Funny story:  British Change Spotted Dick To Speckled Trouser Trout To Avoid Embarrassing Customers

British Change Spotted Dick To Speckled Trouser Trout To Avoid Embarrassing Customers

A council has taken Spotted Dick off the menu at its staff canteen because of comments from sniggering diners. Cockshare County Council's dining room now serves Speckled Trouser Trout instead. It reportedly banned 'Spotted Dick' because of the nam...
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Funny story:  Amy Winehouse: No, My Leg Won't Be Amputated!

Amy Winehouse: No, My Leg Won't Be Amputated!

Singer Amy Winehouse has displayed displeasure over a leading fan 'zine speculating that her left leg may have to be amputated after some photos were released earlier this summer which showed a lot of scaring to the leg. Winehouse allegedly told t...
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Funny story:  Jack - It's Where You Wanna Be

Jack - It's Where You Wanna Be

Once again, Jack is the name that everybody wants, according to the Times of London. Jack is the most popular name, and has been for the last 13 years. For boys. Calling girls 'Jack' is likely to lead to ridicule, and not regarded as a good mov...
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Funny story:  America's Got Talent's Barbara Padilla Knocks Everyone's Socks Off!

America's Got Talent's Barbara Padilla Knocks Everyone's Socks Off!

HOLLYWOOD - The entire America's Got Talent audience as well as all three AGT judges gave Houston opera singer Barbara Padilla a standing ovation. And that standing O from the judges is extremely rare especially considering the fact that British...
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Funny story:  Editorial: "I don't work 12 hours a day to come home and piss in the toilet"

Editorial: "I don't work 12 hours a day to come home and piss in the toilet"

Let me start by clearing the air. Unequivocally, I love my wife. I honestly do. I've never so much as looked at another woman, let alone lay my hands on one and break the sanctity of our wedding vows. Nor do my feelings on the present issue color any other feelings I have for her; we try to make every day a fresh opportunity to show our love and share the best and worst that life has to offer.
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Funny story:  DeLay Trying to Delay DWTS Debut

DeLay Trying to Delay DWTS Debut

Former US House Majority Leader Tom DeLay apparently is having second thoughts about his participation as a contestant in the upcoming 9th season of ABC's hit ballroom dance reality show, "Dancing With The Stars." DeLay, whose professional partn...
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Funny story:  Feeding campaign for models underway for upcoming New York fashion week

Feeding campaign for models underway for upcoming New York fashion week

New York, NY - Plans are underway to provide sustenance for models to combat the hectic demands of Fashion Week, slated for September 10 - 17. Designers will place inverted-style hummingbird feeders backstage of the runway shows, where models can gat...
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Funny story:  Ratzinger whore to pay the price of 9/9/9 hoax

Ratzinger whore to pay the price of 9/9/9 hoax

London - (Doomsday Mess): Police are pissing themselves with glee after discovering that a 'rogue meteorite' will smite the Queen on 9/11 this year, and are doing absolutely nothing to stop it. Orders received from the secret World Government have...
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Funny story:  Brainless Morons Divorce

Brainless Morons Divorce

The three-year marriage of Vacuous Tart Jordan and pointless twat Peter Andre was brought to an end in little more than a minute today when the insipid celebrity couple were granted a "quickie divorce". The divorce proceedings lasted considerably...
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Funny story:  National Breast Appreciation Day - Merkel Peed Off As Germany Is Excluded

National Breast Appreciation Day - Merkel Peed Off As Germany Is Excluded

German Chancellor Angela Merkel was reportedly furious today at the exclusion of her native country from National Breast Appreciation day on September 28th. Merkel, by her own admission, no oil painting, stuck up for her fellow countrywomen, stati...
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Funny story:  The Sun Has A Baby

The Sun Has A Baby

Shockwaves crashed throughout the scientific world today after NASA reported the discovery of a baby sun hiding behind our own Sun. "We have long suspected something was behind the sun but never had the necessary equipment to locate it until now."...
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Funny story:  Husband of Woman with World's Largest Vagina 'Ready' for National Breast Appreciation Day

Husband of Woman with World's Largest Vagina 'Ready' for National Breast Appreciation Day

OSHKOSH, B'Gosh - This morning on Wake the Hell Up America, Johnson Octopops let loose about his bitter break-up with the woman with the world's largest vagina, who he said, "would only beat me off... and smelled like fish." The television "person...
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Funny story:  T-Bagers Birthers join forces... renamed Douche-Bagers

T-Bagers Birthers join forces... renamed Douche-Bagers

In a move to solidify the fringe elements of the conservative movement and the Republican Party, spokesmen for the T-Baggers and The Berther have announced a joint effort to combine their ranks and rants against the Obama administration. The annou...
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Funny story:  Father, Daughter Win Explosive Diarrhea Contests

Father, Daughter Win Explosive Diarrhea Contests

Blackwater Mountain, Tennessee - When it come to having explosive diarrhea, John J. Johnson, JJ to his friends, and daughter Jean J. Johnson are quite a team. John set a new distance record and Jean won first place at the Corn Hole & Washer Pitch...
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Funny story:  Man with World's 2nd Largest Penis Recovering from "Joint Reduction Surgery."

