Funny story:  Apple's iBalls Set To Replace IVF

Apple's iBalls Set To Replace IVF

Apple has announced its next must-have personal accessory, the iBalls. Marketed mainly at men, the iBalls will let users determine the gender, looks and intelligence of their children. Combining a mobile version of The Sims game, and genetic in...
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Funny story:  Deepak Chopra Claims He's Definitely Not Lady Gaga's Spiritual Advisor

Deepak Chopra Claims He's Definitely Not Lady Gaga's Spiritual Advisor

A recent news story claims that Lady Gaga gets most of her material for her songs from her nightmares, and when she is having a particularly difficult time deciphering what her dreams mean, she seeks the wise advice of Deepak Chopra. "This simply...
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Funny story:  Taylor Lautner One of The Stars of "The Twilight Saga: Eclipse" Has Sure Ignited Quite A Firestorm Feud Between Dakota Fanning and Boo Boo Stewart

Taylor Lautner One of The Stars of "The Twilight Saga: Eclipse" Has Sure Ignited Quite A Firestorm Feud Between Dakota Fanning and Boo Boo Stewart

HOLLYWOOD - Taylor Lautner who stars as Jacob Black in The Twilight Saga: Eclipse says that he has always been a practical joker. He once took a black Sharpie Pen and drew the Eiffel Tower on Jay Leno's chin while Leno slept at his desk. Another t...
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Funny story:  Japanese Team Members Attempt Hari-Kari after Loss to Paraguay

Japanese Team Members Attempt Hari-Kari after Loss to Paraguay

When the World Cup game between Japan and Paraguay ended in a tie, the game went into overtime. Still there was no score. The game finally ended in penalty kicks when Paraguay beat Japan 5-4. One Japanese team member, Yuichi Komano, missed his penalt...
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Funny story:  "Job Cuts Will Not Lead To Higher Unemployment" - Chancellor

"Job Cuts Will Not Lead To Higher Unemployment" - Chancellor

The Government is to balance job losses from budget cuts by cutting welfare benefits, so getting people straight back to work. In an interview with Cloud 9 news, the chancellor Geogre Osborne said, "Too many people, mainly disabled, ill or just pl...
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Funny story:  'Paris Hilton, Marc Mezvinsky Lewinsky and Heath Ledger RIP??' Aldrich Ames and Bob Hanssen recruited at least another 100 moles!

'Paris Hilton, Marc Mezvinsky Lewinsky and Heath Ledger RIP??' Aldrich Ames and Bob Hanssen recruited at least another 100 moles!

Washington AC/DC - (Deep Penetration News): Du Pont Circle salons are in uproar amid reports detailing why traitors Ames and Hanssen are shitting bricks in jail this evening: A ten year classified probe into the renegades' recruitment skills has...
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Funny story:  UK Bank wants to be 'helpful'

UK Bank wants to be 'helpful'

Banks have always been different from other enterprises. For example, suppose you frequent the local butcher. You would expect him to be helpful and fair everytime you visit or you would probably go somewhere else. However, banks need only be nice on...
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Funny story:  Jessica Alba Convinces Fan Not To Get Plastic Surgery To Look Like Her

Jessica Alba Convinces Fan Not To Get Plastic Surgery To Look Like Her

Actress Jessica Alba has talked a loyal fan into not having surgery to look like Alba. The fan had broken up with their partner and knew that Alba was both of their favorites. So a plan was launched so that the fan, Xiaojian of China, would have plas...
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Funny story:  Lady Gaga Protests Findings That Viagra Doesn't Affect Women!

Lady Gaga Protests Findings That Viagra Doesn't Affect Women!

According to ABC Good Morning America, Lady Gaga is protesting the recent findings that Viagra doesn't help women sexually. She began by parading on Times Square, showing a huge boner after everyone saw her a pill. She was later joined by Cher's d...
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Funny story:  Twilight's Taylor Lautner Arrested!

Twilight's Taylor Lautner Arrested!

