Funny story:  A Better Gauge of Just How Big that Oil Slick is

A Better Gauge of Just How Big that Oil Slick is

If you've been watching news coverage of the oil spill off the southern coast of the United States, you no doubt have heard all kinds of comparisons as to the size of the slick. Seems it started out about the size of the state of Rhode Island, and then graduated to the size of Delaware. One newscaster claims it is the size of Nevada, and more recently, apparently not wanting to keep the sizing to...
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Funny story:  Volcanic Ash Causes Travel Chaos... Again

Volcanic Ash Causes Travel Chaos... Again

Bus journeys have been halted as another volcanic ash cloud looms over Wharfedale and parts of Nidderdale in the Yorkshire Dales. Many travellers faced further misery as a six hour no-bus zone was imposed as far as Buckden. Bus companies warned p...
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Funny story:  Village Post Office Takes Over Pub

Village Post Office Takes Over Pub

Like many village pubs these days, the Plough Inn at Wigglesworth is closing down. However, the local Post Office remains open and will provide a service for drinkers. Customers will be able to pay up front for a range of beers and spirits - whic...
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Funny story:  Honolulu to be renamed Honoruru by request of Japanese Tourist Community

Honolulu to be renamed Honoruru by request of Japanese Tourist Community

In these trying times, residents of Honolulu, Hawaii are doing everything they can to attract more tourists-including changing the town's name. "As a Japanese tourist, I find it difficult to say Honolulu and I am so happy about the name change. N...
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Funny story:  Supermarket Opens Mini-Outlet in New Express Toilets

Supermarket Opens Mini-Outlet in New Express Toilets

Britain's largest supermarket chain, Tesdabury's continued its rapid expansion by opening, this week, its newest location in the toilets of an existing Tesdabury's Express in Newland Avenue, Hull. "Tesdabury's customers just can't stand being far...
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Funny story:  Schlesinger Tipped For Energy Post

Schlesinger Tipped For Energy Post

Former US Nuclear Energy Secretary, James Schlesinger, became the first person to end up as a court-yard light post. Mr Schlesinger, who died suddenly last week, had strongly advocated the harnessing of human radiation sources, and had made prior...
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Funny story:  Kelly Clarkson's Hit Song "I Thought I Heard Him Say Suck It" Hits #1

Kelly Clarkson's Hit Song "I Thought I Heard Him Say Suck It" Hits #1

CHICAGO - Kelly Clarkson was in town to sing the National Anthem at a Chicago Cubs games when she was asked about her most recent song. Clarkson, beamed with pride, as she said that her song "I Thought I Heard Him Say Suck It" went from being numb...
View 'Kelly Clarkson's Hit Song "I Thought I Heard Him Say Suck It" Hits #1'
Funny story:  Labour candidate for Bootle attacked by dog

Labour candidate for Bootle attacked by dog

Joe Benton, the candidate for Bootle on Merseyside, was pushing leaflets through the letterbox of a house in Gonville Road when he was attacked by a Pitbull-type dog, taking the tip of his right-hand index finger. In a similar incident in the next...
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Funny story:  Exit Polls suggest shock result

Exit Polls suggest shock result

Exit Polls suggest that tonight will be the very last night that Britain is governed by a normal party. The exit polls suggest that by tomorrow our country will be ruled by a party that only has decadence and human destruction as its main political...
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Funny story:  Neanderthals have relatives in Essex

Neanderthals have relatives in Essex

Neanderthals are not totally extinct, in some of us they live on - a little bit... or maybe a lot... Something that we knew all along has been disclosed by Professor Svante Paabo, Max Planck Institute for Evolutionary Anthropology. Prof. Paabo...
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Funny story:  Somali Pirates No Match for Siobhan Magnus' Scream

Somali Pirates No Match for Siobhan Magnus' Scream

LOS ANGELES, California - Unarmed security guards deterred a gang of pirates this Thursday, delivering earsplitting shrieks in their direction when they attempted to board a ship off the coast of Africa, said a spokesman for Kathie Lee Festival Tours...
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Funny story:  Soda Line Ruptures; Coca-Cola To Attempt Unprecedented Capping Fix

Soda Line Ruptures; Coca-Cola To Attempt Unprecedented Capping Fix

INDIANAPOLIS, IN (Friggemall Wire Services) - Coca-Cola has announced plans to cap a ruptured line in an unprecedented attempt to stop the flow of soda that threatens a near northside restaurant. The Chuck E. Cheese was thrown into chaos last Frid...
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Funny story:  UKIP If You Want To, But I've Got To Land The Plane!

