Spoof news stories from June 2009
There were 1,174 spoof news stories published in June 2009. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.
Michael Jackson Fakes Death, Goes Into Hiding
LOS ANGELES, CA - Michael Jackson, reported to have died earlier today, actually faked his own death in an elaborate hoax to escape the media, says a source who asked to remain anonymous for her own protection.
She claims the body found by paramed...
Lisa Marie Presley Reveals Intimate Secrets About Michael Jackson
MALIBU BEACH - Lisa Marie Presley, daughter of the King of Rock and Roll Elvis Presley was married for two years to the King of Pop Michael Jackson.
They were married in 1994, before a group of 100 family members and close friends. The wedding was...
Michael Jackson Leaves Everything To Macaulay Culkin
HOLLYWOOD - Michael Jackson's lawyer Erasmus Rainmaster has said that Mr. Jackson left everything to his long time friend and Neverland pal Macaulay Culkin.
The 28-year-old Culkin who starred in the 1990 blockbuster movie Home Alone was vacationin...
Cher's Daughter Chastity Bono To Get A Penis
WEST HOLLYWOOD - Chastity Bono, the 40-year-old daughter of 70s icons Sonny and Cher has announced that she wants to play on the boy's team.
The daughter of one of the most popular music duos of all-time said that she will have the sexual reassign...
Shocking Conan O'Brian skit features Adam Lambert on The Tonight Show
In an appalling lapse of security at NBC, our source that will remain anonymous inside The Tonight Show, uncovered this inflammatory script from a 'lost' file inside the new office of Conan O'Brian.
The skit heavily features the runner up on FOX'...
Robert Pattison Seen Kissing Kristen's Stunt Double!
Actor Robert Pattinson was caught kissing Kristen Stewart's double in the movies Friday night completely by accident.
The romantic couple, Pattinson and Stewart had been using their stunt doubles from the Twilight movies to sneak away to themselve...
Amanda Holden to host Britain's Got MILF in the nude!
After her success on BGT, Amanda Holden, 43 has proposed the idea to her friend Simon who seemed mildly interested, yet thoroughly opposed to the idea.
Amanda, 40 who is famous for marrying Les Dennis and turning him into a figure that now resemb...
Michael Jackson Autopsy Results Leaked to Press
The preliminary results of the Michael Jackson autopsy were leaked to the press this afternoon in Southern California. The autopsy confirms that the King of Pop suffered a massive coronary and died due to loss of heart function.
The autopsy also...
Kristen Stewart And Robert Pattinson Could Have Died Tonight Says LAPD Spokesman
When we asked the LAPD if there was the remotest possibility that Twilight stars and teen idols Kristen Stewart and Rob Pattininson could have died tonight, we were met with a stony silence.
When we insisted that we just wanted to know if it was a...
Shades of Michael Hutchence in David Carradine closet sex game death?
Bangcock, Thighland - (WTF? Sordid Ass Mess): "He chose to auto-eroticise in a frickin' blacked-out hotel closet? ...Like, that's a secret code-word for 'gay' maybe??...Tied the frickin' ropes round his dick and neck himself? Case closed, no othe...
President Obama Reveals He Voted For Adam Lambert
WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Barack Obama, who has remarked that he watched American Idol along with his wife and daughters Malia and Sasha revealed that he voted for Adam Lambert.
He smiled and stated that his wife planned on voting for Kris Alle...
Michael Jackson NOT DEAD!
There was confusion across the world this morning when, after it had initially been reported that superstar singer Michael Jackson had died after suffering a cardiac arrest at his Los Angeles home, HE APPEARED LIVE ON BBC TV LAST NIGHT!
Jackson ha...
Amanda Holden lingerie pictures story to be retracted
A lawsuit by Amanda Holden and her husband Desmond Tutu against peeping-Tom paparazzo working for the London Daily Soft-porn News has the print and online media scrambling to expunge her images from their pages.
'Actress' Amanda Holden claimed in...
Man with world's largest penis stalked by Vanessa Hudgens
HOLLYWOOD, CA - The man with the world's largest penis, currently on tour to promote his latest CD, a back-to-his-roots, rock-solid musical endeavor titled Gone Straight, revealed today that he has a stalker.
Speaking with a generic, semi-hot, vac...