Man with World's 2nd Largest Penis Recovering from "Joint Reduction Surgery."

Long Branch, NJ/ Hospital News - A man, far from a " normal" man, is resting comfortably today before commencing rehabilitation exercises after having the world's first "Penis Reduction" performed by noted plastic surgeon Alex "Tight Jaws" Johnson.
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Funny story:  Venus Williams Makes a Woman of Caster Semenya

Venus Williams Makes a Woman of Caster Semenya

In a surprise development, tennis star Venus Williams announced her engagement to embattled South African runner Caster Semenya. Caster, who has endured numerous questions about her gender, eagerly showed off the 5 carat engagement ring at a press co...
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Funny story:  Schwarzenegger Challenges Mother Nature To A Fight

Schwarzenegger Challenges Mother Nature To A Fight

Sacramento, CA - California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger has had enough. "Wildfires, earthquakes, drought, floods, swine flu, Michael Jackson - no more! Mother Nature must be terminated." Schwarzenegger's remarks come as the state recovers fro...
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Funny story:  Charles Gibson To Leave ABC News After Third Close Call By Lightning

Charles Gibson To Leave ABC News After Third Close Call By Lightning

News achorman Charles Gibson has decided to leave his post in the near future and pass the baton to Diane Sawyer. "I'm not sure about the exact date", stated Gibson. "I do know it's sometimes after National Breast Appreciation Day on the 28th as...
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Funny story:  Veep in kidnap drama

Veep in kidnap drama

New York, Wednesday. In astounding news that nobody could fathom except Gordon Brown, Police announced that US Vice President, Joe Biden, has been kidnapped by a renegade group of Wall Street accountants. These corporate criminals have asked for...
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Funny story:  Dolly Parton Celebrates Breast Appreciation Day

Dolly Parton Celebrates Breast Appreciation Day

"It's about time we had a National Breast Appreciation Day" Dolly Parton reportedly stated at Dollywood this morning on PMSNBC. "If there's anybody any more thankful than I am, they're a complete Boob!" "These babies have carried me more tha...
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Funny story:  09:09 09/09/09 coincidence

09:09 09/09/09 coincidence

Today, numerologists will have noticed that the time and date at one point was 09:09 09/09/09. After an appeal for people affected by this, we received details from a Mr Neil McBride from Dunfermline near Edinburgh in Scotland. He told us he had be...
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Funny story:  Bank Calls Obama's Home Loan Due to Real Estate Crisis: Frank and Fannie Friends Ride to Rescue..Again!

Bank Calls Obama's Home Loan Due to Real Estate Crisis: Frank and Fannie Friends Ride to Rescue..Again!

Chicago,Il/ Real Estate Hard Times - According to Representatives from the Icelandic national bank, the value of President Obama's personal residence in now officially 'underwater', and they are calling the loan. Obama purchased the Georgian Styl...
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Funny story:  New Brown Bounce for Labour

New Brown Bounce for Labour

The Labour Voters Association today praised the prime minister's initiative to offer incentives to shore up the faltering Labour vote with his proposed New Voter Deal. A statement issued from the Association read.. "Even with the extraordinary run of...
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Funny story:  Adam Lambert To Become Third BeeGee?

Adam Lambert To Become Third BeeGee?

Are the Bee Gees getting back together? According to all the news reports in the headlines yesterday, they certainly are. What they didn't report was that American Idol singer Adam Lambert may become the third member. "With Adam wearing theis s...
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Funny story:  Janet Jackson To Honor Her Pussy At VMA's

Janet Jackson To Honor Her Pussy At VMA's

New York, New York - From the loft of her 'on again, off again' lover, aging thespian Robert Deniro, Janet Jackson, the singer who caused such an uproar with her wardrobe malfunction at the Super Bowl on February 1, 2004, has announced that she will...
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Funny story:  Burying Michael Jackson, Other Boomers, Big Business