UKIP If You Want To, But I've Got To Land The Plane!

Nick Farage attempted the first Kamikaze attack on a UK polling station earlier today. Sadly his attempt met with failure and he is recovering in hospital. Farage had planned to take out all the people who were not voting for him in his Buckingha...
View 'UKIP If You Want To, But I've Got To Land The Plane!'
Funny story:  Prince Charles Saved From Death By Big Ears

Prince Charles Saved From Death By Big Ears

Prince Charles has had a miraculous escape following a fall from the top floor of Buckingham Palace. He fell several feet, until his ears became stuck in a metal grid. Charles was left dangling eight floors above the Mall whilst the changing of t...
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Funny story:  The Philadelphia Phillies Organization Has Scheduled A "Taser Night"

The Philadelphia Phillies Organization Has Scheduled A "Taser Night"

PHILADELPHIA - The Philadelphia Phillies organization hoping to ward off dozens of more fans running onto the field during Phillies baseball games has decided to schedule a "Taser Night." Julie Carolina Fiffenbacker, 51, a spokesperson for the Phi...
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Funny story:  Susan Boyle votes Labour, but don't tell the fanatics

Susan Boyle votes Labour, but don't tell the fanatics

Susan Boyle cast her vote in the UK General Election today for the Labour Party. It is not a surprise as she lives in an area of Scotland steeped in the socialist workers struggle against the bosses. She proudly wore a red scarf to show her alleg...
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Funny story:  Rafa Benitez To Replace Sir Alex Ferguson

Rafa Benitez To Replace Sir Alex Ferguson

Rafa Benitez is being lined up as the shock choice to replace Sir Alex Ferguson as manager of Manchester United. When Ferguson eventually retires Old Trafford chiefs plan to appoint Benitez. The announcement shocked many at first. Lifelong Manches...
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Funny story:  Arizona Sherrif Joe Arpaio: "Hey I Ain't Afraid of No Mexican Drug Cartels - I'll Arrest 'Em and Make 'Em Wear Pink Serapes!"

Arizona Sherrif Joe Arpaio: "Hey I Ain't Afraid of No Mexican Drug Cartels - I'll Arrest 'Em and Make 'Em Wear Pink Serapes!"

MARICOPA COUNTY, Arizona - Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio was asked what he thinks about the rumors that the Mexican drug cartels have put out the word that they want him to pack up his pink wardrobe and move up to Alaska as soon as possible.
View 'Arizona Sherrif Joe Arpaio: "Hey I Ain't Afraid of No Mexican Drug Cartels - I'll Arrest 'Em and Make 'Em Wear Pink Serapes!"'
Funny story:  X Factor Star Lloyd Daniels Seriously Injured In Car Crash

X Factor Star Lloyd Daniels Seriously Injured In Car Crash

Reports in this morning on Good Morning America say that Lloyd Daniels has wrecked his new Mini after taking X-Factor singer Lucie Jones to a London tube station. "Mr. Daniels is lucky to be alive", stated one nurse after Daniels was rushed to the...
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Funny story:  The New Miley Cyrus Video "Can't Be Tamed" Banned in Utah, Massachusetts, and Portugal

The New Miley Cyrus Video "Can't Be Tamed" Banned in Utah, Massachusetts, and Portugal

LOS ANGELES - The brand new highly erotic Miley Cyrus video "Can't Be Tamed" has been prohibited from being shown in Utah, Massachusetts, and Portugal. The two American states and European country have all passed proclamations prohibiting the vide...
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Funny story:  Brown: Vote for me or The Puppy Gets It!

