Funny story:  Waldo Found, Forced to Pay Child Support

Waldo Found, Forced to Pay Child Support

Mexico City, Mexico - The twenty-year search for Waldo is over. The beloved star of the book series "Where's Waldo" disappeared in 1987 from his home just outside of London, England. A group of children spotted him at a beach in Southern Mexico.
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Funny story:  No Worries Mate? Rising Inflection No Longer Interrogative?

No Worries Mate? Rising Inflection No Longer Interrogative?

Australian actresses and pseudo-Aussie dickingtons need no longer be ashamed of their defining speech mannerism! "Brace yourself Sheila?" - The best-known Australian courtship ritual is now recognised as a statement, not a question. For all thi...
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Funny story:  Revealed: The Mystery of the Piranha Found in Devon River

Revealed: The Mystery of the Piranha Found in Devon River

It sounds like a Monty Python sketch - 'The Dead Piranha Sketch'. At first, mystery surrounded the discovery of a 14 inch piranha in a Devon River. Environment agency staff were sampling the riverbank were amazed to discover the strange looking f...
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Funny story:  Mats Sundin will take to ice in Vancouver Canucks season opener dressed as team mascot.

Mats Sundin will take to ice in Vancouver Canucks season opener dressed as team mascot.

VANCOUVER -BC: After dithering away half the season last year and then lumbering across the ice like an overfed, out-of-shape beluga, Mats Sundin is once again back to playing his one-man hide-and-seek game with the Vancouver Canucks. According t...
View 'Mats Sundin will take to ice in Vancouver Canucks season opener dressed as team mascot.'
Funny story:  "Wouldn't piss on his goddam coffin if it was on fire!"

"Wouldn't piss on his goddam coffin if it was on fire!"

Kennebunkport - (Chappaquiddick Mess): "Goddam bastard killed my sister Mary Jo. Now this frickin bell book n candle freakshow? Send Dubya if he's sober. Hell'll freeze over before I budge." President George Bush Senior is boycotting Mary Jo Kope...
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Funny story:  George Bush and Dick Cheney Accidently Shoot Each Other in the Face

George Bush and Dick Cheney Accidently Shoot Each Other in the Face

Crawford TX - A spokesman for ex-President Bush said Dick Cheney arrived this morning for a "sit down" with George Bush. The spokesman acknowledged that George Bush had been upset with remarks that Dick Cheney had released to the press in recent mont...
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Funny story:  New British Army head pledges to defend Britain

New British Army head pledges to defend Britain

General Sir David Richards has pledged to focus on the defence of the United Kingdom, as he takes over the post as head of the British Army. 'It will be no easy task', he said, 'as we must use all of our resources to fight back against the almost...
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Funny story:  Naked Man Crashes School Bus, Interrupts Chicken and Beer Session w/Ludacris

Naked Man Crashes School Bus, Interrupts Chicken and Beer Session w/Ludacris

ATLANTA, GA - A man in the nude hijacked a school bus full of teenagers Thursday in Atlanta, said police. Students were only able to laugh and torment their naked captor for a couple of minutes before he finally had to confront a student, accordin...
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Funny story:  US Spoofers admit problems in understanding their Brit colleagues' very "Black Humour"

US Spoofers admit problems in understanding their Brit colleagues' very "Black Humour"

Regular Brit Spoof forum participants have recently began to realise that some of their US colleagues live on a different "Satirical Planet"! Recent forum altercations between some US Spoofers and their Brit colleagues have proven that satirical h...
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Funny story:  Edward "Ted" Kennedy:  "Top Shelf" or just "Bargain Basement"?

Edward "Ted" Kennedy: "Top Shelf" or just "Bargain Basement"?