A very surprised Taylor Lautner was handcuffed and taken away by police while with the crew of Twilight Eclipse Tuesday morning. "What am I being arrested for?", requested the actor. But the police officers would only read him his rights. Appea...
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Funny story:  Russian spies linked to UK supermarket chain  'behind London 7/7 bombings'

Russian spies linked to UK supermarket chain 'behind London 7/7 bombings'

London - (B-O-G-O-F Mess): A UK supermarket group suspected of being 'up to its ass' in terrorism has emerged as the eminence grise behind the US spy saga. The food retailer had been under covert surveillance for decades ever since Princess Diana...
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Funny story:  SPY vs SPY: Putin Accuses Obama Of Planting Bug In Medvedev's Burger

SPY vs SPY: Putin Accuses Obama Of Planting Bug In Medvedev's Burger

Vladimir Putin, former Russian KGB officer and now Prime Minister, today accused President Obama of planting a bug in Russian President Dmitri Medvedev's hamburger. Last week, Obama and Medvedev traveled by motorcade from the White House to eat lunc...
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Funny story:  Ford to Sell Edsel Brand to French Automaker Peugeot

Ford to Sell Edsel Brand to French Automaker Peugeot

Wilbur Ford, President of the Edsel division of Ford Motor Company, announced today the sale of the Edsel brand to European automaker Peugeot. The sale, if approved by Ford stockholders, will be the second division of Ford Motor Company to be cast as...
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Funny story:  Poindexter need not worry about sex aboard the Space Station

Poindexter need not worry about sex aboard the Space Station

Poindexter need no longer worry about sex on board the International Space Station. Astronomers believe there will be regular bombardments from comet debris, due later this year, which could strike orbiting spacecraft knocking out electronics. Th...
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Funny story:  Tesco sold for £1

Tesco sold for £1

Tesco is to be sold for £1 after it has emerged staff in Cardiff have been giving credit or 'tick' to family members for the past 4yrs. Bankers stated the fraudulent situation would of been manageable for the odd loaf or pint of milk but since the...
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Funny story:  H&R Block Says 'Peace of Mind' Defends Against Tax Errors, Keeps Hands Soft, Will Cook an Entire Turkey In One Hour, Will Guard Against Rust and Will Make Your Laundry April Fresh

H&R Block Says 'Peace of Mind' Defends Against Tax Errors, Keeps Hands Soft, Will Cook an Entire Turkey In One Hour, Will Guard Against Rust and Will Make Your Laundry April Fresh

"H&R Block Says 'Peace of Mind' Defends Against Tax Errors, Keeps Hands Soft, Will Cook an Entire Turkey In One Hour, Will Guard Against Rust and Will Make Your Laundry April Fresh." U.S. District Judge Michael Reagan, the Judge who is decidin...
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Funny story:  Spies revealed

Spies revealed

As the United States reveals the machinations of 10 Russian spies, who the FBI have been watching for five years, the consequences for Britain are being discussed. Who is spying on our Think Tanks? What tricks are the Russians up to getting close...
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Funny story:  How A-levels are taught in comprehensives

How A-levels are taught in comprehensives

Read this hypothetical discussion between Bradley and Leavis and make notes on their differences in opinion. Will be reporting back in 20 mins. bradmeister: lol @ iago pwning the Moor leavis.fr.69: othello failed :D bradmeister: yh but that was serious ownage leavis.fr.69: nt really...othello was a n00b bradmeister: othello is a chuck norris of poetry leavis.fr.69: othello thinks...
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Funny story:  Federal Court to Decide on Fate of H&R Block "Peace Of Mind" Suit

Federal Court to Decide on Fate of H&R Block "Peace Of Mind" Suit

U.S. District Judge Michael Reagan is focusing on millions of clients who bought H&R Block's Peace of Mind "Insurance" product as he decides whether to certify a 13-year old class action for 11 states. Hundreds of thousands of H&R Block's...
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Funny story:  Singles Adverts

Singles Adverts

Male Seeking Female Aged over 40? Well educated? Like wine, the arts, long walks in the countryside? Yes? Well fuck off then, I'm looking for an 18 year old vacuous size six stunner with massive tits, no brain and absolutely no opinion on anything. Must be able to iron, cook and give a decent blowjob. Female Seeking Male Bitter, unsuccessful, middle aged, spastic wallowing in my own...
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Funny story:  Cristiano Ronaldo: "I'm better than Messi"