Brown: Vote for me or The Puppy Gets It!

With just hours to go before the polls close Gordon Brown has made a last desperate attempt to influence the undecided and those who have yet to vote. In a shocking video released onto FaceTube this afternoon Brown is shown in a string vest holdin...
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Funny story:  SuBo votes Loonie in General Election!

SuBo votes Loonie in General Election!

Susan Boyle was spotted in her home town earlier, having just voted in the general election. Although she wouldn't reveal who she'd voted for, it is believed to have been the 'Red Scarf Loonie Party'. The local candidate was yesterday despatched to h...
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Funny story:  Arizona Governor Signs Bill Banning Movie "Machete" from Theaters

Arizona Governor Signs Bill Banning Movie "Machete" from Theaters

Phoenix, AZ - Arizona Governor, Jan Brewer, is on a roll lately, signing a number of bills into law that have the Hispanic and Latino communities in Arizona, and around the world, wondering what the hell is bugging her. This time, she's going afte...
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Funny story:  Deepak Chopra Finally Admits We're Screwed

Deepak Chopra Finally Admits We're Screwed

Mind-Body Medicine guru Deepak Chopra, author of such books as "The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success" and "The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire," has done a complete about face and is now giving lectures based on his belief that the time for fixing t...
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Funny story:  Mumbai Gunman Mohammad Kasab Not Pleased About Death Sentence

Mumbai Gunman Mohammad Kasab Not Pleased About Death Sentence

Mohammad Kasab, the smiling Pakistani gunman who helped in the shooting of 53 people at Mumbai's Chatrapati Shivagi Terminus railway station, was sentenced to death today by an Indian court. Kasab - allegedly trained as a 'fedayeen' in Pakistan -...
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Funny story:  American Idol Kicks Little Aaron Kelly Back To High School

American Idol Kicks Little Aaron Kelly Back To High School

HOLLYWOOD - This week's American Idol mentor was Harry Connick, Jr. (ah who the heck was Harry Connick, Senior???). Connick [pronounced: JOKE-ster] sounds like Frank Sinatra when he sings, he looks like ex-Dallas Cowboys quarterback Troy Aikman, a...
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Funny story:  New Motorcycle Company Targets Metrosexuals

New Motorcycle Company Targets Metrosexuals

New York, NY - Metro Motors International, an upstart motorcycle company that is a serious up-and-comer in the luxury motorcycle sector, has just announced their latest and most fashion-forward offering to date. Called the MSX Swiftglide, this sp...
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Funny story:  Cheryl Cole Wears Almost Nothing  In Stage Duel With Resqué Fergie

Cheryl Cole Wears Almost Nothing In Stage Duel With Resqué Fergie

The Black-Eyed Peas tour hit London last night and fans received a bonus as the support act of Cheryl Cole tried to dress less than lead singer, Fergie. "Every time one appeared, they would be dressed with even less", stated one Black-Eye Pea fan.
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Funny story:  Chubby Brown comments on latest article by Lady Godiva

Chubby Brown comments on latest article by Lady Godiva

Well hell's bells. Who the 'ell does Lady G. think she is talking about and why the f**k is she botherin' to waste 'er time talking about a freaking loony like Hitler, who, by the way, we know is long gone at 'is own freaking hand. Meself, A think she's off her head. So - Adolf is now NOT to blame for all the crap in the 2nd World War. His doctors are being blamed. Seems Adolf was an ordinar...
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Funny story:  Iceland Responsible For Everything Claims Conspiracy Theorist

Iceland Responsible For Everything Claims Conspiracy Theorist

Whilst everybody is all too painfully aware, Iceland is without doubt responsible for the volcanic eruption which resulted in the grounding of air traffic in northern Europe, but not too many realise that, in fact, Iceland is ultimately responsible f...
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Funny story:  CBS News Katie Couric, Pope Benedict XVI Apologize For language On Live TV

