now Vienna State Opera prima ballerina Karina Sarkissova's nude centerfold shots from The Magic Naked Flute are goi...
Judges given new guidelines to avoid causing offence
Judges have been given new guidelines to ensure that they do not offend people who appear before them in court. These came to light during a recent case when a judge referred to a person as a 'gypsy'. The clerk of the court produced a document and ad...
Chilean Miners Admit They Were Mining For Semolina
One of the miners trapped in the Chilean Mining Disaster, has admitted in an interview with reporters that he and his colleagues were actually involved in exploratory excavations of semolina.
Semolina is the coarse, purified wheat middlings of dur...
City In Audacious Bid To Sign Chicharito
Manchester - just after opening time - Word on the street here in Cottonopolis is that Sheikh Mansur has instructed Roberto 'Boom Boom' Mancini (who apparently once boxed at Madison Square Garden but didn't write the 'Pink Panther' theme music) to si...
Prince Charles puts his foot in it again
In a rare interview for this month's edition of Reader's Wives (incorporating Suburban Strumpets) magazine, Prince Charles took the opportunity to promote his green manifesto for living, 'Parody: Taking The Piss Out Of The Poor'. The Prince made an i...
Steven Gerrard's Haircut To Blame For Liverpool Derby Disaster
In surprisingly reflective mood, under fire Liverpool boss, Roy Hodgson, still smarting from a 2-0 derby defeat to local rivals Everton at Goodison Park, lay the blame squarely on Steven Gerrard's haircut.
"It was a distraction for the whole team,...
Over 40, married, not interested in sex and heading for divorce
Over 40, married, lack of interest in sex and lost intimacy. Sadly, this is the lot of many spoofers, as their partners start filing for divorce.
On top of a day's work, many spoofers spend endless hours, valiantly trying to entertain the satire h...
Man With The World's Longest Penis Looking For A Fat Bride
Joe Halfyard, the man with the world's longest penis and a member of the Navajo tribe in the Four Corners area of the United States says that he is lonely, that he has money from selling mineral rights and that he is looking for a 'fat bride' who doe...
Luddite invents machine to destroy technology quicker.
A local Luddite movement in Englandshire is up in non-mechanical arms this week, as one of their young brethrens attempt to do a good turn has taken a turn for the unpleasant, with name calling and even some physical gesticulating in the general dire...
UK house market in freefall
Latest figures from the second Bank of England, Northern Rock, have revealed that UK house prices are in freefall. In September, six grand was wiped off the value of an average house, more if it was a posh house and less if it was a caravan or a shed...
Robert Pattinson Checks Himself Into L.A. Clinic
Reports from those closest to actor Robert Pattinson say that the young actor is having some serious mental problems over constant nightmares about his recently discovered ancestor, Vlad the Impaler.
"He's not sleeping well at all", stated one Sou...
Eric Cantona gives Wayne Rooney some helpful advice about the future
Manchester United legend Eric Cantona has spoken about Wayne Rooney's decision to leave the Old Trafford club and has offered him some helpful advice as to his next move.
'If the tomato slips out of the cheese and tomato sandwich' said Cantona 'do...
Alex "Euromillions" Reid dumps Jordan
Alex Reid has sensationally dumped Jordan, real name Katie Price, after he revealed he has won the Euromillions lottery.
Alex Reid issued a statement today thanking his adoring fans for all their support but said that wife Jordan can "Go and do...
'Pregnant' Kate Middleton in morning sickness horror!
Windsor - (Nauseating News): So when does a 5am throwing up in the Castle moat constitute pregnancy rather than a classic binge-drinking overflow?
Palace courtiers are divided this weekend amid reports Kate Middleton chundered her guts out in a cl...
Manchester United's Chicharito's Football Poster Outselling Wayne Rooney's By A Ten To One Margin
MANCHESTER, England - The 22-year-old football sensation from Guadalajara, Jalisco, Mexico, Javier Hernandez Balcazar is being hailed as one of the best young talents to come around in a long time.