Grief stricken "Jacko" fans force Martin Bashir "Underground" into a "Bad" situation
London, England - Not since the global hit-man contract placed on the life of Indian-born Salman Rushdie for his book "The Satanic Verses" criticizing the Islamic faith has a Western journalist had to go underground, fearing for his life.
And tha...
Annie Leibovitz to take 'Official' Michael Jackson Autopsy Photos
Los Angeles, CA - Perhaps the most celebrated celebrity photographer of the latter half of the 20th century, Annie Leibovitz has been hired by Joe Jackson to take the 'official' photographs of Michael Jackson's autopsy.
"The point of the exercise,...
Michael Jackson's Body Missing!
Devoted fans reacted with shock today as it was revealed that the body of Michael Jackson has gone missing.
Emotions ranged from utter disbelief to hopeful optimism as the news spread through cyberspace like a grease fire through a Popeye's Chic...
Kate Gosselin of Jon and Kate Plus 8 To Appear Nude in PlayMister
PHILADELPHIA - Kate Gosselin, of the TLC reality show Jon and Kate Plus 8 has just stated that she will be appearing in a nude photo layout in the next issue of PlayMister Magazine.
The 34-year-old statuesque MILF told her best friend from high sc...
"Bikini Girl" Asks Adam Lambert To Marry Her
HOLLYWOOD - Katrina Darrell, aka "Bikini Girl" has admitted that yes, she has in fact asked American Idol winner, ah make that runnerup, Adam Lambert, to marry her.
Kit Kat as her grandmother calls her said that she was sitting at a Chick Fil-A in...
Igor Stravinsky conducts FreeBird on YouTube
To celebrate Igor Stravinsky's birthday, his estate has released a previously unseen film of the renowned Russian composer conducting a performance of FreeBird performed in 1971 by Lynyrd Skynyrd and the Berlin Philharmonic Orchestra.
The film has...
Adam Lambert and the Wholly Gay
INTERIOR ROOM IN CASTLE TOWER - DAY
A young, attractive ADAM LAMBERT is gazing out of a castle window. JOE JERVIS, gay rights activist and blogger, uncuffs Adam's hands and looks out the window too.
JOE JERVIS: One day, Lambert, all this will be yours ...
ADAM LAMBERT: What - the curtains?
JOE JERVIS: Not the curtains, Lambert ... All that ... (indicates the vista from the window) a...
Man With World's Smallest Penis Makes Nude Calender
Penis Minus Wilson (not his real name) who has the world's smallest penis and who has the number one website on the internet because there are so many that are curious or want to feel good about their own manhood, has announced that he will be puttin...
Adam Lambert To Move In With Kate of "Jon and Kate Plus 8"
HOLLYWOOD - Adam Lambert's manager Miffy Tillamuck has issued a media release acknowledging the fact that Jon and Kate Gosselin of the reality show Jon and Kate Plus Eight are getting a divorce.
Ms. Tillamuck has stated that due to the fact that...
French Airbus vanishes over Bermuda Triangle
Rio de Janeiro - (Merde Alors! Mess): An explosive temporal anomaly over the Atlantic's notorious Bermuda Fryangle sector is being swept by emergency Pentagon surveillance satellites following the disappearance of a French passenger jet today.
The...
Bizarre Findings In Michael Jackson Autopsy
Los Angeles CA-- Autopsy results for the late Michael Jackson were conducted early today by the FBI and Los Angeles Police Department. Special Agent Dana Scully-Mulder conducted the autopsy because of some "unusual" marks on the singer's heart. The...
Russell Brand invites Pixie Lott to Summer Solstice shag on Hampstead Heath!
London - (Horny Ass Mess): Lovelorn TV naughty-boy Russell Brand is all set to woo red-hot Number One Top-of-the-Pops sensation Pixie Lott with a romantic dawn tryst on Hampstead Heath this Sunday.
A recent airport encounter with stunning eighteen...
Diana Ross Wants Custody Of Michael Jackson's Pet Chimp Bubbles
NEW YORK CITY - Diana Ross, of the 60s African-American trio known as Diana Ross and The Supremes has begged Macaulay Culkin for custody of Michael Jackson's beloved chimpanzee Bubbles.
Earlier reports stated that Michael Jackson had left everythi...