CBS News Katie Couric, Pope Benedict XVI Apologize For language On Live TV

The Columbia Broadcasting Company has issued an apology that was read by anchor woman, Katie Couric Tuesday concerning her recent interview with the Pope. Although they were in two different countries, the interview was live and was supposed to b...
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Funny story:  Attack Of The Killer Baby-Buggies

Attack Of The Killer Baby-Buggies

Not content with reeling beneath a malevolent cloud of volcanic ash, besieged Brits are now under the savage onslaught of malevolent baby-buggies. Following a successful damages claim lodged against a leading baby-buggy manufacturer involving a ch...
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Funny story:  Derek Acorah fronts new Yeast Based Product Campaign

Derek Acorah fronts new Yeast Based Product Campaign

The Yeast Based Product Smarmite, beloved or hated product that it is, has recently been using the General Election as part of its advertising. With the election finishing, Smarmite are looking for a new angle. "For years, we've used the Love it o...
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Funny story:  Crossing Guard with OCD Run Down by Impatient Businessman

Crossing Guard with OCD Run Down by Impatient Businessman

Nolanville, VA - Every weekday morning at 3 a.m., 45 year old George Ross puts on his pants for the third time, combs every strand of hair separately and plucks any wayward nose hairs. He measures one teaspoon of sugar into his carefully prepared cup...
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Funny story:  Cameron left red faced after ballot blunder

Cameron left red faced after ballot blunder

Tory hopeful David Cameron was left red faced this morning after realising he had spoiled his own ballot paper. When talking to the press outside Spelsbury Memorial Hall in Witney he smiled widely when asked who had got his vote. "Well I can te...
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Funny story:  Times Square Bomber Revealed:  Peter Sellers!

Times Square Bomber Revealed: Peter Sellers!

An embarrassed Homeland Security Secretary, Janet Napolitano, appeared before the press this morning and admitted that the Homeland Security Department, the FBI, the NYPD, and agents of the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives(ATF), we...
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Funny story:  "Get A Job Chunky Boy!" Cameron Goads Prime Minister

"Get A Job Chunky Boy!" Cameron Goads Prime Minister

In an astonishing outburst of what many describe as childish tit-for-tat baiting, (read: typical politics) David Cameron revealed his inner right wing leanings by goading the PM in a West End sushi bar, as the voters decide their respective destinies...
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Funny story:  IMF Proposes "Do Over" For All Currencies & Economies: Operation Flip Over the Monopoly Board

IMF Proposes "Do Over" For All Currencies & Economies: Operation Flip Over the Monopoly Board

International Monetary Fund Managing Director, Dominique Strauss-Kahn has presented the world with a massive "Do Over" suggestion. "It's fairly obvious that the current global economic situation sucks right now. We propose a plan that will elimin...
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Funny story:  One Last Helping Hand From The Tories

One Last Helping Hand From The Tories

In a last ditch attempt to mobilise the male youth vote, the least represented demographic at Parliamentary Elections, the Tory Party have announced plans to institutionalise masturbation. They are claiming that bashing the bishop has positive effect...
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Funny story:  Tactical Voter Shoots Himself In Polling Station

Tactical Voter Shoots Himself In Polling Station

The first casualty of the UK 2010 General Election was reported just moments after polling stations opened, when Bolton man Krystov Kowalski, a construction worker, shot himself in the kneecap with a nail gun as he attempted to lodge a tactical vote.
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Funny story:  Party Political Broadcast on Behalf of The Labour Party

Party Political Broadcast on Behalf of The Labour Party

Manish Sood, Norfolk: There now follows a Party political broadcast on behalf of the Labour Party. "The way I was brought up, both my Mum and Dad were staunch Labour Party supporters and they still are. My Dad was a well known politician and my Brother was a well known politician and that is the way I was educated." "I was born in the Labour Party. Before I was born I was part of the Labo...
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Funny story:  Underwhelming turnout for 2010 General Election

Underwhelming turnout for 2010 General Election

Early indications suggest that this will be a record turnout for the 2010 election. An apathetic record. Polls Watchdog, X-marks-the-spotCom, say early indications are that less than 1% of the electorate will turn out today. Watchdog spokesper...
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Funny story:  Man votes Lib Dem just to spite wife

Man votes Lib Dem just to spite wife

A man emerged from a polling station this morning and announced to waiting press that he had voted for the Liberal Democrats "just to spite his wife." The man, whose day had reportedly got off to a bad start when he couldn't find his electric razo...
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Funny story:  Lock in at No.10?

