Funny story:  "The Internet is over" Says Prince, as millions read about it online

"The Internet is over" Says Prince, as millions read about it online

Pop superstar Prince has vowed to keep his music offline, publicly announcing "the internet is over". Prince has been quoted as saying "They just fill up your head with numbers, it can't be good for you". He compared the internet's popularity wit...
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Funny story:  Paul Hogan and Linda Kozlowski To Star In "Crocodile Dundee Vs. The Vienna Vagina Vampires"

Paul Hogan and Linda Kozlowski To Star In "Crocodile Dundee Vs. The Vienna Vagina Vampires"

SANTA BARBARA, California - Paul Hogan and his wife Linda Kozlowski have just announced that they will be starring in the the fifth installment of the Crocodile Dundee series. Mr. and Mrs. Hogan will soon fly to Budapest, Hungary where they will f...
View 'Paul Hogan and Linda Kozlowski To Star In "Crocodile Dundee Vs. The Vienna Vagina Vampires"'
Funny story:  Simon Cowell Calls Cheryl Cole a "Witch" and Loses Rag With Ex-Lover Sinitta

Simon Cowell Calls Cheryl Cole a "Witch" and Loses Rag With Ex-Lover Sinitta

An X-Factor source has claimed that wierd smug square-headed svengali and purveyor of idiot-entrancing soporific pap Simon Cowell called fellow X-Factor judge Cheryl Cole a witch at the recent auditions for the moronic, exploitative, cynical exercise...
View 'Simon Cowell Calls Cheryl Cole a "Witch" and Loses Rag With Ex-Lover Sinitta'
Funny story:  7000 U.S. Marines to boost Sex Tourism in Costa Rica

7000 U.S. Marines to boost Sex Tourism in Costa Rica

According to the July 5, 2010 Tico Times, "Costa Rica has granted the U.S. military a six-month window to bring 7,000 Marines, five planes and 46 warships into its territory". The 31-8 vote of the Legislative Assembly was presumably "to help stem...
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Funny story:  Vikings were the first people on the moon

Vikings were the first people on the moon

Remember when Peggy Hill told Dale Gribble that Vikings were the first people on the moon and she thought she was making it up? Well guess what, it is the truth all along. A new recent study finds that the Vikings had advanced technology they kept...
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Funny story:  The Story Of Sidney Stollet

The Story Of Sidney Stollet

Sidney Stollet worked as a Clerk for an engineering company. He had dreamed of the day he could retire, and leave this drudgery behind him. After 43 years, and ten days, that day had finally arrived. Sidney recieved his Gold watch and chain, his carriage clock and several small gifts from his colleagues. But, more importantly, Sidney's cheque for £80,000 from the Managing Director, Mr Boggins.
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Funny story:  Upskirt Photograph Of Kirstie Alley Kills Cameraman!

Upskirt Photograph Of Kirstie Alley Kills Cameraman!

Willie Jenkins, a cameraman who has worked for several tabloids as a free agent and had moved to a permanent spot on the National Pisser, has lain in wait in a cellar under a popular package store for two weeks waiting to catch any stars coming out c...
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Funny story:  Michael Jackson Had Chemical Castration!

Michael Jackson Had Chemical Castration!

In a lawsuit brought by Joe Jackson, Michael Jackson's father, Joe Jackson charges that what Dr. Conrad Murray is guilty of is a wrongful death suit and Jackson has taken it to court. An attorney for the doctor, Anthony Sitts, says that the doctor...
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Funny story:  BP to fund Tony Blair's nomination in the US Presidential election race

BP to fund Tony Blair's nomination in the US Presidential election race

BPs Oil Slick HQ, United States: BP, known as 'British Petroleum' by President Obama, have decided to fund Tony Blair's Republican nomination at the next US elections. BP who have had to 'bite the bullet' in the last few weeks, as President Obama...
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Funny story:  Tony Blair to become a Republican Candidate, to challenge President Obama at the next Presidential election.

Tony Blair to become a Republican Candidate, to challenge President Obama at the next Presidential election.