Michael Jackson 'had a penis'
Only days after the announcement of the King of Pop's death, it has emerged that the singer had what has been described as 'a penis' attached to his body.
The discovery was made during the first initial autopsy yesterday in Los Angeles, California...
Michael Jackson Funeral to Take Place in London for 50 dates
Promoters have announced their intention to hold a special 50-date 'Farewell Tour' in London where fans can come and watch their idol Michael Jackson's funeral.
A spectacular spectacle has been planned with fireworks, smoke machines and all the ot...
Adam Lambert Admits He's Dating A Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader
SAN DIEGO - American Idol's call in vote runnerup, but Electoral College vote winner, Adam Lambert confided to TV personality blogger Perez Hilton that he has in fact been secretly dating a Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader.
The beautiful hazel-eyed blon...
Miley Cyrus Gives Nick Jonas A Lap Dance & Stars In Three New Movies
Disney doll Miley Cyrus, 16, reportedly gave her boyfriend a lap dance - after she was seen drinking champagne and partying at a New York hotspot until 2:45 AM with Nick Jonas and a group of pals.
A source told the New York News: "Miley looked not...
Mark Sanford Mistress Photo Released
Buenos Ares, Argentina - The photo of the mistress of South Carolina Governor, Mark Sanford, was released today by the local Buenos Ares press.
The mistress, Maria Belen Chapur, is believed to be about 43 years-old, although her photograph would l...
Michael Jackson's Ghost interrupts Jarvis Cocker's 'set' at Glastonbury.
In a strange turn of irony, 'Pulp' front man Jarvis Cocker's set was interrupted by the ghost of Michael Jackson moonwalking across the stage - as he sang some dire dirges at Glastonbury today.
Jarvis 18 lbs famously mooned Michael Jackson at the...
Michael Jackson's DNA Says This Is Not Him!
A police coroner shocked everyone this morning when he announced that the body brought in to the hospital was NOT the real Michael Jackson.
Through DNA testing and comparing them with Jackson's DNA fo years ago, someone has been impersonating Jack...
Robert Pattinson's Old Girlfriend Is Attacked
Robert Pattinson's old girlfriend Melissa Huckaby, who sang the song "I'm every woman" by Witney Huston in the Tyra Banks show, is violently attacked in prison by man hungry lesbians.
In a television interview Melisa Huckaby claims she was brutal...
Man With World's Largest Penis Gets Wood
JACKSON, WY - It's been more than two years since the man with the world's largest penis began erecting his new home with his own two bare hands. Near Jackson Hole in Northwest Wyoming, the newly completed house clearly indicates one thing: The man...
Michael Jackson Double, Navi, On Suicide Watch
London, UK - Michael Jackson's double, Navi, the man who is considered to be the No. 1 Jackson impersonator in the world, is on a 'suicide watch' in 'The Priory', a private facility in London made famous when Susan Boyle lost her grip on things.
O...
President Obama Announces Official Michael Jackson Day
WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Barack Obama at a White House press conference has stated that he is issuing a presidential proclamation designating Michael Jackson's birthday, August 29, as National Michael Jackson Day.
The president said that thro...
Susan Boyle, Adam Lambert, & Gilles Marini To Record "The Runnerup Song"
BEVERLY HILLS, California - Simon Cowell, owner of 19th Hole Productions has said that he will be producing a single which will be recorded by the runners up of "Britain's Got Talent," "American Idol," and "Dancing With The Stars."
Cowell said he...
Chastity Bono To Appear Nude In PlayMister Magazine
BEVERLY HILLS - Cher Bono's little daughter, 40-year-old Chastity has agreed to do a "Before and After Layout Spread" in PlayMister Men's Magazine.
PlayMister's editor Terzolino Atwater stated that it will definitely be a first for his magazine wh...
Star Trek Chapter 6: The Trouble With Turse
The Voyage of the Starship Enterprise
Chapter Six: The Trouble With Turse
Stardate 69670.01 (just before lunch).
Captain's log incidental, Captain 'Buck' Kirk reporting.
At 06:52 today one of the Enterprise's escape pods was jettisoned unexpectedly after the ship's control system was overridden. The escape pod's trajectory swiftly took it behind the van Halen belt and therefore out of...