Cristiano Ronaldo: "I'm better than Messi"

Real Madrid and Portugese winger Cristiano Ronaldo insists 'Lionel Messi is the most overrated player ever to grace a football pitch.' The Portugese superstar believes he is better, and has apparent hard evidence to back this up. "Just take a l...
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Funny story:  Manchester United sign Emile Heskey

Manchester United sign Emile Heskey

Manchester United manager Sir Alex Ferguson has yet again shocked the world by making which some call the shrewdest of shrewd buying. He has picked up Emile Heskey at an extremely low price of 23 million pounds. "I am very happy to be at a club th...
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Funny story:  Capello sent to rehab

Capello sent to rehab

England manager Fabio Capello was arrested earlier today for assaulting German national football team coach Joachim Low. Apparently the two manager were enjoying a peaceful beer together when suddenly, Capello smashed his bottle over Mr. Low's head.
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Funny story:  Gary Neville 'has had enough'

Gary Neville 'has had enough'

Manchester United superstar right back sensation Gary Neville has issues a plea for the world to stop hating him. "Yes I know I've been a cunt, but that's all in the past. I'm a completely changed man," Neville was interviewed earlier this week. "...
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Funny story:  Golfing Obama Hires Jon Daly as his 'Swing Coach' in Continuing Efforts to 'clear his mind' Admidst Mounting Global Meltdowns!

Golfing Obama Hires Jon Daly as his 'Swing Coach' in Continuing Efforts to 'clear his mind' Admidst Mounting Global Meltdowns!

Amateur golfers, all of whom are taxpayers, were said to be speechless today after it was announced on the Golf Channel, that Jon Daly had been hired by the Democratic National Committee (DNC) to work with the President who was said to be 'unable to...
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Funny story:  Job Opportunity!

Job Opportunity!

Famous actresses and fashion models are busy people. So, when it comes to that time of month, they'd rather concentrate on other things. Which is where you come in. As a trained Tampon Insertion Technician it will be your job to see there are no messy accidents. No previous experience necessary as full training is provided. You don't even need any educational qualifications. Just good eyes...
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Funny story:  World Cup Referee Wins Man Of The Match Award In Japan v Paraguay Game

World Cup Referee Wins Man Of The Match Award In Japan v Paraguay Game

Sports reporting can be difficult. Today Japan played Paraguay in the round of 16, and following a mind-numbingly dull encounter, Paraguay progressed into the last 8 following the first penalty shoot-out of the tournament. In a match utterly devoi...
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Funny story:  Gore Announces Two Hybrid Cars He Sponsors are "Clean" - Run Only on Taxpayer Money!

Gore Announces Two Hybrid Cars He Sponsors are "Clean" - Run Only on Taxpayer Money!

Two of just hundreds of Green Schemes devised by Al "Big Horn Dawg" Gore, continue to not only survive but thrive on taxpayer money as it was announced today Fisker Motors was buying an abandoned GM plant in Delaware, and Tesla Motors was approved...
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Funny story:  English Footballers Hope They Never Hear A Vuvuzela Again!

English Footballers Hope They Never Hear A Vuvuzela Again!

"Those stupid things were so loud we couldn't concentrate", stated Goalkeeper Robert Green yelling at the top of his lungs. "I still can't hear shit!" That's probably a good thing because most of England's fans had some choice words for him for bl...
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Funny story:  Ashley Cole's New Squeeze - Is She A Lithuanian Lap Dancer?

Ashley Cole's New Squeeze - Is She A Lithuanian Lap Dancer?

Her name is Sarah Parnell, she's a lap dancer, she looks a little bit like Cheryl by all accounts, and according to some sources, she comes originally from Lithuania. Oh, and she's Ashley Cole's new girl friend. Allegedly. She claims to have se...
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Funny story:  Mossad Dubai hit squad passport forgers implicated in USA's Russian spy ring

Mossad Dubai hit squad passport forgers implicated in USA's Russian spy ring

London - (Aldrich Ames Mess): The spotlight is on a UK-based KGB passport forgery gang suspected of issuing fake IDs to a Mossad hit squad behind the Dubai assassination of Hanmas operative Mahmoud al-Mabhouh. The shadowy counterfeitters are belie...
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Funny story:  Supreme Court:  Right to Life Ends at Birth