Washington, USA: Tony Blair, having been garlanded: in January 2009 with the "Presidential Medal of Freedom" by George W Bush, in recognition of the "exemplary achievement" that included his support for the "War on Terror", has now receieved another...
View 'Tony Blair to become a Republican Candidate, to challenge President Obama at the next Presidential election.'
Funny story:  Queen Elizabeth to Preside Over Hot Dog Eating Re-Match in New York

Queen Elizabeth to Preside Over Hot Dog Eating Re-Match in New York

England's Queen Elizabeth is planning a quick trip to New York City Tuesday and expects a full schedule of appearances. Among the stops on her itinerary is a visit to Coney Island where she'll officiate over a re-match of the Nathan's Famous Hot Dog...
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Funny story:  Susan Boyle donated egg for Cristiano Ronaldo Jr surrogacy!

Susan Boyle donated egg for Cristiano Ronaldo Jr surrogacy!

London - (Reuterus & Sunny Side Up News): The ID of the mystery woman behind little Cristiano Ronaldo Jr's conception has been revealed. Global crooning sensation Susan Boyle apparently had one of her last remaining double yolkers eggstracted...
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Funny story:  Tar and Sand Candle Business Takes Off in Florida

Tar and Sand Candle Business Takes Off in Florida

Not everyone on the Gulf Coast of Florida is bemoaning the dastardly effects of tar balls washing up on their pristine white-sand beaches. Harold "Happy" Toner and his wife Sunny Toner are turning those tar balls into dollar bills. "Oh, we're hipp...
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Funny story:  The 'Holy Grail' discovered in English field

The 'Holy Grail' discovered in English field

Archaeologists in England are still celebrating the discovery, a year ago to the day, of the largest hoard of Anglo-Saxon artefacts ever discovered and yet we are privileged to be able to announce a find earlier today that will make this and other ar...
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Funny story:  Woman has Vuvuzela removed from her vagina

Woman has Vuvuzela removed from her vagina

A 24 year old woman from East London was taken to hospital on Friday evening to have a vuvuzela removed from her vagina. The vuvuzela became stuck in her vagina after she had watched the World Cup quarter final between Ghana and Uruguay but the wo...
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Funny story:  The Tories (and the LibDems) will never learn

The Tories (and the LibDems) will never learn

It has been a hectic afternoon for the ConDemned coalition. First the Deputy Prime Minister, then the Secretary of State for Education were dragged through the House of Commons by the opposition. An opposition, in Nick Clegg's case that included many...
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Funny story:  Vatican to Release Scores of Soft Porn Tapes to Raise Money for Legal Defense

Vatican to Release Scores of Soft Porn Tapes to Raise Money for Legal Defense

Running low on cash and unable to count on their worshippers for much longer to keep the coffers full so they can hire the best legal minds in the world to defend the growing sex abuse claims, the Vatican has agreed to allow the release of hundreds o...
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Funny story:  Me not culpa says Rooney

Me not culpa says Rooney

Leon Panetta, head of the CIA has rebuked the England footie fans' who have suggested that his agents sabotaged Wayne Rooney during the Germany vs England African World Cup clash. 'Yet another conspiracy theory', he said. This is one theory that i...
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Funny story:  Al Gore Became Environmentalist to Score Women

Al Gore Became Environmentalist to Score Women

(Chicago, IL)Today, Al Gore admitted to Oprah Winfery that he became an environmentalist to score more women. "Women environmentalist are very passionate not only about the environment, but they are passionate about pleasing Al in bed." Al Gore t...
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Funny story:  Major European countries refuse to refuel Iranian planes, so what? Passengers are being flown home on Iranian Flying Carpets!

Major European countries refuse to refuel Iranian planes, so what? Passengers are being flown home on Iranian Flying Carpets!