Pattinson And Stewart Work Out Problem Together
After Robert Pattinson was caught in a compromising position with stunt-double Heather O'Brien recently, things almost got out of hand, admit the "Twilight" couple.
"I've talked all this over with Robert and then I had a good talk with Heather and...
Man With World's Largest Penis Goes Into Hiding - Overexposure Blamed
An American man, reportedly the possessor of the world's largest penis went into hiding yesterday evening at 7:32 pm Mountain Time, blaming over exposure for his inability to cope.
The man, allegedly a close acquaintance of legendary Spoof writer...
Preliminary toxicology report details Jackson chemical intake
Los Angeles - (Toxic Ass Mess): Singer Michael Jackson was taking a lethal daily cocktail of dozens of meds both orally, intravenously and via the French nation's preferred route.
LAPD pathology sources have found a substantial build-up of the pai...
Pattinson, Stewart And Stunt Doubles Having Fun
It's always fun to get your own back after being hunted all the time by the paparazzi and Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are driving the reporters nuts. Furthermore, several other stars are keeping an eye on the situation to see what they can d...
Twilight New Moon Actor Ask "What's Going On?"
"What in blazes is going on with the movie?"
That's what Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart and several actors in the movie want to know.
Is it snake bit or wolf & vampire bit?
Summit Entertainment Summit has announced that Native America...
Adam Lambert, Carrie Prejean Catfight Turns Heads in Fashion Alley
SAN DIEGO, CA - Security guards at San Diego's popular Fashion Alley Shopping Mall had a tough time separating Carrie Prejean and Adam Lambert early Sunday afternoon when a verbal spat between the two became physical.
The outdoor food court of Fas...
Twilight Movie, New Moon, Release Postponed?
News from Hollywood this morning is that the long anticipated Twilight Movie Sequel "New Moon" may be postponed, if only for a few weeks, or possibly more.
"This is the worst thing", stated a movie rep. "We have fans waiting for this movie for al...
Vince, the 'Sham-WOW' Guy Should Have Died Instead of Billy Mays(!)
The public has spoken: Vince, the much despised 'Sham-WOW' guy should be six feet under instead of Billy Mays.
Mays, the enthusiastic spokesman for miracle cleaning products was best known for his LOUD late-night TV commercials and his full, magni...
Miley Cyrus 'BJ' Photo Analysis
Hollywood, CA - A photo of Miley Cyrus in an advanced state of undress and eating a banana and jam sandwich is likely real, according to an anonymous expert with the Center of Forensic Food Pathologists in Washington D.C.
Said the source, "Analysi...
Aaron Carter's New Song "Let Go" Is About Hilary Duff!
Unbelievable but true! Aaron Carter's comeback single "Let Go" is about Hilary Duff, his ex-girlfriend... Seven years ago!
In the song, Carter sings:
"I used to love a girl,
Thinking about her makes me a little crazy.
So, I gotta let go,
Becau...
NBC Cancels The Tonight Show With Conan O'Brien
LOS ANGELES - In a move that caught a lot of people by surprise, NBC has canceled The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien after only one week.
NBC President of West Coast Operations Gregory K. Quickowitz said that the premier show had a 7.1 rating. Th...
Lydia Guevara 'in permanent vegetative state' meat-eating relatives reckon
New York - (Where's the Beef? Ass Mess): "Brain-dead idiot, they promised she'd be dripping in hundreds of carats of flawless diamonds!"
Thus Che Guevara's relatives complained today after seeing naked pictures of the Cuban revolutionary's grand...
Adam Lambert: Man With World's Largest "Mangina?"
HOLLYWOOD, CA - Sympathetic North American Idol fans, in a show of support for this year's runner-up Adam Lambert, voted the rising star "The Man With the World's Largest Mangina."
The honorary title was bestowed upon him by means of votes cast at...
Carrie Prejean Enjoys Night of Debauchery, Rebellion in San Francisco
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Residents of Fog City were shocked last night when Carrie Prejean showed up in full pageant attire, ready to paint the town red.
Fresh from being relieved of her Miss California title by "Old Mack" Donald Trump (presumably for...
C.Ronaldo reveals the truth behind mega-deal between Man U and Perez, King of Real Madrid!