(New York-NY) Ted Kennedy, the Lion of the Senate or given his girth more like the Whale, died this week. The 40-year Senator eulogized by politicians while Twitter tweets "Mary Jo Kopechne is probably giving Ted an earful right now as he makes his descent into purgatory for a LONG time." What does it mean, not for the Kennedy legacy but for me? Hey, I never claimed to be a saint or even Irish Cat...
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Funny story:  Average Adult Entertainments Industry Worker Goes Blind Within Six Years

Average Adult Entertainments Industry Worker Goes Blind Within Six Years

A new study by Playguy of its own staff shows that the average time employees last is six years, but they usually leave when their vision can still be saved by wearing special lens in their glasses. When the study was completed, Playguy, out of c...
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Funny story:  JACKO Report: Readership Decline Threatens Entitlement Programs at "The Spoof"

JACKO Report: Readership Decline Threatens Entitlement Programs at "The Spoof"

SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Even as some spoof writers lobbied vigorously for the largest expansion of veteran writer entitlements in The Spoof's history, a report from the site's Jackson Aftermath Comedy Kickback Operative (JACKO) indicates that key spoof v...
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Funny story:  Football hooliganism rears it's lovely head, especially when the Milwall Firm wants some BOVVVER!

Football hooliganism rears it's lovely head, especially when the Milwall Firm wants some BOVVVER!

The British authorities thought they had Hooliganism under control, well think again Mother F*ckers, the boys are back in town, big time! Attempting to obliterate Hooliganism in the UK is roughly the same as cutting off Medusa's heads, wiping out...
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Funny story:  North Pole Tragedy

North Pole Tragedy

A Polish criminal living in Glasgow was knocked down and killed while out celebrating after legally changing his name. Peter Kowsky 33 originally from Warsaw took the unusual step of applying to the courts to become Mr.Deed Poll in an attempt to m...
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Funny story:  Lindsay Lohan Transports $2 Million In Jewels In A Pair of Panties

Lindsay Lohan Transports $2 Million In Jewels In A Pair of Panties

HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Actress Lindsay Lohan last week made a statement to the LAPD that someone had broken into her home and stolen her safe, a safe weighing 3,591 pounds. When Miss Lohan was asked by LAPD Detective Hank Battlecreek what the contents...
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Funny story:  Scientists Harness Power from Bad Journalism

Scientists Harness Power from Bad Journalism

The world's energy problems might have been solved by a group of scientists in Oxford who have found a way to store power released by bad journalism. The twin calamities of tautologies (an unnecessary repetition of meaning using different words) a...
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Funny story:  New Spoof Readers' Wives striptease section a winner

New Spoof Readers' Wives striptease section a winner

Cyberspace - (Reuters & Ass Mess): The online publishing industry is gobsmacked at the success of the newly launched Spoof Readers' Wives striptease section that has seen a lot of midnight ejaculate - er, ratings! - hit the roof. Franchised by...
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Funny story:  Hard Right's Mysterious Doings In The Wilds Of Alaska

Hard Right's Mysterious Doings In The Wilds Of Alaska

A huge luxury yacht leased by the dastardly Dick Cheney, once a member of the notorious Bush gang, has been seen plying the waters of Glacier Bay National Park in Alaska. Only a month before the sailing yacht belonging to Ruppert Murdoch was also...
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Funny story:  Plastination nutter Von HaagenDaz says Kennedy left his body to science

Plastination nutter Von HaagenDaz says Kennedy left his body to science

Berlin - (Ass Mess): It was always Senator Ted Kennedy's dying wish was to be plastinated by German anatomist Gunther Von Haagendaz according to a press release today. And now the embalming nutter wants to start stripping away those corpulent laye...
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Funny story:  Bernie Madoff Now Accused Of Singing Frog Swindle

Bernie Madoff Now Accused Of Singing Frog Swindle

Apparently alongside his crooked investment schemes, officers have now discovered that Bernie Madoff stole millions more by selling the same "Singing Frog" over and over again. "First he'd use a really big toad and hide a small bug made in Japan u...
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Funny story:  Santilli to issue Ted Kennedy autopsy video