Iranian planes are being refused fuel in many major European countries as part of a general boycott against all things Iranian including the Burka. Because of the boycott many Iranian planes have become stranded at European airports and Airport tr...
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Funny story:  Jedward Album Sales Hit 2m

Jedward Album Sales Hit 2m

Jedward's record label Universal have revealed today that the duo have sold more than 2 million copies of their debut album 'Together', in just 2 weeks. John and Edward Grimes, who hit fame and fortune on the british talent show The X Factor back...
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Funny story:  Cher found mealted after Malibu heatwave

Cher found mealted after Malibu heatwave

Singing superstar Cher was found melted to the sidewalk in her home town of Malibu yesterday, it has been confirmed. The singer, (64), was said to be in a critical condition when she was found by a member of the public. Peter Armon, who was mindin...
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Funny story:  Wait Wait Wait

Wait Wait Wait

With less than a week to go, four and a bit days to be slightly more accurate, the wait may soon be over for local man Seaton Carew. With the day of reckoning due to take place this coming Friday, Carew should have to wait no longer to learn his fate, but since his change of mind recently things have been slightly clouded. The two who saw at the time of the event no longer have to wait to a...
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Funny story:  Electric Car Owners Given Police Protection During High Oil Price Protests

Electric Car Owners Given Police Protection During High Oil Price Protests

The general strike or bandh called by various Indian opposition parties against the rise in the price of oil, were mostly peaceful in the metros of Bangalore, Mumbai and Delhi despite apprehensions that there would be violence against minorities.
View 'Electric Car Owners Given Police Protection During High Oil Price Protests'
Funny story:  Pope's UK Holiday To Cost Taxpayer £23million

Pope's UK Holiday To Cost Taxpayer £23million

A fierce row has broken out over the Pope's planned UK vacation later this year. It has emerged that the taxpayer is likely to foot the bill for the Papal holiday to the tune of £23 million pounds. REACTION Thomson Holidays spokesman David T...
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Funny story:  Government to Leave 600,000 Jobs on Train

Government to Leave 600,000 Jobs on Train

THE newly-established Office for Budget Responsibility (OBR) says the British public sector is likely to lose around 600,000 jobs by 2014. It is understood that Government ministers will probably leave most of the jobs on trains and in the backs o...
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Funny story:  Apple Launches Invisible iPhone

Apple Launches Invisible iPhone

MASTER of the Universe, Steve Jobs, last night launched a new invisible version of his firm's best-selling iPhone. The new offering from Apple bristles with features that only really cool, brainy people are able to use and which has been made so s...
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Funny story:  Pay as you go - motorists in Britain will plan routes carefully

Pay as you go - motorists in Britain will plan routes carefully

There'll be no more 'nipping down the road in the car to pick up fish 'n' chips, if Britain adopts 'Pay as you go'. It is in the planning stages that British drivers will soon have to pay per mile travelled. Crazy though it may sound it has a lot of benefits: People will walk more and so get much needed exercise. Petrol bills will go down (BUT this COULD have an adverse effect by driving...
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Funny story:  Tough times lead to hair-cuts

Tough times lead to hair-cuts

Barbers throughout Britain are preparing for legislation making all cuts between 25 and 40%.* In a tough crackdown, all beards and wigs will go.* These restrictions are set to save the British economy which has come within a hair's breadth of doub...
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Funny story:  Environmental disaster specialists BP prove that he who laughs last laughs longest!

Environmental disaster specialists BP prove that he who laughs last laughs longest!

Creating massive environmental disasters obviously is a lucrative business and BP are certainly proving that. Their share prices have risen and middle East investors just can't wait to buy a piece of BP's "oily cake"! While the world has been t...
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Funny story:  Russel Brand Sleeps With Russian Super-Spy, Anna Chapman - What Will Katy Perry Say?

Russel Brand Sleeps With Russian Super-Spy, Anna Chapman - What Will Katy Perry Say?

Well, well, well, Katy Perry will not be pleased. Russel Brand, famed for his sexual activities, has been caught up in allegations (which I've totally fabricated of course) of being seen taking an afternoon nap with Anna Chapman, the Russian recently...
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Funny story:  Uruguay Out To Make A Killing Against Holland

Uruguay Out To Make A Killing Against Holland

Uruguay football coach Oscar Tabarez has drawn up a cunning plan to stop Holland forward Arjen Robben in their World Cup semi-final in Cape Town on Tuesday. According to my interpretation of what he was saying, he actually plans to kill him. In...
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Funny story:  World Cup drama: drinks spiked

World Cup drama: drinks spiked

News just in, the German football team have been disqualified from the semi finals of the FIFA World Cup because one of their players has infiltrated the Spanish football team's hotel and spiked their hydration drinks. Klaus Waffermeur, a reserve...
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Funny story:  Marie Osmond In Psycho Ward!