C. Ronaldo flogged for 80.000.000,00 nicker to Spanish giants Real Madrid has been telling excited reporters why he desperately wanted to leave Man Utd and also divulged some details of his new contract.
Firstly Ronny named Roonie as the main r...
Female Bodybuilder Mistaken For Man In Dutch Weed Cafe
A female bodybuilder from New Jersey was challenged to a fight last night in a weed smokers cafe in the Netherlands.
Dora Piebottom, 32, of Hackensack, New Jersey, who it must be admitted looks a bit like a bloke, with all the big muscles and stuf...
Feds issued with Jackson family Encino compound search warrant
Encino, California - (Rioters): An FBI convoy of earth moving vehicles, forensic mobile laboratories and over 100 sniffer dogs has been spotted on the Ventura Freeway enroute to the Jackson family compound at Encino.
Over the road at Encino Resevo...
Michael Jackson death leaves 'King Of Pop' vacancy
The sad, unexpected and untimely death of Michael Jackson has left a void at the top of the pop tree, which has created a rush of applicants for the position of 'King Of Pop.'
Early frontrunners include Adam Lambert, Justin Timberlake and citing e...
Girls Aloud consider posing nude
Its the news men all around the World have been praying for.Well sort of,they haven't accepted it yet. In a bid to crack America, Girls Aloud have said they might pose naked for a high ranking men's magazine, after being made a lucrative offer.
Gi...
Gordon Brown will join Britains Got Talent street dance group 'Diversity' and fight the BNP
Gordon Brown the puppet Prime Minister of Britain, last night checked into the 'Priory' Hospital for loony celebrities- in an adjoining room to Susan Boyle before he embarked on a week long training session with street dance 'effnik' group 'Diversit...
The Stig revealed: a woman!
No one would have believed that in the early part of of the 21st century, a woman would have kept her identity a secret for so long. Now the identity of the 'Stig' is to be revealed on the long-running BBC series, for petrolheads,'Top Gear'.
It ha...
Lindsay Lohan topless pictures reveal gem implants
Pictures posted by Lindsay Lohan on her Twitter page show her naked from the waist up with only her long blonde hair covering her modesty. However, an eagle-eyed detective investigating an alleged gem theft has discovered what he claims are diamonds...
Body of Michael Jackson Donated to Wax Museum
The body of the late King of Pop, Michael Jackson, will be donated to the famous Wax Museum of London after the funeral. Family spokesperson Janet Jackson revealed the reasons for this in a private interview outside of the family compound.
"We t...
Villa, Silva and Xavi set to join Liverpool in shock transfer news
The beleaguered Liverpool boss Rafa Benitez from the luxury of his holiday on Menorca has revealed that the club is set to announce the transfers of some of the biggest stars in world football.
"It's true we have control of the situation," Benitez...
Jacko Death Hoax - What Went Wrong?
Michael Jackson had spent the last two years of his life planning an elaborate death hoax, an insider revealed this morning. Having seen how record sales skyrocketed after the sudden death of his ex-Father-in-law Elvis Presley, Jacko started making p...
Michael Jackson Seen Alive In Las Vegas!
Las Vegas was in a stir Sunday night when Michael Jackson was spotted at Caesar's Palace and went fleeing from fans,
"He's not dead!"
"There he is, he's not dead. Michael Jackson is alive!"
Next he was seen near the Bellagio where a lady...
Crop Circle Of World's Largest Penis Appears In Oxfordshire - Several Spoof Writers Questioned By Police
Police this morning executed dawn raids on several writers for satirical website theSpoof.com following the discovery of the world's largest crop circle penis in a barley field in Oxfordshire. So far, no arrests have been made.
The enormous crop c...
Isla Fisher's Topless Coffee Shop Approved After Rousing Debate
VASSALBORO, Maine -- The issue started when Isla Fisher a successful businesswoman opened a topless coffee shop in Maine.
The coffee shop named, "The Grand View", opened in Vassalboro, Maine. Fisher argues her business is protected by the constitu...
Al Sharpton Blames Michael Jackson Death on Whitey
In a news conference outside of Harlem's Apollo Theatre, Al Sharpton took the microphone and blamed the death of Michael Jackson (heart attack in his Los Angeles area home) on "Whitey."
When asked how whitey was responsible for the death of a form...
