Drowning Street, London - (Armageddon Press): Getting out of her chauffered Rolls Royce outside 10 Downing Street today former UK Primce Monster Margaret Thatcher had clearly pissed herself ahead of he carefully choreographed tea and crumpets visit t...
Prison guards looked on with amazement as two daring convicts escaped from a top security prison in Leicester by climbing a ladder.
Royal Courts of Justice, London - (Told-You-So!-Mess): One of the UK's most senior judges in the Law Lords, Court of Appeal and on secondment to the litigation division of the UN Security Council is celebrating tonight as the City of London brace...
City of London - (Disaster Press): UK mortgage lender Northern Rock is going down the toilet pan and has had to ask the Bank of England to bail it out with a massive billion pound tide-over.
Hollywood, California - (Cheeky Ass Mess): Oh yeah? Shag-a-virgin internet sites have gone ballistic during the last 24 hours after High School Musical dusky beauty Vanessa Hudgens hotly denied being pregnant and claimed that she still has a...
Our lord and master, Gordon 'Irn Brun' Brown, has met the former PM Margaret Thatcher. He intends to adapt his policies in order to gain more popular support, or votes; whichever comes most easily.
A newly-qualified lawyer found work in the Fines Enforcement office of a Magistrates' Court.
Tubby 90's action hero, Steven Seagal has been spotted placing notices on store windows in Boise, Idaho, calling on fat girls to howl at his house.
Liza Lotte , the founder and patron of the Brain-dead Pagans Association, has called on peace-loving Russian premier Vladimir Putin to end his country's ban on boogie-woogie music.
Tennis player and David Miliband lookalike Tim Henman has been seriously injured today when he tried to sere three balls in a foolish attempt to make himself look good.
Glenn Dale, Maryland - (Bare Ass Mess): A Glenn Dale Elementary School's fifth graders were amused to find that a long-promised treat of a DVD classroom showing turned out to be the seminal porno-flick Star Whores and not, as their teach...
London - (Ass Mess): UK Prime Monster Gorgon Brown is reported to have given the nod for the National Lottery's Heritage Fund to pay Kate and Gerry McCann's legal fees after various New labour cash-for-honors peers pulled out from extending...
Los Angeles, California - (Bareassed Cheek Mess): High School Musical starlet Vanessa Hudgens has been picked for a Sex & the City movie plum role that Oscar-winning Dreamgirls actress Jennifer Hudson thought was a done dea...
Two men were shot dead in Hampshire this morning after they bungled a bank raid, and were the victims of a 'shooting gallery-style' onslaught by police, who killed them to pieces.
Spain has bowed to growing international pressure from the animal rights lobby and is to 'even the odds' in bullfighting.
Christian radical groups in Swansea have claimed to have found the second coming in a quite unexpected form.
Sydney, Australia - (Ass Mess): Australia's famous Dingo Baby Mother, Lindy Chamberlain, has added her 50c worth to the McCann family controversy as they fight to clear their names in a Portuguese press-fueled furor about the disappearance of the...
After years of struggling to deal with complex documents of state and struggling to string a sentence together in important speeches US president George Bush has decided to finally complete his high school education as a part time mature student.
British Airways is to bring back the Supersonic Concorde, that last flew in October 2003, after spending upwards of £500 million on refurbishing the previously moth-balled aircraft.
Police are bracing themselves for a big shift in public order offences over the next few weeks, as the Rugby World Cup hots up.
As in almost all these stories, tales of wild, gay sex, possible murder, drug abuse, multiple overdoses, inevitably rumors of a sex tape comes into play. Is there a tape? Who has it? When will it surface? Is it in focus? How is the lighting?...
Yes, that's right Rita Crosby's new book, Blonde Ambition, is nothing more than speculation already leaked to the public in TheSpoof.com. To prove the point Crosby's book released Sept. 4, 2007 claims Larry Birkhead and Howard K. Stern w...
Moscow, Russia - From Russia with Straight Love? After the rumored U.S. air force development of a hormone based Gay Bomb that would make enemy soldiers more interested in getting to "know" each other in the Biblical sense of the word rathe...
Now that Roger Federer has won the US Open for the fourth time in a row, his 12th Grand Slam title, the USTA is taking action by having him undergo mandatory android testing. This is the first time such dramatic action has been taken since Pete Sampr...
Wash. DC -- A court today found former President George Bush guilty of taking more than $85 million in bribes and kickbacks, and sentenced him to life imprisonment, one year after he was ousted amid mass protests and military defections.
Why did the two stars brawl at the MTV Video Music Awards show over the weekend?...
Everyone viewing and attending the recent MTV Video Music Awards were aghast at the lackluster performance turned in by America's sweetheart, Britney Spears. Spears looked less like a pop princess and more like a pooped princess, a zombie from th...
The New England Patriots apologized for spying on the signal calling against the New York Jets in a recent NFL game. Head coach Bill Belicheck said that it was an unprofessional and unsportsmanlike conduct and that he would not do it again. The Pat...
Democratic Presidential hopeful and Congressman Dennis Kucinich secured the very small minority Moslem support today in his campaign for the presidency. Speaking from the Middle East, he blasted the participation in the war by the western allies.