Marie Osmond In Psycho Ward!

It's apparently true. Marie Osmond has been sent to a psycho ward in order to try to get her son's suicide off her mind. Although a publicist for the family says that Marie could not sleep with only 25 sleeping pills and that that had caused the m...
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Funny story:  Fabio Capello's new book: "Tommy Cooper's training manual for World Cup Glory!"

Fabio Capello's new book: "Tommy Cooper's training manual for World Cup Glory!"

Waterstones Book Store, Wembley: As ever, Fabio Capello was cracking jokes in good old Tommy Cooper style as he pointed to the picture of the front of 'Tommy Cooper's World Cup Glory' Manual, a must read for all new aspiring international Football M...
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Funny story:  Justin Bieber's Career May Be Over

Justin Bieber's Career May Be Over

At sixteen and on top of the pop charts, you would think that Justin Bieber would be all set to begin a great tour. But a strange thing has happened to the youngster. Bieber's voice, so high that many have accused him of being a girl, has lower...
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Funny story:  7/7 cops 'want a little chat' with Putin's pneumatic bombshell Anna Chapman

7/7 cops 'want a little chat' with Putin's pneumatic bombshell Anna Chapman

London - (Semtex News): A single strand of glinting coppery hair found inside an unexploded Al Qaeda toasted sarnie on 7 July 2005 has sparked panic. And prompted an immediate review of all UK anti-terror intelligence: Is KGB spook Anna Chapma...
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Funny story:  Tom Jones dropped by Record Label

Tom Jones dropped by Record Label

News in this morning suggests that singing super-star, Tom Jones has been dropped by his record label. Ageing Jones (now 70), moved to Island records last year for a reputed £1.5 million and was expected to produce more of the trade-mark material...
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Funny story:  Kate Gosselin Sends the Kids to Kiddie Boot Camp

Kate Gosselin Sends the Kids to Kiddie Boot Camp

An upcoming episode of Kate Plus Eight, has Kate Gosselin talking to a rough and ready Marine drill sergeant who runs a high-octane, no-nonsense summer "boot" camp program for children called Kiddie Boot Camp. This is one show you don't want to miss.
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Funny story:  Isle of Wight News - Council blamed over road-signs

Isle of Wight News - Council blamed over road-signs

Councillors for the Isle of Wight are up in arms with the Highways Agency. A new road sign has been erected on Forest Road heading towards Somerton (pictured), which plainly states "Isle of White". "We are not amused," said Ophelia Keyhole, 39, wife of Jeremiah Keyhole, leader of the Isle of Wight Chamber of Commerce. "The Isle of Wight has been called this for centuries, how can the highway...
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Funny story:  NHS rapped over Scaremongering Obesity Letters

NHS rapped over Scaremongering Obesity Letters

The NHS has been accused of trying to 'scare people well' by Health Minister, Simon Burns. Primary Care Trusts have been sending out letters to schoolchildren as little as an ounce over their ideal weight, telling them that they are obese and will...
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Funny story:  Jedward Star, Edward Grimes, Survives Assassination Attempt

Jedward Star, Edward Grimes, Survives Assassination Attempt

Jedward star and unlikely pop-idol, Edward Grimes, was rushed to hospital yesterday after collapsing on stage. The 18 year old performer, who was appearing with his twin-brother John, was seen to stumble and eventually collapse on stage, much to t...
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Funny story:  Cheryl Cole (Oops, I mean Tweedy..) & Justin Bieber In Feud

Cheryl Cole (Oops, I mean Tweedy..) & Justin Bieber In Feud

24 hours ago, I reported news of a romance. However, circumstances have changed, and I am now saddened to reveal that the Tweedy/Bieber romance which we broke the news of has turned sour. Staff at Boujis had informed me that the pair "were smitten...
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Funny story:  Isle of Wight News - Mysterious Arsonist Strikes Again