Lock in at No.10?

Mystery surrounds Gordon Brown's early trip to B & Q this morning. Mr Brown left before 8am. returning with hammer, nails and a bundle of planks. Observers say that for the next hour banging and swearing was heard from inside the premises and...
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Funny story:  Kerry Katona and Katie Price camera crews fight

Kerry Katona and Katie Price camera crews fight

Was it bad planning or a publicity stunt, but this morning on the street outside Riverside hotel in London Kerry Katona was coming out as Katie Price was going in. Kerry Katona is currently wooing Katie Price's ex-husband, Peter Andre, which has a...
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Funny story:  The Elisabeth Hasselbeck - Erin Andrews Feud Turns Ugly!

The Elisabeth Hasselbeck - Erin Andrews Feud Turns Ugly!

HOLLYWOOD - Barbara Walters of The View did her best to try and diffuse the big verbal feud between fellow View host Elisabeth Hasselbeck and Dancing With The Stars castoff, Erin Andrews. Hasselbeck, the somewhat prettier version of GOPrincess Ann...
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Funny story:  Kindles Overworked, May Go Out on Strike

Kindles Overworked, May Go Out on Strike

Kindles, Amazon's electronic readers, are not happy campers. They are disgusted that Amazon has announced a new software update for the Kindle, providing many more services. "Lots more work for the exact same pay," Head Kindle Hedda complained...
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Funny story:  Dancing With The Stars: Carrie Ann Inaba Says She Is Cheryl Burke's Mother

Dancing With The Stars: Carrie Ann Inaba Says She Is Cheryl Burke's Mother

HOLLYWOOD - After being told that the International Inquirer was going to print an exposé showing that Dancing With The Stars' judge Carrie Ann Inaba is the biological mother of DWTS professional dancer Cheryl Burke, Inaba decided to reveal the truth...
View 'Dancing With The Stars: Carrie Ann Inaba Says She Is Cheryl Burke's Mother'
Funny story:  President Obama Books The Hip Hop Rap Band, Camel Carl & The Desert Rag Headz To Play At "The First Mama's" Mothers' Day Party

President Obama Books The Hip Hop Rap Band, Camel Carl & The Desert Rag Headz To Play At "The First Mama's" Mothers' Day Party

CHEYENNE, Wyoming - President Obama was in Cheyenne addressing the annual convention of The Wyoming Bison Breeders Coalition and Association. The president stated "Now lissen up y'all. Dem buffaloes is still a very important and integral part of d...
View 'President Obama Books The Hip Hop Rap Band, Camel Carl & The Desert Rag Headz To Play At "The First Mama's" Mothers' Day Party'
Funny story:  Friend Defends Rekers: "It Makes Sense to Hire a Gay Hooker to Carry Your Luggage"

Friend Defends Rekers: "It Makes Sense to Hire a Gay Hooker to Carry Your Luggage"

George Rekers was accompanied on a 10-day trip to Europe by a gay male prostitute. Rekers, a Baptist minister and board member of the National Association for Research & Therapy of Homosexuality, has denied having a sexual relationship with the...
View 'Friend Defends Rekers: "It Makes Sense to Hire a Gay Hooker to Carry Your Luggage"'
Funny story:  Value of Pi Changed; Some Feel 'This Will Change Everything'

Value of Pi Changed; Some Feel 'This Will Change Everything'

WASHINGTON, DC - Leading scientists and researchers announced today that the long-held value of pi (3.14159265) is incorrect. The new value of pi has been copyrighted and will not be available free of charge. It will instead be made available in di...
View 'Value of Pi Changed; Some Feel 'This Will Change Everything''
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