Supreme Court: Right to Life Ends at Birth

In a 5-4 decision, the Supreme Court ruled this week that Right to Life ends at birth. The ruling was part of the decision to allow all citizens of the United States to have and to carry weapons. Justice Anthony Scalia speaking for the majority s...
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Funny story:  Exclusive Beckham Interview: I Got the Goldenballs for the England Manager Job

Exclusive Beckham Interview: I Got the Goldenballs for the England Manager Job

For those readers who chose to actually read The Sun newspaper today (instead of using it for its correct purpose - emergency toilet paper); you will have been presented with the argument for David Beckham to take over the reigns of the England job from Fabio Capello. The Suns argument - which ignores the obvious basics like Beckham having no coaching badges, no managerial experience whatsoever...
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Funny story:  Mark Croft: I'll show Kerry Katona sex tapes to judge

Mark Croft: I'll show Kerry Katona sex tapes to judge

Ex-Atomic Kitten, and ex-face of Iceland, Kerry Katona pleaded with ex-husband, Mark Croft, not to show the world the naughty sex tapes that he made during their time together. The two are engaged in a bitter custody battle for their children, and...
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Funny story:  Prisoner's £50,000 toothache causes Taxpayer £50,000 Headache

Prisoner's £50,000 toothache causes Taxpayer £50,000 Headache

A notorious gangland killer has been awarded nearly £50,000 of taxpayers money following reports of inadequate dental care at a top security prison. Food Michael Steel, 82, speaking from his cell, defended the decision. "Look, I've waited 2 wee...
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Funny story:  Pension Age Set to Rise To 100

Pension Age Set to Rise To 100

Secret Government proposals are afoot to raise the pension age to one hundred years old. This comes in the wake of discussions by DWP Minister Ian Dunkel Smyth to raise the retirement age to 70. Under the new proposals, dubbed as work til you d...
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Funny story:  H2 ... Oh !!! - Benefits of Drinking Water Over Exaggerated

H2 ... Oh !!! - Benefits of Drinking Water Over Exaggerated

Millions of health conscious Britons awoke this morning to hear that the health benefits of drinking water may have been over exaggerated A ten year study has concluded that the Great British Cuppa may actually be better for you than water. The re...
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Funny story:  The Dirty Dozen - Ban on ordering eggs in twelves

The Dirty Dozen - Ban on ordering eggs in twelves

Meddling Eurocrats have announced plans for a wholesale ban on ordering eggs by the dozen. Barmy Brussels minister Maris Piper, 56, instead is demanding that the versatile egg is ordered by weight in future. She insists "we've listened to the...
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Funny story:  Disabled march on Number 10

Disabled march on Number 10

The organizers of severely disabled people who are planning to take part in a protest march, over proposed spending cuts, have announced that the group is hoping to reach Number 10 by 2012. That's if all goes well and the wind is behind them.
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Funny story:  UK's Russian spy ring is next say cops

UK's Russian spy ring is next say cops

London - (Clouseau News): The head of Scotland Yard's anti-terror squad says yesterday's FBI bust of Russian sleeper moles is just the begining. Citing hundreds of cold case reviews the Met's Assistant Commissioner for Downright Skulduggery said t...
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Funny story:  Twilight Eclipse star Bryce Dallas Howard knocks the spots off Kristen Stewart

Twilight Eclipse star Bryce Dallas Howard knocks the spots off Kristen Stewart

Hollywood - (Zitty Occultation News): The fiery-haired Village, Lady In the Water, Manderlay, Spider-Man 3, Terminator Salvation, The Loss of a Teardrop Diamond and The Twilight Saga: Eclipse actress is sending bloodpressure rates soaring ahead of...
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Funny story:  Katie's (Cut)-Price Wedding

Katie's (Cut)-Price Wedding

Katie Price's Wedding Blessing to Alex Reid next weekend is set to cost substantially less than her lavish wedding to Peter Andre five years ago, it is reported today. A spokes-person for Katie said 'Katie and Peter's wedding in 2005 cost in exces...
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Funny story:  Einstein was a dozy twat!

Einstein was a dozy twat!