Teen queens, Brenda Song & Kristen Stewart mock Rob Pattinson
Teen queens, Brenda Song and Kristen Stewart have recently mocked Rob Pattinson, Brenda in a recent interview criticized his acting skills and mocked his style. While, Kristen imitated Pattinson on a recent Youtube video.
In response to the video...
Britney Spears' Vagina Opens in London
The Britney Spears' circus pulled into London today and the freaks piled out of the clown car like investors escaping General Motors. The anxious crowd waited patiently for Spears to exit and were not disappointed as she finally climbed out crotch fi...
Michael Jackson converted to scientology before dying
Micheal Jackson converted to the Church of Scientology before his sudden death last night.
The 'King of Poo Poo' apparently made the decision after watching a Tom Cruise movie in which Tom Cruise takes off his shirt and makes love to a woman weari...
The REAL Reason Why Michael Jackson Died!
Amongst all the other conspiracy theories that are awash on the Internet, and there is ONE which is the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Of all the places to find the truth, The Thespoof.com is the one place that people would not lo...
Michael Jackson Family Sues MSNBC, FOXnews, CNN, and CNBC
The family of the late King of Pop Michael Jackson have collectively sued MSNBC, CNN, CNBC, and Foxnews. The news networks had given the Jackson family over 48 hours of uninterrupted news coverage, discussion, and exposure during the recent death of...
Ed McMahon Estate Sues Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett Estates
The estate of late entertainer Ed McMahon has sued the estates of Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett. Lawyers for the late Tonight Show sidekick say that Jackson and Fawcett stole deserved and scheduled publicity from their client with their prematu...
Michael Jackson Wants To Meet Shaheen Jafargholi
GARY, Indiana - Gary, Indiana's most famous native, Michael Jackson has told his manager that he wants to meet Britain's Got Talent contestant Shaheen Jarfargholi.
The "Gloved One" said that he was impressed with the 12-year-old wonderboy from Wal...
Michael Jackson suspected of faking his own death, again
California - (Intestate Bankrupt Ass Mess): The tribute act known as Michael Jackson is believed to have faked his own death once again.
Early reports from the Seedy Sinai Clinic say Jackson, 69, suffered a simulated fatal heart attack this aftern...
Robert Pattinson Takes A Leak! ...Several Times A Day
Los Angeles, CA - Pattinson, star of the Twilight series, is actually human. While no picture of the hunky dream with dirty hair have surfaced depicting him voiding his bladder, the story is true just the same. Ladies and little girls, Robert Patti...
Michael Jackson is dead and 'Brit Award' saboteur Jarvis Cocker is banned from the funeral
Media demon Michael Jackson 50 is dead causing the world media to go into shock. Some tabloids speculate he died to get back into the limelight after the rise of Susan Boyle and the illnesses of Jade Goody, Farah Fawcett and Patrick Swayze. However t...
Spoofer formerly known as Man with Largest Penis Deboned by Cyber Stalker!
Cyber Space News - Bargis Tryrol, the creation of Grand Spoofer Buckwheat, and formerly known as The Man with the World's Largest Penis, has been cut down to size after an ill fated personal meeting arranged on the internet with a serial Deboner an...
Second Life Porn Scandal
Popular diversionary alternate reality Second Life has been rocked by a porn scandal.
Avatars Jennie89 and Kyle101 filmed a sordid sex scene using predefined actions available to any user of the virtual world. In a property they had bought through...
North Korea Takes Aim at Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch
HOLLYWOOD: It has been brought to our attention that North Korea may be preparing to move it's missle carrying ship to the southern coast of California. Their newest target? Neverland Ranch, former home and playground of the late pop star, Michael...
Egyptian Man Cuts Off His Penis For Deli
CAIRO -- An Egyptian man has cut off his own penis and presented it at his local delicatessen in order that they might pickle it for a take-away snack.
Police say the man entered the local Subway restaurant and was told that they were out of cold...
Woman Sues Pharmaceutical Company After Growing Penis
A West Texas woman, Mrs. Jean Smith, told reporters Friday that she had been told that her husband's "penis helper" would also help her so she began taking them a few months ago. Then she noticed a growth and went to see a Doctor Juan across the bord...