Isle of Wight News - Mysterious Arsonist Strikes Again

Police are hunting a pair of youths who are believed to be behind a series of arson attacks on dry stone walls around Shorwell. "There are a couple of young lads we'd like to speak to," said police constable Michelle Gonmad. "We have a fair idea who they are, on account of there not being very many youths in the Shorwell area." The border wall for Westcourt Farm, on the road to Limerstone ha...
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Funny story:  BBC Sues ITV and Simon Cowell over Reality TV Show

BBC Sues ITV and Simon Cowell over Reality TV Show

Reports released yesterday announced that Amanda Holden was leaving the 'Britain's Got Talent' team to pursue other projects, one of which is to become a contestant on Simon Cowell's new reality TV Show 'I'm a Celebrity Get me Strictly Come Dancing O...
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Funny story:  Education cuts of One Billion

Education cuts of One Billion

The Con-Dems have announced that the education budget will be cut by over one billion pounds from Labour's original budget. This represents a cut of one quarter, or a week's worth of fighting in Afghanistan. Labour's plan of rebuilding or refurbis...
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Funny story:  William Hague concerned as Tony Blair's bodyguards cost 250,000 pounds in expenses

William Hague concerned as Tony Blair's bodyguards cost 250,000 pounds in expenses

William Hague is indeed concerned at Government spending which it was disclosed that Tony Blair and his family over a year, including officers' wages, are estimated to have cost taxpayers over 6 million pounds. Taxpayers have every right to be up in arms at this ridiculous expenditure. We must face it, British politicians are not in as much danger (assassination-wise) as U.S. politicians. T...
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Funny story:  Isle of Wight News - Traffic Chaos

Isle of Wight News - Traffic Chaos

The main traffic lights on the A3020, St Georges Way in the centre of Newport were out of action for three hours on Monday morning, right in the middle of rush hour. As the traffic lights cycled endlessly between red, amber and green, the local shop owners and residents were out in force to watch them. Such was the ensuing chaos, it took the police nearly forty minutes to get to the scene and s...
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Funny story:  Benefit Claimants New Proposals

Benefit Claimants New Proposals

Requirements for qualification for benefits for the unemployed have been reviewed by Iain Bunkum Smith MP, Minster of Works & Pensions. In a speech in London today Iain Duncan Smith said: "A system that was originally designed to help support the poorest in society is now trapping them in the very condition it was supposed to alleviate. Instead of helping, a deeply unfair benefits system to...
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Funny story:  Man Could See Thai Lady's Vagina

Man Could See Thai Lady's Vagina

A teacher at a school in Bangkok has told friends about a lunchtime experience that he will never forget, after he was able to peruse the contents of a woman's knickers whilst he tucked into a Thai Green Curry. The teacher, Moys Kenwood, laughed a...
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Funny story:  Raoul Thomas Moat - Gateshead Gunman Still On The Loose

Raoul Thomas Moat - Gateshead Gunman Still On The Loose

Ex-convict Raoul Thomas Moat, who is wanted by the police for shooting one man dead, seriously wounding his former partner, and later shooting a police officer in an unprovoked attack, is still on the loose. Police suspect that the crazed gunman i...
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Funny story:  Colombian Reality TV Show "Make it From Cocaine" Spawns Real Life Replicas

Colombian Reality TV Show "Make it From Cocaine" Spawns Real Life Replicas

BOGOTA, Colombia - Taking its cue from American and British reality television shows, Colombia's first ever reality show, "Make it From Cocaine" is a complete and utter failure. Columbian authorities were skeptical at first to even allow the airi...
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Funny story:  English Police Arrest 173 Photographers at Alex Reid's and Katie Price's Wedding Reception

English Police Arrest 173 Photographers at Alex Reid's and Katie Price's Wedding Reception

SURREY, England - Police reported that they had to arrest 173 English photographers who refused to listen to the police instructions that they had been given at the Reid-Price Wedding Reception. The ceremonies took place in The St. Sir Paul McCart...
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Funny story:  By the Grace of Kim: Kim Kardashian Promises to "Kiss" Members of the Seattle Storm, Guaranteeing Them WNBA Championship.