New evidence has emerged about the brilliant mathematician and scientist Albert Einstein. It seems the father of the theory of relativity and e=mcsquared as well as time dilation and curved space time was so absorbed in his work that he forgot to wip...
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Funny story:  Natascha Kampusch probe top cop in gunshot suicide mystery

Natascha Kampusch probe top cop in gunshot suicide mystery

Vienna, Austria - (Dungeonmaster Mess): Police chief Franz Kroell has been found slumped over his Graz apartment balcony with at least one bullet wound to his head, reports allege. The 58 year-old was said to be very unhappy about a Clouseau-ish d...
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Funny story:  Resurrection? Letter sheds some light.

Resurrection? Letter sheds some light.

In America the following letter has just been uncovered under the Freedom of Information Act and is causing some concern in the Bible Belt… Chief of Chaplains, Department of the Navy, 2 Navy Annex, Washington, DC 20370-0400 703-614-4043. Greetings, Chief! My name is Milton P. Smith and I'm a Master Gunnery Sergeant in the United States Marine Corps. The reason I'm writing you i...
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Funny story:  Secret Travel Hot Spots: Brussels and the Pissing Boy

Secret Travel Hot Spots: Brussels and the Pissing Boy

Part five in a series of unique and little known attractions hidden within the world's most popular travel destinations. One of the most visited attractions within the city centre of Bruxelles (Brussels), Belgium is perhaps the smallest in stature and grandeur. While close up pictures tend to feature the cherub with amazing detail suggesting larger scale, the first time visitor may be shocked...
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Funny story:  David Hasselhoff to produce more politically correct, 'Boy-Watch'

David Hasselhoff to produce more politically correct, 'Boy-Watch'

David Hasselhoff is rumoured to be in talks to produce a more 'politically-correct' version of the 90's phenomenon, Bay-Watch. The original programme, starring Hasselhoff as hunky lifeguard Mitch Bucannon, centered on the work of a team of lifegua...
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Funny story:  Life in the trenches

Life in the trenches

Students of the First World War will find letter dated June 5th 1915 interesting... Dearest Mother, Thank you for your last letter and please forgive me for taking so long to reply. The fact that they've collected a large number of white feathers doesn't mean that my brother Harry and his dissolute chums belong to an ornithological society. The thing is, I've been awfully busy fighting...
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Funny story:  Cappelo Works Out Conjoined Twins In Goal; Threatens "Shake Up" After Disaster in South Africa!

Cappelo Works Out Conjoined Twins In Goal; Threatens "Shake Up" After Disaster in South Africa!

Britain's beleaguered, nay, reviled, Football Manager, Fabio Capello, saying "I'm not done yet, Mates," revealed he would be hanging around for two more years and promised a major shakeup in the Three Lion's starting squad. Fabio, speaking throu...
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Funny story:  A suggestion for struggling writers

A suggestion for struggling writers

Unless they strike it rich like J. K. Rowling, writers can often find themselves strapped for cash. (Harry Potter! That was magic, right?) So here's a guaranteed, sure fire, money spinning idea. Are you ready for this? Okay, here it is: OPEN UP A MEN'S BARBER SHOP AND EMPLOY NAKED WOMEN TO CUT THEIR HAIR! Take my word for it, in a few short hours the place will be packed solid. Bald men will b...
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Funny story:  Glastonbury closes with the blind leading the blind!

Glastonbury closes with the blind leading the blind!

This years Glastonbury spectacle was rather a "damp squid" even though there wasn't any of the usual mudslides and heavenly outbursts although "Faithless" did manage to get the geriatric crowd rocking in their wheelchairs! Apart from them ancient...
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Funny story:  FIFA Shake-up needed

FIFA Shake-up needed

After England's display of poor quality football in South Africa, FIFA are to introduce some new rules. From now on the coach should be a National from the country which the team represents and also each player (who plays for the national team) should not play in any other country for their entire football playing career. This would instil a higher degree of patriotism. FIFA have noted that a m...
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Funny story:  Shakespeare wrote Beatles songs!

Shakespeare wrote Beatles songs!