Lindsay Lohan and 'Bikini Girl' To Star In "The Lolitas"
HOLLYWOOD - Clint Eastwood has just announced that he will be directing Lindsay Lohan and Katrina Darrell aka "Bikini Girl" in the Amaretto Monteverdi production of The Lolitas
The film is based on the story by Danielle Sweetwater. The original mo...
Miley Cyrus Punches Perez Hilton
LOS ANGELES - For the second time this week, Tinseltown website blogger Perez Hilton has been punched in the face.
First it was Polo Molina, the manager of The Black Eyed Peas and now it is none other than 16-year-old Miley Cyrus aka Hannah Monta...
New Moon Rushed, Not The Classic Of First Twilight, Says Former Director Hardwick
Catherine Hardwick, who directed the first Twilight and was let go after being pressured by Summit Entertainment to get another one out as soon as she could. Now rushing "New Moon" may have come back to "bite" them on the ass.
Hardwick wanted to d...
Sanford's Mistress Identified as Hitler's Daughter
Authorities in Buenos Aires have identified South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford's mistress as Veronica Braun-the daughter of former Nazi dictator Adolph Hitler and his wife, Eva Braun.
The 49-year-old Veronica Braun had successfully kept her pa...
McDonald's set to Crack Down on Free Drink Refills
Due to the bad economy, more people have been engaging in random "drink sniping". What exactly is "drink sniping?" It's street for people who are not legally entitled to a free complimentary refill at their local McDonald's. According to McDonald's e...
Stallone wants Lambert for Ultimate Sequel
Adam Lambert has been approached by Sylvester Stallone to star in what he predicts will be the last sequel to his two best-known cinema vehicles.
"I am unable to discuss this with you at the moment as there are cooler publications in which I could...
Adam Lambert Gets Out Restraining Against Simon Cowell
According to the Bollywood Times, American Idol runner-up Adam Lambert has had to get a personal restraining order out against show judge, Simon Cowell and he claims he had a very good reason to do so.
Lambert told the Times that Simon keeps poppi...
Hilary Duff & Lindsay Lohan To Star In The Same Movie?
Former ennemies Hilary Duff and Lindsay Lohan are set to star, together, in the same movie!
Duff's representative has announced last night that "Hilary and Lindsay will be both on the set of 'The Great Education', alongside Ben Kingsley, Queen Lat...
Michael Jackson O2 Dates Cancelled
It's been reported in the last few minutes, that Michael Jackson, the self-styled King of Pop who was due to start a 50-date string of appearances at the O2 Arena in London in July, has been forced to cancel the shows, due to ill-health.
Jackson,...
Obama Kills Fly During TV Interview - PETA Outraged
Washington, DC - As a result of President Obama executing a fly during a CNBC television interview, calls came in from the PETA organization, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, for the President's immediate resignation.
"It's an outrage,...
Culkin: May Your Neverland Dreams Live Forever
LOS ANGELES COUNTY, CA - "Maybe now everyone will remember the man for his achievements and legacy he's left behind, rather than his faults and his allegations," said Macaulay Carson Culkin, of his close friend and "undercover lover" Michael Jackson'...
Michael Jackson Autopsy Led By Roswell Doctor
There was hardly a whimper today when news emerged that the doctor carrying out the autopsy of the now-dead King of Pop, Michael Jackson, is the same man that was in charge of the investigation into the so-called Roswell UFO Incident in 1947.
Rosw...
Chastity Bono To Become Chaz Boner
Beverly Hills, CA - Reports are coming out of Los Angeles that the daughter of Sonny Bono and Cher is going to change her gender. Chastity Bono, born in...69, currently looking like she was separated at birth from the late comedian John Candy, has ch...
Russell Brand To Tour With Susan Boyle and Shaheen Jafargholi
LONDON - Simon Cowell's 19th Hole Productions has just signed Russell Brand, Susan Boyle, and little 12-year-old Shaheen Jafargholi to go on a 61-city concert tour of the United Kingdom.
Cowell said that he first approached Brand at a London boxin...
Lindsay Lohan: Ready To Marry Samantha Ronson?
Actress/singer Lindsay Lohan has said that she is "not ready to get married" yet, speaking about how many celebrities marry young.
The former teen queen, who will turn 23 on July 2 and who just came back to normal girlfriend, DJ Samantha Ronson, t...
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