"Chicharito" or little pea, as he is called first...
Taylor Lautner Planning Revenge On Robert Pattinson, Adam Lambert
After taking quite a bit of joking recently for growing a beard and mustache, Robert Pattinson decided he would get back at Taylor Lautner and "accidentally" give out the news that Taylor might be gay.
"Two can play at that game", stated Pattinson...
Nigella Lawson's New Series To Boost Bra Sales
Bra sales at big girls' underwear stores like Bravissimo are set to rocket as top totty TV cook Nigella Lawson began a new TV series last night.
Ms Lawson's new series, Nigella Kitchen, launched a 13-week run with an episode featuring such delight...
Miley Cyrus Says She Is Planning On Marrying Her Ex-Boyfriend Liam Hemsworth
BEVERLY HILLS - Miley Cyrus' bass guitarist has stated that Miley confided to him that she has missed being with her ex-boyfriend Liam Hemsworth so much that she wants to marry him as soon as possible.
The bass guitarist, who did not want to divul...
Phil Mickelson Chases Tiger Woods Around Clubhouse With A Driver!
Wales, England - After a fairly good day on the links for Tiger Woods, you would think that he and Phil Mickelson would be able to put behind differences and maybe even enjoy a beer together, but that is apparently not what happened.
"It started o...
Russel Brand and Katy Perry Invite Tareq and Michaele Salahi (The White House Party Crashers) To Their Wedding In India
JAIPUR, India - Russell Brand and Katy Perry have announced that they have indeed invited the so called White House Party Crashers Tareq and his wife Michaele Salahi to their exquisite wedding.
Brand stated that the soon-to-be-married couple decid...
X-Factor fan James Hewitt woo's Cheryl Cole, Prince Harry furious
According to 'sources', there is nothing James Hewitt likes more these days than to sit down on a Saturday evening and dribble at the television when Cheryl Cole is on. A close friend of Hewitt's revealed he has sent a number of emails to Cheryl's ma...
Chilean Miners Decide to Stay Down There
This morning the drill broke through into the chamber holding the 33 Chilean gold miners. A voice came up the 700 metre shaft saying, "We're staying down here! Go Away!"
The spokesman for the trapped Chilean miners Aaron Mateo explained: "We've be...
Rob Pattinson and Emma Watson secretly dating?
Few people realise that Emma Watson, better known as Hermione Granger from Harry Potter, and Rob Pattinson, better known as the blood sucking hearthrob from Twilight, actually went to school together, the Tower House school in London.
Both Watson...
Defence cuts to reduce Royal Navy to smallest size
In a desperate bid to save two new aircraft carriers which are under construction, Royal Navy chiefs have agreed with government demands to reduce the number of warships in the fleet by almost 75%. This move will cut the Navy down to a size last seen...
X-Factor's Cher Lloyd Says Getting Booed Has Hurt Her Sexual Ego
LONDON - The 17-year-old X-Factor student Cher Lloyd, from Malvern, Worcestershire, has stated that getting booed at the Tinie Tempah concert was not only shocking, but disgusting, horrendous, and bordering on lunaticesque.
She stated that it has...
Cher Lloyd And Katie Waissel Need A 'Bloody Good Seeing To' And Kicking Off The X-Factor Says Local Man Who Supports The 'Reinstate Gamu Nhengu' Movement
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, even grumpier than usual following a visit to the dentist which he described as 'painful' today added his weight (or lack of) to the X-Factor corruption scandal, although he did fall short of challenging 5'3" sex Goddes...
Chicharito Strikes Again!
Fresh from his exertions against Stoke City and long throw-up expert Rory Delap, Javier Hernandez, also known as Chicharito - the little pea - popped up out of his pod again at Old Trafford last night to bag the winner for Manchester United as the Re...
Man refused residence in UK
John Bull has been refused the right of permanent residence in the UK. This is despite both his parents being British, his father having served as an officer in the Coldstream Guards. Additionally, Mr Bull's three daughters and grandson all live in t...
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