A historian has revealed evidence that the Beatles never wrote their songs but stole them from the famous William Shakespeare. The historian has discovered that the famous "Cavern club" in Liverpool has been in existence since the Romans invaded but in the sixteen hundreds it was a notorious coffee shop and a haunt of the poets and playwright of the day this has continued to the present day.
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Funny story:  FBI hunts Madoff's 'Madame Rouge' as dozens more KGB sleeper cells suspected

FBI hunts Madoff's 'Madame Rouge' as dozens more KGB sleeper cells suspected

New York - (Bob Hanssen Mess): A sinister femme fatale codenamed 'Madame Rouge' - believed to be an ex-mistress of jailed Ponzi scammer Bernard Madoff - is being sought in the FBI Russian espionage probe. The lynchpin behind the KGB money launderi...
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Funny story:  Mick Jagger to meet with FIFA bosses later this week

Mick Jagger to meet with FIFA bosses later this week

Mick Jagger was up in arms, with millions of others, as he watched England's 2nd goal against Germany, hit the ground OVER the white line and then bounce back out. All those who watched the replay were equally shocked as the goal was momentarily...
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Funny story:  Gwyneth Paltrow Gains An Ounce, Has Nervous Breakdown

Gwyneth Paltrow Gains An Ounce, Has Nervous Breakdown

Hollywood, CA - Famous airhead and Oscar-winning actress Gwyneth Paltrow suffered a complete nervous breakdown today after she gained an entire ounce. The sexless skeleton blames a breathe mint she ate last week for the calamity. The tiny toothpick...
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Funny story:  Wayne Rooney 'annoyed' at England team mates & Fabio Capello. None of it his fault.

Wayne Rooney 'annoyed' at England team mates & Fabio Capello. None of it his fault.

Wayne Rooney has been caught having an angry nipper tantrum in the privacy of his bedroom in Merseyside, England. The England squad returned to their country a day ago, after being thrashed 4-1 by Germany in the last 16 of the World Cup. Wayne Roo...
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Funny story:  Ian Dowie named Liverpool manager!

Ian Dowie named Liverpool manager!

Liverpool chairman Martin Broughton has shocked the world with his bizarre decision to elect ex-Hull boss Ian Dowie the managerial position at Liverpool Football Club. "There were not many candidates available," Broughton said in an interview. "It...
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Funny story:  A Question of Time

A Question of Time

Below is a report of a recent trial at the Crown Court in Eastbourne that appeared in the Law Review. The Law Society have expressed some alarm and the report, which contains extracts of Defence Counsel Rowan-Berry QC's cross-examination of the main witness for the prosecution, Detective Inspector Goosegog, is reprinted below. Rowan-Berry: Detective Inspector, would you agree that the deliberat...
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Funny story:  Fear and Loathing on the Internet

Fear and Loathing on the Internet

Before you fire up your favourite browser, that's a geeky joke. As far as I know there's no such website. There should be, but there isn't. The joke being that the Internet is just like the travelling circus in the 1932 film, The Freaks, starring Wallace Ford and the gorgeously Slavonic Olga Baclanova. (The definitely political incorrect poster from this MGM production proclaimed, "Can a Full Grow...
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Funny story:  The Dangers of Human Cloning

The Dangers of Human Cloning

When I arrived at the laboratory, Professor Hung Lo was waiting to greet me. From his reputation I'd expected a charismatic figure. Instead, I was confronted by a little wizened Chinaman who reminded me of the shopkeeper in that film, The Gremlins. Ho said he didn't normally deal with journalists unless they were from the scientific journals. But he'd heard I'd written a series of articles about h...
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Funny story:  Conspiracy Theory No 87769

Conspiracy Theory No 87769

When the Apollo 11 astronauts landed on the lunar surface the last thing they expected to find was that the moon was made of green cheese. But that's precisely what they did find. It was Neil Armstrong who first discovered this amazing fact. Picking up a small moon rock he discovered that it was both crumbly and, when examined closely, had a faint greenish tinge. He took it back to the...
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Funny story:  Tired Old Story

Tired Old Story

England manager, Fabio Capello, has declared that the reason England were so terrible at the World Cup was because the players were tired. This excuse has as much impact as when I used it at school or at work to explain away poor performances.
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Funny story:  FA Minutes Found in Bin!