Santilli to issue Ted Kennedy autopsy video

Groom Lake, Nevada - (X-Files Mess): Master mortician Ray Santilli is to publish his Ted Kennedy autopsy video amid concerns the Massachussetts senator was an alien hybrid. The Roswell specialist reckons he has proof that Rose FitzGerald Kennedy's...
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Funny story:  Daily Planet Bankrupt, Will Print Last Copy Tomorrow

Daily Planet Bankrupt, Will Print Last Copy Tomorrow

Metropolis KS-- The Daily Planet will cease to exist after tomorrow. The legendary newspaper of Metropolis is the latest victim of declining circulation that has traumatized the newspaper industry in the last year. A last minute rescue attempt by f...
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Funny story:  Ban Ki-moon "asks firmly" to speak with Iran

Ban Ki-moon "asks firmly" to speak with Iran

The UN Security Council has been thrown into chaos with the revelation that UN Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon was "firm" in an email to Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. The normally reserved South Korean, who once went without a pen for two w...
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Funny story:  Macaulay Culkin Writes A Tell-All Book On Michael Jackson

Macaulay Culkin Writes A Tell-All Book On Michael Jackson

LOS ANGELES - Actor Macaulay Culkin who knew Michael Jackson just about as well as anyone has just published a book that deals with his close friendship with the 'Gloved One.' The book is titled Neverland Was Originally Named The N Word Land. Culk...
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Funny story:  Boozy Brits Drink 80 Beers In One Week Holiday

Boozy Brits Drink 80 Beers In One Week Holiday

In a shock report, the Ministry of Health has announced that British holidaymakers habitually drink 80 beers in a one-week holiday! "This is disgusting" says Health Minister Gillian Merron "they are risking their health and wellbeing for momentary...
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Funny story:  The Second Genesis

The Second Genesis

According to last night on BBC 4, we are apparently on the verge of a nervous breakthrough. Cell research has progressed to the point where we can make a new generation of the human race without shagging each other. Admittedly that could be a good thing. There never has been any insurance policy against waking up in bed with an absolute minger after several ales. At first I thought a second gen...
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Funny story:  The Search for the American Left

The Search for the American Left

With the passing of Edward Kennedy America has apparently lost an icon of the left. But did the left ever exist? In a nation which recently paralleled fixing some skint person's teeth for free, with the immediate re-emergence of Stalin, how left can it be? In the UK you could probably stick your hand down the back of the sofa and come up with an anarchist trying to blow up an oil rig. In Ameri...
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Funny story:  Aging Vets Send Questionnaire to Aging Dem Politicians: Why don't you check out instead?

Aging Vets Send Questionnaire to Aging Dem Politicians: Why don't you check out instead?

Pork Chop Hill Nusing Home/ Arlington, Va/ Veterans News - In a response to a condescending questionaire by the Obama Health Care Death Squads, a hastily formed platoon of aging Korean War Vets prepared their own 'Quality of Life" guide sheet for a h...
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Funny story:  Two Pensioners Enraged over Edinburgh Fringe Festival Joke

Two Pensioners Enraged over Edinburgh Fringe Festival Joke

Two pensioners living in Stirling are considering suing comedian Dan Antopolski for making a joke out of their names. The 36-year-old funnyman won a prize, the 'Dave Award' for the best joke of the entire Edinburgh fringe comedy festival. Ed Jogs...
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Funny story:  Ted Kennedy Died Because Death Squad Denied Him Medical Coverage

Ted Kennedy Died Because Death Squad Denied Him Medical Coverage

Senator Ted Kennedy was one of the first people to be covered under Barack Obama's new Health Care Plan. His death was actually a result of his not being approved to received medical treatment after being turned down by a "death squad." Head of t...
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Funny story:  Madonna explains American comments

Madonna explains American comments

Madonna said she was compelled to comment on the discrimination against Americans while she was on stage in Romania, despite being laughed at by everyone. The 61-year old was laughed at by millions after saying the discrimination 'made me realise...
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Funny story:  Changing times: Swearing, Censorship, Ofcom and Keats

Changing times: Swearing, Censorship, Ofcom and Keats

This week, Ofcom will release new legislation for swearing on TV. Frank Miller investigates the past, present and future of what is termed 'Classical English'. Times change We're aware of the changing times where swear words from yesterday may not be deemed offensive by todays standards. A History lesson Did you know that English bylaws of the 1800's stated that public flogging was a reg...
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Funny story:  Austrian dungeonmaster Fritzl behind Jaycee Lee Dugard abduction?