Burying Michael Jackson, Other Boomers, Big Business

After being laid off from his previous three jobs over the past three years, Donald Phelps of Cloverport, Wisconsin says he has finally found a 'layoff proof' profession...the funeral sciences. "There are so many boomers out there in their 60's n...
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Funny story:  Sarah and Todd have Bed-in at Wasilla Hotel

Sarah and Todd have Bed-in at Wasilla Hotel

Propped up on pillows in a sea of white linens on a California King in the Mud Flat Suite of the a Wasilla hotel, Todd and Sarah Palin spoke to reporters in a press conference this morning. "We're holding a 'bed-in'", Mrs. Palin said, elbowing T...
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Funny story:  Madonna Still Breast-feeding Her Kids

Madonna Still Breast-feeding Her Kids

Jerusalem, Israel-- Madonna verified last night that she is still breast-feeding her kids, and that she never plans to stop. Lordy, 12, and Rockhead, 6, are breast fed twice a day. Neither child has ever eaten solid food. "It's the most natural...
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Funny story:  China Criticizes FED: US Now Printing More $100 Bills than North Korea!

China Criticizes FED: US Now Printing More $100 Bills than North Korea!

Beijing, China/ International Fiduciary News - China's International Finance Minister, Hu Nhu, sounded a serious financial alarm today with the news that for the first time in 3 decades, the US Treasury Department was printing more $100 Bills than Ro...
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Funny story:  Conservatives implement Nazi evil twin plan for votes

Conservatives implement Nazi evil twin plan for votes

The conservatives today have unveiled plans which they hope will win them the next election. In a bid to run the next government, David Cameron has cloned himself an evil twin. The twins will live and also debate together jointly in Prime Minis...
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Funny story:  Andy Murray blames Andy Murray for defeat

Andy Murray blames Andy Murray for defeat

Andy Murray was annihilated by Marin Cilic yesterday in the last 16 of the US Open. During the press conference Murray was very honest about who he blamed for the defeat. "I blame Andy Murray, he's a fuck*ng prick, he kept on putting me off, he di...
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Funny story:  Rooney: Tom Daley is my footballing hero

Rooney: Tom Daley is my footballing hero

Wayne Rooney, ugly, revealed in a one on one interview with lard-arse Martin Samuel, that sexy diver Tom Daley is his footballing hero, in the early hours of Monday Morning. "I just love the way he dives... it's an inspiration to any footballer"...
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Funny story:  Declaration of Guilt

Declaration of Guilt

Time is 1978. A member of a clandestine organization, addressing a representative of a unique species of Homo sapiens, said, "O.K. Before we let you replace your archenemy, we need some assurance." The rep replied, "Your honor, what assurances? We have been your humble servant for the past 100 years. You know we can wrap the mob round our little finger. You know they absolutely bow to our orders."...
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Funny story:  Grandma Lee, 75,  Agrees To Be Adam Lambert's Opening Act

Grandma Lee, 75, Agrees To Be Adam Lambert's Opening Act

SAN DIEGO - Adam Lambert has confirmed that America's Got Talent's comedian Grandma Lee has in fact been signed to be the opening act in his upcoming 'Lambert Loose on The Land of Music Tour.' The 75-year-old Jacksonville granny makes no secret ab...
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Funny story:  Caster Tired of The Damn Gender Questions

Caster Tired of The Damn Gender Questions

NEW YORK CITY - South Africa's Caster Semenya, the world's 800 meter champion held a press conference in Yankee Stadium and told the assembled reporters that she is sick and tired of all the questions questioning her gender. Semenya wearing skinti...
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Funny story:  Trans Via Venezuela Airlines Worried Like Hell About Swine Flu

Trans Via Venezuela Airlines Worried Like Hell About Swine Flu

CARACAS - The CEO of Trans Via Venezuela Airlines, one of the largest airlines in South America, Don Diego Corona-Cienfuegos has stated in an email to his sister, Chalupita Corona-Cienfuegos Schwartz that his director of ticket stamping has informed...
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Funny story:  Chelsea Sack Fans in Shock Move

Chelsea Sack Fans in Shock Move

Celebrity fans such as Boris Johnson and Johnny Vaughan are amongst those left without a club following Chelsea FC's shock announcement that they are sacking their supporters. The move has surprised many, but pundit Alan Hansen sees the logic behind...
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Funny story:  Octomom hates Susan Boyle

Octomom hates Susan Boyle

'America was talking about ME before that witch came along', cried Octomom. I was interviewing her for another video when she asked her if she was a Susan Boyle fan. Susan's CD 'I Screamed A Scream' had just been released and one of her neighbor...
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