FA Minutes Found in Bin!

Inchcock Chambers, decrepit unpaid reporter, has discovered half a page of some minutes of a meeting, to discuss proposals for the future development of the England team, in a bin near Alcaster Gate. Here are the details: In attendance: Chairman: Rogered Burden - Vice-chairman: Barry Notbright -General Secretary: Alex Gothehorn - Members: D Gilt (Man Utd) - Roger Burdened (Gloucestershire FA)...
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Funny story:  Alex Reid puts Jordan's children on E-bay

Alex Reid puts Jordan's children on E-bay

In a story that defies belief, Alex Reid has been accused by wife Katie Price of advertising her children for sale on E-bay. Price (32) has three children, Harvey(8), Junior (5) and Princess (3). All three are currently listed for sale on the E-ba...
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Funny story:  PM in projectile storm

PM in projectile storm

Prime Minister David Cameron projectile vomited on a group of ladies yesterday while doing an unscheduled walkabout around the houses of parliament. Keen to promote the new budget, Mr.Cameron exited his bicycle under the shadow of Big Ben and approac...
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Funny story:  The science of sexual chemistry

The science of sexual chemistry

Scientists working on the sexual chemistry of the male human have made some surprising discoveries. They have found that a man who starts to feel sexually attractive to a female either his wife or girlfriend or even a slapper in a bar produces a hor...
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Funny story:  97 year old petshop owning grandma arrested

97 year old petshop owning grandma arrested

Last night frail 97 year old Mary Hinge was behind bars for letting a boy under the age of fourteen walk out of her pet shop with a live flea. She stated that she never asked the boy his age as she didn't see his face because he was wearing a "ho...
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Funny story:  Darwins theory of evolution is bollocks say scientists

Darwins theory of evolution is bollocks say scientists

Scientists studying rocks from 30 million years ago have come up with proof that Darwin's theory is bollocks. The rocks were discovered 50,000 feet below the Atlantic ocean and are proof that the fabled island of Atlantis really existed. The rocks...
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Funny story:  Steven Gerrard Issues an Apology

Steven Gerrard Issues an Apology

Disgraced England Captain, Steven Gerrard, also of Liverpool, arrived back into England this morning to a hostile reception. Clamouring fans were demanding explanations not excuses from the captain and the manager, Fabio Capello. They were disappo...
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Funny story:  Emma Watson Will Not Appear Naked In Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows

Emma Watson Will Not Appear Naked In Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows

Contrary to rumour, actress Emma Watson will not be appearing naked in either of the two part Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows movies. The climax of the Harry Potter series, which sees Harry come face to face with Voldemort, his arch enemy, do...
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Funny story:  Palin on Short List for Reality Show

Palin on Short List for Reality Show

When asked recently, Sarah Palin is denying rumors that she has been approached by Larry David for a part in a new cable reality show concept thought to be titled "The Real Political Skanks of DC". Ex Governor Palin was quoted by friends as sayin...
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Funny story:  Al Gore Reveals Pedigree

Al Gore Reveals Pedigree

Former Vice President, Al Gore, in a startling announcement revealed today that he has a pedigree. "It's true," Gore said. "I'm actually a Poodle." When pressed for which type of Poodle he actually is, Gore stated, "I am a Standard Poodle."...
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Funny story:  Ashley Cole And Ledley King Lined Up For Bayern Munich Move

Ashley Cole And Ledley King Lined Up For Bayern Munich Move

England's laughing cavalier duo, Ashley Cole and Ledley King have been sensationally linked with a move to Bayern Munich. Which may go some way towards explaining England's dire World Cup performances. Sources report that Cole and King had been...
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Funny story:  Obama Denies Relationship

Obama Denies Relationship

Subpoenaed in the trial of Rod Blagojevich, President Barack Obama testified Monday with these words, "Here me and here me well. I did not have an unnatural relationship with that man's hairpiece." Members of the court were perplexed over Obama's...
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Funny story:  H&R Block Get Sued by Tax Pros for Criminally Negligent A--holiness.

H&R Block Get Sued by Tax Pros for Criminally Negligent A--holiness.

