London (Phantom press) - It's been a bad week for the BOE governor after a grilling from the select committee on the Northern Rock fiasco.
Bloodyvostock, Siberia - (Daily Ass Messki Interview Excerpt): "I had expected to find President Vladimir Putain cold, sinister and aggressive," the Daily Tosser's foreign editor Dave Blather said today, "but instead I fou...
Cardiff, Wales - (Ass Mess & ReuterUs): Voice of an Angel and Crotch of a Rabid Hyena singing superstar Charlotte Church has given birth.
(New York) - Islamic fundamentalist trouble maker and Iran president, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, today announced he is accepting an invitation to become a full time professor at New York's Columbia University.
The National Viewers Association declared that the BBC evening news at 10 o'clock was a blight on the evening entertainment schedules of the BBC's flagship channel.
Washington (IP) - George Bush, who is the head of the American Bushstapo, vetoed the bill that would have funded poor children's insurance.
County Hall - (Ass Mess): "We are totally and utterly f**ed!" a heavily perspiring Ken Livingstone, Mayor of London, shouted today at Chancellor of the Exchequer Alistair Darling after the Law Lords once again ruled that Chevron Oil has exc...
By deciding to 'celebrate' his semi retirement by floating across the length and breadth of Britain in what he is cheekily calling, 'my own last supper', Portuguese sex symbol, Jose Mourinho has finally announced what many of us have...
Chelsea - (Ridiculous Mess): Ex-Chelsea FC coach Jose Mourinho was reportedly seen in queue outside the Kings Road branch of the Northern Rock Bank today clutching several large holdalls and flanked by heavies.
The World Cup is over for the England Women's football team after they were 'licked' by the USA today in China.
Los Angeles - (Ass Mess): Singer Britney Spears has hit out over a witch-hunt campaign that has resulted in her being charged in a hit and run incident.
Supremo El Courto, USA - Today the U.S. Supreme Court, in a 4 to 3 ruling, determined that the word "Gay" means "happy" and does not have any sex preferential meanings what-so-ever.
Welcome friends, enemies and enemas,...
In what is being called 'Final Societal Breakdown' or F.S.B. by social commentators, violent teenage gang members throughout America are beginning to demand expensive Psychoanalysis from top shrinks, sometimes even making their demands at gun...
A mental patient has praised the TV talk show host Oprah Winfrey for shooting his poodle with her AK-47 assault rifle.
Original American Idol winner, Kelly Clarkson has written an open letter to show business paper Vanity urging Pope Benedict XVI to cease his constant following of her.
England Women will face a tough test in the Quarter Finals of the Women's World Cup in China when they come up against the improving United States who beat Nigeria 1-0 to top Group B.
In a move that is worrying pharmaceutical companies, many GPs up and down the country have stopped prescribing anti-depressant drugs to patients and have started to prescribe TheSpoof! instead.
ANNAPOLIS, MD -- In an inspiring yet confusing speech this afternoon, Governor Martin O'Malley outlined his new tax proposal, designed to eradicate the state's huge budget deficit. The governor's plan, described by some as "inane,&q...
New Cleaverland - It was a sunny day in a New York's Central Park yesterday and peaceful. Oh yes there was the occasional mugging and purse snatching and dope deals, but largely everyone was minding their own business.
Through a spokesman, Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has just announced that he is expected to begin his new job as an NYC cab driver on Wednesday, following an appearance at a forum at Columbia University on Monday and addresses the United Nat...
This week: Man discovered who has no Knowledge of 'American Idol'; Blog started about Blog; Firm advertises for "Soulless Idiot"; Washington Think Tank thinks it's irrelevant; Study shows more people are stupid; and New reality...