By the Grace of Kim: Kim Kardashian Promises to "Kiss" Members of the Seattle Storm, Guaranteeing Them WNBA Championship.

Kim Kardashian, Goodwill Ambassador for the Benign Solitary Fibrous Buttock Tumor Foundation, has finally announced what team will next benefit from her Beautiful Tight Wet Lips: The Seattle Sonic Storm. Kardashian spoke to reporters while promoti...
View 'By the Grace of Kim: Kim Kardashian Promises to "Kiss" Members of the Seattle Storm, Guaranteeing Them WNBA Championship.'
Funny story:  Cheryl Cole In Emotional Sick Bed Plea

Cheryl Cole In Emotional Sick Bed Plea

Following her dramatic collapse at a North London photo shoot yesterday, Cheryl Cole convened a press conference in her palatial bedroom and addressed the media as she lay gently reclining in her sick bed. As an aura of hushed reverence enveloped...
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Funny story:  Cheryl Cole In Collapse Drama

Cheryl Cole In Collapse Drama

It appears that overwork is taking its toll on X-Factor judge and singing sensation, Cheryl Cole. Onlookers looked on in horror yesterday as Cheryl collapsed at a North London photoshoot for her new album. Friends had expressed concerns that she h...
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Funny story:  Apple to Sue iCarly! Says Jobs: "I Trademarked The Name When I Bought Carly Simon's Soul"

Apple to Sue iCarly! Says Jobs: "I Trademarked The Name When I Bought Carly Simon's Soul"

Apple Head Organ Recipient, Steve Jobs, says that he'll be suing Nickelodeon and the Cast and crew of the Nick show "iCarly", stating that he's owned the "iCarly" name since be bought Carly Simon's soul in 1978. "Carly wanted to get an ad endorsem...
View 'Apple to Sue iCarly! Says Jobs: "I Trademarked The Name When I Bought Carly Simon's Soul"'
Funny story:  July 5th Indian General Strike to be Held in Shifts at ITES Hubs of Bangalore, NCR, Mumbai

July 5th Indian General Strike to be Held in Shifts at ITES Hubs of Bangalore, NCR, Mumbai

The 6:00 am to 6:00 pm Bandh called by various opposition parties is hopelessly insufficient to stop businesses from functioning normally according to various protest groups and individuals. Former union leader going by the name of AVX Shenoy note...
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Funny story:  Maradona Refuses To Apologise To Pele

Maradona Refuses To Apologise To Pele

Diego Maradona arrived back in Buenos Aries with his defeated and deflated Argentinian World Cup squad yesterday, and promptly refused to apologise for a remark he made in South Africa suggesting that Pele belonged in a museum. Insiders say that B...
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Funny story:  Elvis Presley is still alive

Elvis Presley is still alive

You heard the stories before but it is really true, Elvis Presley faked his death so that he could work for the CIA as a secret agent, for the purpose of spying on The Soviet Union. Elvis Presley shaved his head and wore a wig resembling the Colonial era, so that he could visit the Soviet Union as a historical re-en-actor. Whenever Elvis visited the Soviet Union, he secretly located nuclear...
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Funny story:  World Cup Cheating Scandal

World Cup Cheating Scandal

The honour of the world cup in South Africa was under threat last night, amid allegations that the whole competition has been fixed so that the best two teams will eventually meet each other in the Final. It's even been claimed that the eventual w...
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Funny story:  No News Worth Telling You About

No News Worth Telling You About

It's happened before, and more often than you think, and yesterday was just another one of those occasions when absolutely nothing on Earth happened worth reporting as actual news. Several things happened, of course, but they were really the ever...
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Funny story:  Neighborhood BBQ Turns Into Roman Shower

Neighborhood BBQ Turns Into Roman Shower

This weekend, while most people are asking themselves, "Will Lebron James stay in Cleveland?" James Brubaker should have been asking himself and anyone with some compassion, "Do you think these burgers are done?" After taking advantage of the Firs...
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