H&R Block, the company that last had an innovative idea when Bonanza was on TV, prove that they do not discriminate against who they choose to oppress via a lawsuit by their own employees, challenging the company-wide policy and practice of requi...
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Funny story:  Prince Harry Spotted at NYC Gay Pride March

Prince Harry Spotted at NYC Gay Pride March

New York, NY - Prince Harry was in town for a fun-filled weekend of firsts that included throwing out the first pitch at a New York Mets game, being the first player in a charity polo match to be thrown from his horse (he was not injured), and being...
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Funny story:  Steve Jobs says iPhone 4 Only Responsible for "A Few"  Dead Miners

Steve Jobs says iPhone 4 Only Responsible for "A Few" Dead Miners

Steve Jobs, who played "Gorilla Killed With Boar Femur #3" in 1968's "2001: A Space Odyssey" is still creating self indulgent press releases about the two customer emails a week he bothers to answer. In an e-mail to Jobs on Sunday evening, a cust...
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Funny story:  Stockholm Syndrome Suffering Skank and 90210 Has-Been Marry In Whogivesash-t, Hawaii

Stockholm Syndrome Suffering Skank and 90210 Has-Been Marry In Whogivesash-t, Hawaii

Super hot nutbag Megan Fox married her alleged captor, Brian Austin Green, whose 90210 character was, sadly, not killed off, in a small ceremony attended only by friends of the victim and her abuser. Fox, who most recently was in the news for quit...
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Funny story:  Rays B.J. Upton does Breast Cancer 10k Run in 3 Days, 21 hours, 16 minutes

Rays B.J. Upton does Breast Cancer 10k Run in 3 Days, 21 hours, 16 minutes

BJ (Brisk Jog) Upton, the Tampa Bay Devil R . . . Tampa Bay Rays outfielder who was dressed down by teammates after casually strolling to field a ball hit by Diamondbacks Rusty Ryal in a game last week, attempted to prove that he can run fast by ent...
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Funny story:  Ashley Cole Accused Of Really Taking The Piss

Ashley Cole Accused Of Really Taking The Piss

England's much criticised left back, Ashley Cole, was roundly lambasted by observers last night as he was spotted laughing and joking shortly after England's World Cup humiliation at the hands of the Germans. It seems that Ashley Cole is planning...
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Funny story:  Underpant Theft Blamed For England World Cup Debacle

Underpant Theft Blamed For England World Cup Debacle

Sources revealed last night that the real reason for England's disastrous showing at the World Cup in South Africa was not tiredness, as reported, but in fact was solely down to a spate of underpant theft from the team's hotel. Five thieving basta...
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Funny story:  Simon Cowell searches for Alien talent

Simon Cowell searches for Alien talent

Simon Cowell Has admitted that after his succesfull shows in every country on earth such as "x factor", "Britain's got tallent" "American Idol", "Russian rave" "Eskimo entertainer" and "Cambodian crooner" new talent on Earth is rarer than oil and by...
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Funny story:  Nude Internet Photos of Vanessa Hudgens Are Really of Her

Nude Internet Photos of Vanessa Hudgens Are Really of Her

CLEVELAND - Vanessa Hudgens was in town with her aunt Arugula Hudgens visiting the world famous Iron Ore Barge Museum and Souvenir Shop. She was asked how things between her and Zac Efron were going. She blushed and said that every time she thinks...
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Funny story:  The BET Awards: Chris Brown, Kanye West, And Prince - The Yo Bro's Do The Do

The BET Awards: Chris Brown, Kanye West, And Prince - The Yo Bro's Do The Do

LOS ANGELES - The BET Awards (Black Entertainment Television) were held in L.A.'s Aunt Jemima Commemorative Auditorium, which has recently been remodeled to include a special 'Big Assed' section for plus plus size gals such as Aretha Franklin, Oprah...
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Funny story:  It Is Now Official: Jesse James Is No Longer Mr. Sandra Bullock

It Is Now Official: Jesse James Is No Longer Mr. Sandra Bullock

AUSTIN - Sandra Bullock filed for a divorce from her husband, aka Jesse "The Shithead" James back in April and it is now official. Sandra said that "Old Ass-Wipe" is no longer Mr. Sandra Bullock, and she said that he can now go back to being Jesse...
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