Austrian dungeonmaster Fritzl behind Jaycee Lee Dugard abduction?

El Dorado - (Reuterus): Was jailed Austrian incest nutter Joseph Fritzl the inspiration behind Phillip Garrido's 1991 abduction and impregnation of 11 year-old US schoolgirl Jaycee Lee Dugard? California police are probing the claim after a tipoff...
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Funny story:  Michael Jackson definitely alive

Michael Jackson definitely alive

It has once again been confirmed that Micahel Jackson is alive and well, this time working as deputy manager serving in the downtown Minnesota branch of Kentrucky Tried Chicken. The manager of the branch, a portly gentleman in a white suit called...
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Funny story:  Apollo-11 landing fakers gave Dutch PM spoof rock

Apollo-11 landing fakers gave Dutch PM spoof rock

Amsterdam - (Dark Side of the Moon Mess): A lump of petrified wood sourced to some paranoid Texan Bushes and billed as a genuine moonrock was given to Dutch PM Willem Drees by the Apollo-11 landing fakers. The alien artefact was found near the Buz...
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Funny story:  A Czar of Czars

A Czar of Czars

The venerable question that has bewildered scholars and thinkers of the Bolshevistic persuasion since Peter the Great is: how many czars does a czar need, and does a czar need a czar to watch over his czars? The urgency for an answer to the preceding query manifested itself in the most incongruous manner. During a meeting in the Oval Office, while deliberating the necessity of appointing a s...
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Funny story:  Government Outsourcing

Government Outsourcing

ADVERTISEMENT Tenders are invited for the supply of a United Kingdom government. The present public/private partnership has broken down, is obsolescent and must be replaced before next April Fool's Day. It is envisaged that companies such as Halliburton, Brown& Root and the Royal Bank of Scotland would be exemplary offerors. Scope Of Supply: Offerors are to provide a complete gover...
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Funny story:  Michael Jackson to Be Buried Above Marilyn Monroe

Michael Jackson to Be Buried Above Marilyn Monroe

Los Angeles, Ca., USA The reasoning behind the numerous delays in laying Michael Jackson's decaying corpse to rest were cleared up today when Elsie Poncher announced that representatives of Jackson's estate had purchased the vault directly above the...
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Funny story:  Obama Orders 300M Copies Of Birth Certificate

Obama Orders 300M Copies Of Birth Certificate

Washington, DC - At a press conference held in the White House West Wing, Press Secretary Robert Gibbs has announced President Obama is going to address the concerns of birthers, and those sitting on the fence. "As I speak, President Obama is sign...
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Funny story:  Prison Break Based on True Story

Prison Break Based on True Story

North Dakota - A producer of the TV Series Prison Break, came forward with the news that Prison Break is based on the forgotten prison break incident at North Dakota State Penitentiary in 1961. The government never televised information about the...
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Funny story:  Ted Kennedy's Head Still Alive, Attached To 16-Year-Old Female Body

Ted Kennedy's Head Still Alive, Attached To 16-Year-Old Female Body

Ted Kennedy is not only alive but he's having more fun than a cat with five peckers according to an inside source who asked that he not be named or "all those wild conspiracy theories will spring up again. "The next thing you know there'll be witn...
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Funny story:  Ted Kennedy Actually Dead Ten Hours Before it was Reported

Ted Kennedy Actually Dead Ten Hours Before it was Reported

In a stunning news announcement, it was learned today that Ted Kennedy was actually dead for ten hours before it was reported. Instead of dying in his home on Tuesday evening, it actually happened in the early afternoon. One of those involved, sp...
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